California Candidate Launches Bizarre, Phone-Sex Robocall

Zane Starkewolf is a ninth-level elven warrior from Dungeons and Dragons and self-professed "Green Republican" who's running against Mike Thompson in California's First District, and he's spent his Monday morning attempting to explain a robocall his campaign sent out over the weekend. Here's Starkewolf's statement on the matter:

I want to officially address the topic of the phone call that went out today from my campaign to individuals in District One. I acknowledge that the idea behind the ad, and indeed the execution of the call, was not the safe route to take. And if my run for office was simply for personal gain, I would not have taken a risk. But the content and the facts within the message were there and need to be discussed. Hopefully this call opens up the forum for discussion on the issues and on the representation which is so essential to our system.

What we are discussing today is the lack of alignment in representation in this district. Things are stagnant in Washington and accountability for one's actions and to one's district is severely lacking. I take the credit or the blame for the statement that went out today. The unpaid staffer who recorded and submitted the message may have been a little overly enthusiastic in the delivery, but I believe it is good to get enthusiasm back into politics.

As it turns out, the "overly enthusiastic" staffer basically thought the best way to get the "enthusiasm back into politics" was to put all of that enthusiasm into the pants of voters, because the robocall she sent out is basically a phone sex call.

"Mike Thompson has been a baaaaaad boy. We all said no to the bailout, but Thompson backed Bush. Just like he did with the Patriot act, uhhhhhh, vote YESSSSSSSSS! for Zane."

You can listen to this nonsense here.

"Let's think outside the box, let's not be scared, let's talk about the issues that really matter," says Starkewolf, who sadly, doesn't add, "And let's have this discussion whilst on the verge of explosive orgasms, together."

Comments

[TrooAmerican]

09:44 AM on 10/28/2008

I'd be more apt to listen to a call like that than the nasty obnoxious attack ads McCain is sending out.

[MsCanadian]

11:30 PM on 10/27/2008

Another Republican nutcase! Good Lord! I will be glad to see the end of this stupidity!

[Jingo]

10:04 PM on 10/27/2008

It was an honest mistake. The agency that recorded the call thought it would be targeting District 30 which includes the west end of the San Fernando Valley. The woman's voice on the call sounds perfectly normal in the porn capital of the world.

[brokerthanu]

09:09 PM on 10/27/2008

I love the way these guys keep shooting themselves in the foot. And WTF is a green Republican? The terms cancel each other out.

[ZaneStarkewolf]

10:12 PM on 10/27/2008

I was raised on a hippy commune in Oregon, I have been apart of the enviromental movement my entire life, and have seen how the democrats have failed to provide clean renewable energy over the past 30 years.

Why have the democrats failed to provide clean energy?

Because they didnt have bipartisan support in Congress. So if we are going to actually make a change and have clean renewable energy, then we need to get republicans involved. I am a candidate that will help "sway" republican ideals towards clean eregy sources such as wind and solar. I do not support "clean" coal, as it is not clean nor renewable.

[coastalgal]

08:52 PM on 10/27/2008

Got this call on my machine last night--played it twice--didn't get it until I read
Huff Post today. O geez...there goes my unlisted #--
Ha Ha----- wotta maroon!

[ZaneStarkewolf]

10:03 PM on 10/27/2008

I got your phone number from a public list of registered voters. Anyone can goto their local county elections office and pay a small fee for addresses and phone numbers of voters.

As to the "wotta maroon" comment...at least I didnt pay for an unlisted phone number and then write it on my voter registration card.

/i kid...i kid

[coastalgal]

04:58 PM on 10/28/2008

Nor did I--I've been registered looooooong before tel #'s were required. Probably before you were born, sonny.

[ZaneStarkewolf]

08:28 PM on 10/27/2008

I take full responsibility for the message. I wrote the script, but I wasnt there for the "creative" interpretation of the text and never got to approve it. The message was risqué and inappropriate for some age groups.

That being said, we all know politics are dirty. This is just putting the "Dirty" into Dirty Politics.

I hope this will be an opportunity for people to look beyond being offended by a political ad, and actually look at the votes of your congressmen. My opponent a likes to pretend he is a liberal and conservative at the same time. Meanwhile, he consistently votes to violate our constitution, support the military industrial-complex, and bankrupt our country with corporate welfare. While everyone is excited about the presidential campaign, it is the local elections that will have an impact on our daily lives.

Congressman Mike Thompson voted in favor of the $700 billion bailout, even after 9 out of 10 people ask him to vote NO. He has voted for the patriot act and many other Bush backed bills. People are more offended by a sexy voice than the fact that congress just stole $3000 out of everyone's pocket to bailout corporate executives.

I would like to add that I am offended by the article stating that I am "ninth-level eleven warrior from Dungeons and Dragons", as if I were some kid of geek or something...

/Level 40 Human Paladin WoW....

[pyrojen]

03:29 AM on 10/29/2008

Hey Zane -
I have this funny feeling I would vote for you if I could. Good point about a sexy voice actually being MUCH less offensive than the bailout mess or the constitution-bashing "Patriot" Act. Not to mention that your robocalls don't distort the truth the way the "Obama buddies around with terrorists" robocalls do.
Not a WoW fan, bu I do have a thing for geeks...

[loislane1939]

05:10 AM on 10/29/2008

I commend you for taking responsibility for something that happened on your campaign instead of farming the blame off onto someone else when it's your show. You have my regard for that.

[JeanPaulSatire]

07:13 PM on 10/27/2008

C'mon, people get a grip!

While this is a pretty ineffective robocall, it's of much higher morality than the hatred and lies spewed on behalf of Blinky and Winky.

[merle7]

08:02 PM on 10/27/2008

This is so cute and true Mcain blinks and Palin winks I like it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[obmark]

06:37 PM on 10/27/2008

I just donated.

http://www.mikethompsonforcongress.com/

[JeanPaulSatire]

07:14 PM on 10/27/2008

You mean you donated MONEY -- right??

[nuclearmonkeys]

07:37 PM on 10/27/2008

I live in CA District 1. Thompson has this in the bag and will win with 60%+ so don't worry.

[obmark]

07:43 PM on 10/28/2008

You mean they don't take kidneys?

[ndngrrl71]

05:39 PM on 10/27/2008

This guy is the reason why California is a Blue State. We don't tolerate these idiots!.
We've learned our lesson with our Republican Governor. I doubt we'll ever do that again.

[wndrwrthg]

06:34 PM on 10/27/2008

Oh you of starry eyes and pie in the sky, of course we will do it again. Hell, we gave the world raygun. Most californians are easily led by glitzy shows and shiney objects. Unless those of us who are not so easily distracted, work hard to see that it does not reaccure, it will. Look at prop, 8 right now, religious demagoguery is pushing it to where it may win.

[MadOzbo]

07:19 PM on 10/27/2008

Ummmmm...WHICH Republican Govenor did you learn this from, again?
Seems like California has a Republican Govenor pretty regularly, so I'm not sure when you learned this lesson, or how long the learning lasted...

[linzy]

04:55 PM on 10/27/2008

I really do hope Keith O. or Rachel (if she can stand it) will air this. It actually is funny because it is so lame.

[HHarvey]

04:51 PM on 10/27/2008

LOL! I live in this district and thank god I have caller i.d. He's not a republican, he's from the green party. I think he thought it would get people's attention, poor decision especially if my six year old decided to answer the phone.

[ThirdSection]

04:47 PM on 10/27/2008

Perhaps we have just witnessed a grand new innovation in the long, hard process of political campaigning

:-)

[Keith52]

04:44 PM on 10/27/2008

Are the Republicans on self destruct? There must be an alignment of the planets or something in the water. It is all just too weird.

[broezekiel]

04:42 PM on 10/27/2008

Zane Starkwolf?????? Starkwolf??????? OMG you;ve got to be kidding, right????

[hooger158]

04:42 PM on 10/27/2008

I know this is un PC, but does anyone else get the feeling that the unpaid staffer is a too-big-to-wear-midriff-bearing-elf-costume-but-it's-a-geek-convention-so-they-will-think-I'm-hot type?

[ZaneStarkewolf]

10:16 PM on 10/27/2008

Actually, shes very hot. I cant say who it is, because Im taking responsibility for the message. But I can assure you she is good looking. I dont even stand a chance with her.

/drool

[TrooAmerican]

09:43 AM on 10/28/2008

ahahahaa good one!

[coastalgal]

05:59 PM on 11/02/2008

Say--aren't you running a campaign???
Get off the post and on the trail, drooly.