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BeckWatch: The Straight Talk Express Don't Run Through These Parts

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It doesn't take a high IQ to figure out that John McCain doesn't exactly measure up to Glenn Beck's definition of a conservative, but the candidate's recent endorsement from the New York Times has positively sent CNN's Tsar of Tautologies over the edge! "These people are out of their mind socialists, as left as you can get. And then they think it's a good idea to endorse John McCain." It's hard to parse the logic: is he saying the Times is naive? That McCain is a "socialist?" Who knows? All that matters to Beck is that the two find themselves in one another's warm embrace.

The basic outrage for Beck is that the Grey Lady makes copious mention of McCain's recent pandering to right-wing interests -- a suspect contrast to the "Straight Talk Express" of eight years ago. "[With a] record of working across the aisle to develop sound bipartisan legislation, he would offer a choice to a broader range of Americans than the rest of the Republican field. We have shuddered at Mr. McCain's occasional tactical pander to the right because he has demonstrated that he has the character to stand on principle."

Beck's reaction?

I mean, I just can't believe John McCain [is] never called a flip-flopper. On abortion, 180 degree turn. He was favoring only the most minor restrictions and opposing overturning Roe versus Wade. Now he supports almost a total ban, says the Supreme Court should reverse Roe versus Wade immediately. He, of course, was a deficit hawk. He mocked supply side economics. Now he's, you know, to the point where he's claiming raising taxes decreases revenues. I mean, he completely reversed himself there. He used to hate ethanol. Now he loves it. He used to hate -- Jerry Falwell he called an agent of intolerance. Now he's giving commencements addresses.

Naturally, it's hard to see what Beck's true beef is. After all, in just about every position switch he criticizes McCain for is simply an example of McCain migrating to a position that Beck himself favors! But the real apotheosis of inanity comes when Beck suggests how this phenommenon could be captured in campaign ads.

BECK: I mean, we should be -- here's an ad for John McCain that he should run:


VOICE: John McCain is running for President. Take a good look at his voting record and where he stands on the important issues of our time and you'll find out who the right vote for America is. "I'm John McCain and I approved this message."

GLENN: Except you could run it this way and it would probably be more effective:

VOICE: John McCain is running for President. Take a good look at his voting record and where he stands on the important issues of our time and you'll find out who the right vote for America is. "I'm Mitt Romney and I approved this message."

Sweet fancy Moses! Beck thinks that Mitt Romney is the guy to criticize McCain for switching positions? Somewhere in Beckland, a glass house is about to get leveled in a hail of stones!