Thought Process Flowchart: Dick Cheney

Although the 2008 GOP convention in St. Paul sounds like loads of fun--making myriad speeches trying to convince yourself and others that John McCain actually wants the job of president--several prominent Republicans have already said they're not planning to attend.

The list of no-shows is impressive--Alaska Senator Ted Stevens (busy remodeling his outhouse and sending out Internets), Maine Senator Susan Collins (busy reminding her constituents how much she hates being a Republican), and Congressman Bob Shaffer, who is running for Senate in Colordo (and busy taking down his son's racist Web page).

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