Fox's O'Reilly To Release Memoir This Fall That Is Already Quite Unintentionally Hilarious

Those of you who follow the goings-on of the Wingnut Welfare Book Club, or who are just tired of books that don't provide the sort of cognitive dissonance normally associated with getting whanged on the dome with a socket wrench, should mark their calendars and save this date: September 23, 2008. That is the day that Fox News' Bill O'Reilly will add the seventeen billionth entry to the overstuffed genre of quasi-celebrity memoirs with the release of his latest book, A Bold Fresh Piece of Humanity.

That's right. The book is actually called A Bold Fresh Piece of Humanity, which is practically begging for you commenters to mock it, at great length. According to the stub on Amazon.com, the title refers to an anecdote from O'Reilly's childhood:

In 1957, in the heart of the Eisenhower years, in the third grade classroom of Sister Mary Lurana in Saint Brigid's parochial school in Westbury, Long Island, was a mouthy, obstreperous kid by the name of William O'Reilly. Quite a handful he was, and so one day Sister Mary bent over him in exasperation in response to some piece of mischief and told him to his face, "William, you are a bold fresh piece of humanity." Little did she know that she was, early in his career as a troublemaker, defining the essence of Bill O'Reilly and providing him with the title of his brash and entertaining issues-based memoir.

Yes. LITTLE DID SHE KNOW! Of course, there's evidence to suggest that Sister Mary Lurana was actually very prescient, and was playing the long con. Why do I suggest this? Well, as it happens, one anagram for "A Bold Fresh Piece of Humanity" is "Shameful, Bona-Fide Hypocrite." This proves, once again, that the English language is a marvelous and mysterious thing.

Comments

[partisanpolitico]

How dare you people!!! He is a hard-working journalist­....ack...­'scuse me, I just threw up in my mouth a little, where was I? .... journalist? I can't, I can't.

[newworldman777]

Perhaps this book will give us a nostalgic glimpse of the "good ol' days," when Billo was a kid -- the days that he pines for, even today. You know...the days when Jim Crow was raging in the South. The days when the Christian religion was shoved down our collective throats with prayer in public school and with public nativity scenes, and such as that, openly exhibited on every street corner, public square and shop window. The days when our immigration policy was still annually allowing to immigrate to America 65,000 immigrants from Great Britain, 35,000 from Germany, yet less than 3000 from all of Asia and only 1,500 from Africa (until 1965). The days when we were raping our environment. The days when we were meddling into the internal affairs of other countries -- such as Iran -- for our own selfish benefit, resulting in negative blowback that we must deal with today. Ah, the good ol' days of Billo's youth. If we could just send him back there now.

[naschkatze]

Funny, I had the same thoughts when I read Noonan's recent piece in WSJ contrast the (wonderful) "old" America of John McCain and the (unchartered, a.k.a. fearful) "new" America of Obama.

[BigLib]

Audacity of Hope = Please Don't Call Me a Marxist.

[StandUpAmerica08]

Ooooo... I can't wait to read about his twisted little childhood. I wonder if he yelled at his momma "I CAN'T READ THAT! WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? NEVERMIND, WE'LL DO IT LIVE, WE'LL DO IT LIVE!"

Poor pathetic crazy rat boy

[Daly]

come on, the man lies every day and you expect him to be truthful in a book?

[Trittydi]

I am a bit curious to know who it was that was beating the tar out of him with such regularity - as seems likely - indicated by his personality and glimpses of mental distress he seems to deal with as a result.
*

[MissDaphne]

Oh, heavens, Jason. Everytime I think of this title, I snort uncontrollably.
I do so appreciate your posts.
Anita

[djreedps]

Once a bully, always a bully.

Why doesn't Bill wait until after he grows up to write his memoir? I guess because then it would never be released.

[pkafin]

"Well, as it happens, one anagram for "A Bold Fresh Piece of Humanity" is "Shameful, Bona-Fide Hypocrite.­" This proves, once again, that the English language is a marvelous and mysterious thing."

That is awesome.

I was going to write about what a wonderful moment of discovery it was for whomever put in the work to figure this out. The I saw, from the link, that it was discovered via a computer program. That's not as beautiful as the "eureka!" moment I was envisioning. But it is still a supremely satisfying truth.

[luvobama]

How gross.

[TheIndependenceParty]

Did he say "A Bald Fleshy Piece of Homunculus"?

[TheEmptinessOfTruthiness]

OMG that's great!

[Bluedog12]

I've read a touching preview of Bill O' book wherin he writes "It was never easy for me. I was born a poor black child. I remember the days, sittin' on the porch with my family, singin' and dancin' down in Mississipp­i." The Jerk.

[JiminNC]

A Fresh Bold Piece of ...

He left off Warm and Steaming ...

[bentenrai]

Ha ha ha ha ha

[RumiSouth]

To quote Dorothy Parker, "this is not a book that should be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force."

[AurigaRa]

he' s right about one thing...th­ose sisters used the word bold a lot.

[ErnestineBass]

Is Bill O sure the good Sister didn't actually say "A Bald Pharisee of Calamity"?

A thick Irish brogue can oftimes be somewhat difficult to decipher.

heh heh

[DMcD]

As an Irishman , I can only hope this slimeball operates under an assumed stagename ----- it would be another unfair and sad page in Irish history if we had to carry the burden and shame of knowing this creature was in any way , associated with our proud heritage.

I'd sooner be akin to O'bama than to this hate-spewing degenerate.

[oncethere]

The sad thing and the thing for which we all pay is this: there were probably many others in Bill O's life, teachers and peers, who told him the same thing, in so many words----and he never listened or learned. Personality Disorders, like Bill, do not listen and learn; they are very difficult, if impossible, to treat, precisely because they take no responsibility for their behavior.