POLITICS
10/26/2008 05:12 am ET Updated May 25, 2011

Grandstanding For Wall Street: How They Covered It

The important work of socializing all the risk, ever, and placing it on the burden of the taxpayers entered the all-important Empty Pageantry Stage that John McCain requested President George W. Bush throw at the White House, with Barack Obama and selected members of the Congressional leadership. White House reporters managed to capture the Opening Ceremonies, which featured no crazy Chinese acrobats or wackadoo music, opting instead for a brief statement from the president that combined words such as "work" and "crisis" and "economy" and "bipartisan." The whole thing lasted about a minute and fifteen seconds, which is about twice as long as most recent Sarah Palin avails, and did feature the priceless coda of John McCain sitting at the table, grinning like an idiot.

[WATCH.]

Afterwards, your heroic cable newsmen had to fill some airtime, so here's what happened. CNN reported on reporters, describing the Charlie Foxtrot that ensued when the White House Press Corps ended up in the same space as the pool reporters for McCain and Obama. Fox News went to Karl Rove for analysis, and ended up getting ruminations like, "You see those chairs there? That's where White House advisors sit!" MSNBC showed a commercial for GEICO, for the win.

Jonathan Martin is reporting that John McCain will be giving a round of interviews to all three networks after the pomp and circumstance at the White House is concluded. It's all a part of McCain's Non-Suspension Suspension Pretension, which seems to be their last means of ensuring that nobody ever watches Sarah Palin on teevee ever again.