Airplane Creator Making Right-Wing "American Carol"

Reason:

I'm holding a palm card that was just given out at the Heritage Foundation to promote the new David Zucker film An American Carol. If I fill out the card, I can take one of four pledges, such as "Yes, I will send the trailer to my contacts" and "Yes, I want to be AN AMERICAN CAROLER or THEATER CAPTAIN." It's an induction to a movement, as the slogan on the card makes clear: "Finally, a movie for us."

By "us," of course, the filmmakers and promoters mean conservatives. Executive producer Myrna Sokoloff has put together a "pro-soldier, support our troops, pro-America" comedy, which Stephen Hayes previews in the new Weekly Standard. In it, filmmaker Michael Malone (Kevin "brother of Chris" Farley) and his organization MoveAlong.org are trying to repeal the Fourth of July when three angels--the Angel of Death, George S. Patton, and George Washington--come to him and convince him to change his ways.

The crowd at Heritage got to see a trailer and a few minutes of clips 24 hours before either of them will be generally released. I'm a huge fan of the Zucker-Leslie Nielsen canon, and not much of a fan of Zucker's ads for Republicans. The footage we saw floated somewhere in the middle of those two projects, quality-wise. Fat-assed Malone travels to Cuba, pledges to destroy America, and takes advantage of the invisibility granted by ghost status by grabbing a protestor's boobs. Bill O'Reilly appears out of nowhere to slap him. "I just like doing that," he says. Terrorists led by everybody's favorite pockmarked tough guy Robert Davi bitch that they're low on suicide bombers ("All the good ones are gone!") and all answer to the name Mohammed. In a scene that Sokoloff described, but didn't bring, Patton and his soldiers storm a courthouse that's about to remove the Ten Commandments and start opening fire on the people trying to stop them. "You can't shoot these people!" Malone says. "They're not people!" says Patton. "They're the ACLU!" At this point we see that the ACLU members are unkillable George Romero zombies.

Read the whole story: Reason

Comments

[yngcelt]

Looks hilarious! After so many Hollywood crapfests that tease, mock and spoof the right wing it's refreshing to see someone do the same thing to the lefties.
And from the responses so far on this board, it looks like leftists are a bunch of thin-skinned cry babies.

[Boboday555]

How sad...looks like now I'll have to add Mr. Zucker's name to the list of neo-con scum who won't be getting another penny of my movie going dollar!
So far it has Arnold, Fred Thomspon, Jon Voight, Mel Gibson, Patricia Richardson, Tom Selleck, Drew Cary, Kevin Farley, Kelsey Grammer, Robert Davi, Jon Voight, James Woods, Leslie Nielsen, Jillian Murray, Dennis Hopper, Kevin Sorbo, Travis Schuldt and Trace Adkins.

Wow...for a bunch of neo-con dirtbags who always seem to whine about Hollywood these 'actors' seem to make a pretty good living off it don't they?

[Boboday555]

God Damn It!
Now I have to burn Airplane, my Frasier episodes on CD, both National Treasure movies, even Easy Rider...which interestingly has the main charafter being shot and killed by the very inbred, knuckle dagging hillbillies he now choses to associates with.

Well, looks like this Zucker is another one of them Hollywood conservative elitists who won't be getting another penny of my movie going dollar.

Have fun with your Anti-Semitic republican pals Mr. Zucker!

[yngcelt]

"Anti-Semitic republican pals"?
Excuse me, but aren't you liberals, leftists and democrats the same ones who constantly accuse republicans of being in cahoots wtih Israel? So how can Republicans be "anti-semitic" when they are friends with Israel? If anyone is "anti-semitic" it's liberals!

[revko]

Surely he must be kidding.

Shirley?

[protagonia]

Always sad to see the price of a once great individual's soul reveled.

Mr Zucker's was whatever the neo's offered.

Hope it is worth it, Mr Zucker. You fans were the smart ones before. This new lot does not enjoy clever. They love brutal. Theirs is a Hellish world.

[izAriver]

Not good people. Too bad.

[protagonia]

There are a few of them.

Infinitely more good people though.

[lthuedk 1]

Zucker a Neo Con puppet? What a shocker! His ideology has been getting hammered by informed America and it has not only become unfashionable to attack defenders of the Constitution, but could be self-destructive.

Brazen Neo Conservatism will try anything and everything to bring down our democracy, particularly by attacking those who protect our rights from the trenches. Fascism, no matter how it's disguised -always- attacks freedom. America gets it. Party sheep don't.

http://www.light-to-dark.com/obama_confronts_the_corporation.html

Supporting the party that brought the Holocaust to Mesopotamia is more than just denial of the words, Never Again. It presents a deeply pathological conflict of morals.

[protagonia]

Mr Zucker,

You are just bringing this film out NOW?

When did you forget that the secret to comedy is TIMING???

Surely you must realize that - not that I'm trying to call you Shirley or anything...

[camera-obscura]

Wow, this could be a real classic of horrible cinema. I can see more people buying this from the dollar bin just to laugh at it than actually paying full ticket price to enjoy it.

Although I have to point out... George Romero zombies were not unkillable, unlike other zombies that moved after being dismembered, you just had to use a headshot to take out the brain :D

[protagonia]

PLAN 10 FROM OUTER SPACE?

[Bendersky]

The fact that anyone is still defending the recent actions of this country and our current president would be laughable if it wasn't so f*cking sad. Zucker has a right to his opinion and to make his god-awful movie, but after all this time it still boggles my mind that anyone could still be so blind to the criminality of this president and his gang. It strikes me as fear-based and willful ignorance. Too, I am equally surprised that people are still buying the whole "You're either for our president or your un-American" argument. It's not just fascistic and incredibly simplistic in it's logic, it's bloody embarassing. The rest of the planet can see what a complete crook W. is, and their collective minds are boggled that we (allegedly) re-elected the guy.

[camera-obscura]

The thing is they DO see how crooked and criminal the president is. That's why they have to focus on hating liberals, like in this movie. When they stop and think about the accomplishments of THEIR movement they're left with a blank. They didn't destroy Social Security, they didn't make bring oil prices down, they didn't end terrorism or crush Old Europe's influence in the world. All they have is a nation that doesn't trust them and a nominee who they've bashed for years.

So instead of fixing it... they just start jabbering about "Obama! Clinton! Pelosi! Michael Moore! Keith Olbermann! ACLU, NAACP, AARP! GRAAAAR!" ad nauseum.

[thereigoagain]

that's right, we need to jabber about Halliburton and Rove and Cheney and NRA and Christians and white people. C'mon, we have to jabber also!

[AFran90]

Once again, the line between right wing talking points and parodies of right wing talking points has been further blurred. How do you even tell which is which anymore?

[Birdman]

After reading the review I think it will bomb simply because it is too close to reality, after all I can picture republicans acting just like they do in this movie. Narrow minded egomaniacs on a rampage, just like the Bush administration and how many people really want to see a repeat of that. Well I have to admit that some southern good ole boys might like it but that is a pretty small portion of the world population.

[larry278]

The neo-con's are going too far in taking liberties with the Chas Dickens story, "An Xmas Carol". How do they plan to bypass Scrooge, Tiny Tim & the rest of Tiny Tim's family? The Heritage Foundation has forgotten this part of America's Xmas heritage. For shame, the ghost of Lionel Barrymore, who played scrooge on the radio, will haunt that whole crew. I can do Xmas without plum pudding but I must have mince meat pie. There are a few great recipies for making these holiday treats without meat & sugar. My Jewish, Hindu & Muslim friends rather liked the halal, kosher, sugar free plum pudding & mince pie.

[meanguy]

dickens never wrote "An Xmas Carol"...he DID, however, write "A Christmas Carol" in 1843...if you want to refer to the holiday as "xmas" for the sake of brevity or political correctness, that's entirely your right and your business...but please don't rewrite dickens...he deserves better

[gappedtoothgodwarrior]

The X is Xmas is derived from the Greek for Christ.

The X is Chi which along with Rho stands for Christos.

There is nothing politically correct about writing Xmas.

There is something culturally illiterate about thinking Xmas is political correctness however.

[Andman0121]

The ACLU has done more for America and Americans than you ever could you slimeball

[thereigoagain]

You're right and the ACLU has helped more slimeballs than that slimeball!
It's important that the ACLU defend all the slimeballs because if we don't defend slimeballs, there will not be anyone to defend the child pornographers and child molesters. We cannot allow the victims of crime to run around without being in fear.

[dfletcher]

Wow ignorance!

The ACLU helps people who have had their rights violated. They help NORMAL PEOPLE.

And yes, slimeball or POTUS, everyones rights are important.

[Birdman]

The real irony here is the Rethugs will tear the ACLU down until THEY need help, course once it is taken care of it is back to stabbing the ACLU in the back, go figure. I guess it is a situation of having your cake and eat it too. On the other hand I think it is more of Republican thy name is hypocrisy.

[Invasion14]

My favorite scene wasn’t mentioned about in the post but here it is from the script.

INT ABU GHRAIB PRISON NIGHT

Kelsey Grammar (George Washington) and Bill O'Reilly have brought Film Maker Michael Malone to witness their version of spreading democracy throughout the world.

Michael Malone
“ I don’t see how this is helping Americas image.”

The few lowly privates are having the naked Iraqi men form a human pyramid.

Michael Malone
“Most of these men are unemployed Iraqi civilians who have done nothing wrong.”

Kelsey Grammar
“I George Washington believe if they were innocent why would they be here in Iraq?”

Bill O'Reilly
“Yes this is just part of the birthing pains of a new nation oh I just can’t take it I’ve got to slap one of those fine brown asses.”

Bill O’Reilly breaks out of the god provided protective sphere of space travel to slap the rear of a thirty-year-old Iraqi schoolteacher who is in the middle of the pyramid. The young female private Lindsay England who at this point is not surprised by anything gives Bill O’Reilly a thumb up as the camera flashes. The senior officer that had just taking the photos smiles.

Senior Officer
“Nice job private, let’s put that thumbs up in all the pics.”

Fade out……