Fox's O'Reilly To Release Memoir This Fall That Is Already Quite Unintentionally Hilarious

Those of you who follow the goings-on of the Wingnut Welfare Book Club, or who are just tired of books that don't provide the sort of cognitive dissonance normally associated with getting whanged on the dome with a socket wrench, should mark their calendars and save this date: September 23, 2008. That is the day that Fox News' Bill O'Reilly will add the seventeen billionth entry to the overstuffed genre of quasi-celebrity memoirs with the release of his latest book, A Bold Fresh Piece of Humanity.

That's right. The book is actually called A Bold Fresh Piece of Humanity, which is practically begging for you commenters to mock it, at great length. According to the stub on Amazon.com, the title refers to an anecdote from O'Reilly's childhood:

In 1957, in the heart of the Eisenhower years, in the third grade classroom of Sister Mary Lurana in Saint Brigid's parochial school in Westbury, Long Island, was a mouthy, obstreperous kid by the name of William O'Reilly. Quite a handful he was, and so one day Sister Mary bent over him in exasperation in response to some piece of mischief and told him to his face, "William, you are a bold fresh piece of humanity." Little did she know that she was, early in his career as a troublemaker, defining the essence of Bill O'Reilly and providing him with the title of his brash and entertaining issues-based memoir.

Yes. LITTLE DID SHE KNOW! Of course, there's evidence to suggest that Sister Mary Lurana was actually very prescient, and was playing the long con. Why do I suggest this? Well, as it happens, one anagram for "A Bold Fresh Piece of Humanity" is "Shameful, Bona-Fide Hypocrite." This proves, once again, that the English language is a marvelous and mysterious thing.

Comments

[dct1999]

Isn't that a picture of Jerry Mathers of Leave it to Beaver? I

[Dannydel]

He & Hannity are so obviously the product of northeast catholic schooling, they could be poster children. I spent 6 years in one myself and still have flashbacks. Of course, knowing what we now know about the whole Catholic school experience, having that sort of scholastic pedigree doesn't really elevate their intellectual credentials much, rather, it helps to explain their stunted, right wing fruit loop reasoning. They'd better smarten up, or else I'll get my old teacher, Sister Mary Elephant, to smack them both upside their tiny little heads.

[Luigi53102]

So, you went to school with Tommy & Cheech, huh?

[naschkatze]

I have a brother-in-law who is hard of hearing in one ear because a Sister M. Elephant smacked him up the side of his head.

[CaptainZero]

I bold, fresh piece of...something. Something brown and faintly steaming...

[Barky]

The photo is a fresh indication that there is no telling how evolution and the genes manifests itself in adulthood. But then again Billo may have pilfered the picture from his class's yearbook.

[ashabot]

That title is totally absurd. What an idiot. He needs to get a new ghost writer.

[CitizenFace]

I'd describe him as more of a steaming pile than a fresh piece...

[dolphy]

That picture and title: Priceless (for comedians)

[BroMan]

Beavis: Huh, huh. huh... she said "fresh piece." huh, huh. j

[dolphy]

I didn't realize how many comedy writers we have until this thread. This is hilarious.

[Loculi]

This made me lol :)

[RyanK111]

"Bold Fresh Piece of Humanity" I believe those were also the words of Father McQuarters when he saw young Billo amblin' down the hall. Now it all makes sense...

[dawlishgal]

LOL.

[scornflakes]

Someone somewhere just has to have pictures of this guy in a dress. I mean really.

[macintoshsauce]

A Bold Fresh Piece of Bulls**t is more like it.

[ESaD]

I'd buy a book with a cover like that,,,, If i were a pedophile.

[AurigaRa]

amen!

[levibatgirl]

She was trying to tell him in her way that he had a tail and now he is an old guy with a tail who refuses to turn around and take a look at it.