RNC Stalks Obama In Hawaii

So, I get these emails everyday from the Republican National Committee, keeping me abreast of their Great Works. Naturally, knowing how concerned the RNC is for my health and welfare, I look forward everyday to their email exhorting the capture of Osama bin Laden or a plan to solve the housing crisis. Someday, soon, I'm sure I'll get one! But for today, I'll have to make due with their periodic dispatches, reporting on the quotidian rituals of Barack Obama's vacation and all the un-American activities in which he's been participating.

Today's highlights include:

Kua 'Aina Sandwich Shop (1200 Ala Moana Blvd # 665, Honolulu, Hawaii): The Honolulu Advertiser reports "Obama ordered six half-pound cheeseburgers, eight third-pound cheeseburgers, 10 kids' burgers and 20 orders of fries" for a total of "just over $116" at Kua 'Aina yesterday.

Indeed! How dare Obama dine upon these elite foodstuffs! And what is this adding of "cheese" to "burger" that the RNC speaks of? Sounds like something they invented at the Harvard Law Review.

Magic Island (1201 Ala Moana Blvd, Honolulu, Hawaii): The Honolulu Star-Bulletin reports Obama enjoyed a picnic at Magic Island "under a banyan tree with about a dozen relatives and friends" yesterday.

What Strange and Terrible Muslim necromancy did Obama perform on his Magic Island with his sorcerer family on their picnic under the banyan tree?

Punahou School (1601 Punahou St, Honolulu, Hawaii): KGMB-TV reports "Obama spent about two hours on campus playing basketball with some of his old teammates" yesterday.

"Basket Balling," a game invented by the Reverend Jeremiah Wright, is a popular pastime of Uppity Negroes, the purpose of which is to score "Slam Dunks," thus mocking Medal of Honor winner George Tenet.

Higgins' Beach Estate (Kailua beach, Hawaii): Politico reports Barack Obama is renting an 11-bedroom, oceanfront vacation home owned by Jill Tate Higgins. "Higgins' house on Kailua beach, an hour's drive from Honolulu on the northern edge of Oahu, sits behind thick palm trees at the end of a private road. ... Property records offer the only glimpse: The $8 million house occupies 12,000-square feet and has 10.5 bathrooms, a pool and a Jacuzzi."

Yes. Obama resides as a guest at expensive homes with indoor plumbing, whereas rugged individualist John McCain lives off the land (and in ten mansions on various parts of the land, purchased through the sales of Cindy McCain's centerfolds in American Iron magazine).

I suppose, for BALANCE, you might want to know where John McCain will be spending his time? Well, this weekend, McCain will be found in the company of noted paupers Stephen Wynn and Sheldon Adelson, in the town of Aspen. Aspen, of course, is Colorado's version of Allentown, whose residents work long hours manufacturing snow in factories hit hard by NAFTA. Residents of Aspen lead a hardscrabble existence, which got 300% more hardscrabulous yesterday, when John McCain made them all citizens of the nation of Georgia.

RELATED: Guess Who's Coming to Dinner? McCain and Top Funder Of "Independent" Groups Meet Friday In Aspen [Accountable America]

Comments

[cassidynj]

This would be good for another "what's wrong with Obama" story from the news media.

I can see them fretting: why can't Obama get involved in more American activities, like John McCain : hazing, good Tailhook-type fun, cracking 4-letter jokes at the expense of women, etc?

[chronic]

Barack will be refreshed for the convention and road to election day.



Republicans better hope Mc Stain does not pass out!

[queotic]

""Basket Balling," a game invented by the Reverend Jeremiah Wright, is a popular pastime of Uppity Negroes, the purpose of which is to score "Slam Dunks," thus mocking Medal of Honor winner George Tenet."

Literally LOLing.

[normalkid0615]

Id like to personally thank the RNC for keeping me up to date with Obama. I was wondering how he was doing. Sounds like he is having a great time. Good for him! (NO SARCASM)

Obama 08

[JXJASON]

Very funny article. I liked the humor.

I would be nice for the RNC to tell us how John McCain is going to get us out of Iraq in September of 2008?

Also, how about passing a simple bill to stop the speculation in oil futures? McCain, Joe Lieberman and Arlen Specter were in PA this week and no one asked why Arlen Specter helped to defeat the Oil Speculation Bill last week in the Senate with a dumb amendment regarding OPEC.

Go To:

http://www.stopoilspeculationnow.com/

AND SIGN THE PETITION TO END THE SPECULATION IN THE COMMODITIES FUTURES MARKETS.

OBAMA 08

[bowloforanges]

This is nothing new, from May 2004

Speaking of Obama, he's the victim of a political stalking. His opponent, Republican Jack Ryan has hired a personal stalker to follow Obama everywhere he goes. The Chicago Sun Times reports:

For the past 10 days, U.S. Senate candidate Barack Obama hasn't been able to go to the bathroom or talk to his wife on his cell phone without having a camera-toting political gofer from his Republican rival filming a few feet away.

Republican Jack Ryan has assigned one of his campaign workers to record every movement and every word of the state senator while he is in public.

That means Justin Warfel, armed with a handheld Panasonic digital camcorder, follows Obama to the bathroom door and waits outside. It means Warfel follows Obama as he moves from meeting to meeting in the Capitol. And it means Warfel tails Obama when he drives to his campaign office.

"It's standard procedure to record public speeches and things like that," Obama told reporters as the bald, 20-something operative filmed away. "But to have someone who's literally following you a foot and a half away, everywhere you go, going into the restrooms, standing outside my office, sitting outside of my office asking my secretary where I am, seems to be getting a little carried away."

Warfel interrupted Obama several times with heckling questions, but wouldn't respond when reporters asked him about who he was and why he was filming Obama's every move.

[JScott]

Of course the RNC would never call them paparazzi, even tho that's what they are.

[cariintexas]

who did the RNC send to do their stalking, Ken Mehlman perhaps Ralph Reed, no not Ralphie, he's too busy with Mc Lobby.

[DaOne]

RNC has a massive man crush on our candidate.

[TrooAmerican]

Funny article.
Sounds like the RNC is Star Struck by Obama as well. They just cant help it. He is so charismatic and interesting that the RNC has sent its Best interns to go pick through the sewer lines to find out what Obama and his relatives ate.

The RNC is also changing its policy regarding recycling and is now recycling all trash items they find in Obama's trash cans and are keeping them at their HQ so each of them can roll around in it and experience the realistic odor and texture of Obama family refuse.

[Scarllatti]

Isn't that wonderful? I thought the GOP are averred to good things. I suggest they check Obama's sewage too.

[WFV]

It seems to me, with a candidate like they have, the RNC should be working on other things.

[londonrainbow]

MCSTRAIN had a whole week to shine, but he still DULL as hell!!!!!! ALthough O is away in vacation.

[londonrainbow]

Sorry, I meant ON vacation.

[manicallday]

This is ridiculous. We have no idea about Obama. Although there is evidence that Obama is shaky on civil rights, we will never know until it is too late. The Republicans are too busy stalking his vacation and the Democrats are too busy praising his name to ensure that we are adequately critical of him. No explanation of Jon Burge or why the architect of the sub-prime mortgage scheme is on his campaign. When this is mentioned everyone here just blows it off. Politics is not sport. Whoever is elected needs to be properly investigated and record scoured to ensure that we the people are not getting shamed. The fact that I haven't seen one critical article about Obama here just proves that we are setting ourselves up for buyers remorse. If Obama knew of Jon Burges actions then that needs to be brought out and discussed at length. Stop being fans and start getting informed.

[democracy1st]

the fact that he's the democratic nominee and all your wishes can't erase that should open your eyes. If you want McCain just go vote for him and if you're looking for angels in every position you're not going to find them in this campaign nor will you find them in any political campaign,its not possible.

[manicallday]

So it's is a matter of the lesser evil? Great, I will just stay home then and allow the fanatics to decide.

[londonrainbow]

I don't know what the hell u talking about. Just another manic Thursday.

Obama worked as a civil right lawyer for years. He did lots for the Chicago community.

Your point is?

[manicallday]

So what if he worked as a civil rights attorney. That really means nothing to me. As an attorney I know exactly how much weight to give that. Zero.

[barkanomics]

I love it! It's like Obama can't breathe without one of the Republican smear masters figuring out some reason that Obama breath is unAmerican, muslim, inexperienced, elitest, black powerist, too young, too good looking, too arrogant, too, too, too, TOO!

[marthlois]

It is 11:20 p.m. pacific time. ROFLMAO! This was a great way to end the day. Thanks Jason:)

[Anonani]

Please tell me this is satire!

[dicktracyson]

You really have to be ashamed of this party if you are member. Sending a person this email insults their intelligence to the nth degree. Like children throwing stones at the playground with zero sense of consequences. And to think that these people actually have solutions to the monumental problems this nation is facing is flat out INSANITY.