California Candidate Launches Bizarre, Phone-Sex Robocall

Zane Starkewolf is a ninth-level elven warrior from Dungeons and Dragons and self-professed "Green Republican" who's running against Mike Thompson in California's First District, and he's spent his Monday morning attempting to explain a robocall his campaign sent out over the weekend. Here's Starkewolf's statement on the matter:

I want to officially address the topic of the phone call that went out today from my campaign to individuals in District One. I acknowledge that the idea behind the ad, and indeed the execution of the call, was not the safe route to take. And if my run for office was simply for personal gain, I would not have taken a risk. But the content and the facts within the message were there and need to be discussed. Hopefully this call opens up the forum for discussion on the issues and on the representation which is so essential to our system.

What we are discussing today is the lack of alignment in representation in this district. Things are stagnant in Washington and accountability for one's actions and to one's district is severely lacking. I take the credit or the blame for the statement that went out today. The unpaid staffer who recorded and submitted the message may have been a little overly enthusiastic in the delivery, but I believe it is good to get enthusiasm back into politics.

As it turns out, the "overly enthusiastic" staffer basically thought the best way to get the "enthusiasm back into politics" was to put all of that enthusiasm into the pants of voters, because the robocall she sent out is basically a phone sex call.

"Mike Thompson has been a baaaaaad boy. We all said no to the bailout, but Thompson backed Bush. Just like he did with the Patriot act, uhhhhhh, vote YESSSSSSSSS! for Zane."

You can listen to this nonsense here.

"Let's think outside the box, let's not be scared, let's talk about the issues that really matter," says Starkewolf, who sadly, doesn't add, "And let's have this discussion whilst on the verge of explosive orgasms, together."

Comments

[TrooAmerican]

I'd be more apt to listen to a call like that than the nasty obnoxious attack ads McCain is sending out.

[MsCanadian]

Another Republican nutcase! Good Lord! I will be glad to see the end of this stupidity!

[Jingo]

It was an honest mistake. The agency that recorded the call thought it would be targeting District 30 which includes the west end of the San Fernando Valley. The woman's voice on the call sounds perfectly normal in the porn capital of the world.

[brokerthanu]

I love the way these guys keep shooting themselves in the foot. And WTF is a green Republican? The terms cancel each other out.

[ZaneStarkewolf]

I was raised on a hippy commune in Oregon, I have been apart of the enviromental movement my entire life, and have seen how the democrats have failed to provide clean renewable energy over the past 30 years.

Why have the democrats failed to provide clean energy?

Because they didnt have bipartisan support in Congress. So if we are going to actually make a change and have clean renewable energy, then we need to get republicans involved. I am a candidate that will help "sway" republican ideals towards clean eregy sources such as wind and solar. I do not support "clean" coal, as it is not clean nor renewable.

[coastalgal]

Got this call on my machine last night--played it twice--didn't get it until I read
Huff Post today. O geez...there goes my unlisted #--
Ha Ha----- wotta maroon!

[ZaneStarkewolf]

I got your phone number from a public list of registered voters. Anyone can goto their local county elections office and pay a small fee for addresses and phone numbers of voters.

As to the "wotta maroon" comment...at least I didnt pay for an unlisted phone number and then write it on my voter registration card.

/i kid...i kid

[coastalgal]

Nor did I--I've been registered looooooong before tel #'s were required. Probably before you were born, sonny.

[ZaneStarkewolf]

I take full responsibility for the message. I wrote the script, but I wasnt there for the "creative" interpretation of the text and never got to approve it. The message was risqué and inappropriate for some age groups.

That being said, we all know politics are dirty. This is just putting the "Dirty" into Dirty Politics.

I hope this will be an opportunity for people to look beyond being offended by a political ad, and actually look at the votes of your congressmen. My opponent a likes to pretend he is a liberal and conservative at the same time. Meanwhile, he consistently votes to violate our constitution, support the military industrial-complex, and bankrupt our country with corporate welfare. While everyone is excited about the presidential campaign, it is the local elections that will have an impact on our daily lives.

Congressman Mike Thompson voted in favor of the $700 billion bailout, even after 9 out of 10 people ask him to vote NO. He has voted for the patriot act and many other Bush backed bills. People are more offended by a sexy voice than the fact that congress just stole $3000 out of everyone's pocket to bailout corporate executives.

I would like to add that I am offended by the article stating that I am "ninth-level eleven warrior from Dungeons and Dragons", as if I were some kid of geek or something...

/Level 40 Human Paladin WoW....

[pyrojen]

Hey Zane -
I have this funny feeling I would vote for you if I could. Good point about a sexy voice actually being MUCH less offensive than the bailout mess or the constitution-bashing "Patriot" Act. Not to mention that your robocalls don't distort the truth the way the "Obama buddies around with terrorists" robocalls do.
Not a WoW fan, bu I do have a thing for geeks...

[loislane1939]

I commend you for taking responsibility for something that happened on your campaign instead of farming the blame off onto someone else when it's your show. You have my regard for that.

[IdeasAsOpiates]

I am against the patriot act (some provisions ok, but on whole a massive giveaway of rights inspired by fear) and the bailout (pressure for quick profits by todays investors, force bad decisions by supposedly conservative companies, not to mention pure greed, plus a few doses of forgetting 'if its too good to be true...it likely is'). We are free to make our own decisions (wise or not). Then we are free to suffer the consequences...don't see anyone saying they will lower my loan amount because I had to buy in competition with folks that had no ability to actually pay their loans. Responsible people are getting hosed by this. Period.

But, I am supposed to trust your judgment instead?? With that crap I hung up on half way through? Its not thinking outside the box..its pandering to lowest common denominator at best, just plain stupid at worst. If you thought, for even a minute, that call was a good idea, please leave politics now. I can't trust your judgment any more than I can your opponent.

When I heard that call, I tried to decide - is the for real or is your opponent putting out a fake call to use against you. Bummer - it wasn't your opponent.

Crap like that will undercut any positions you take in the future. And to think - you would have had my vote

[ZaneStarkewolf]

You obviously can see how devastating this corporate welfare bailout is. That combined with Mike Thompson votes on the Patriot Act, FISA, defense authorizations, national missile defense....

Why is sensuality/sexuality the lowest common detonator? You almost sound like a right wing Christian conservative. While you say you hung up, if you give me your phone number or name, I can look up how long you actually listened.

This was perhaps the most effective robocall in the history of robocalls, in that almost everyone (except for you, supposedly...) listened to the entire message. This is unheard of when everyone in this country is being blasted by robocalls that most everyone hangs up on. The content of the message is far too important to be clouded by judgment of its risqué nature. Congressional races are largely ignored, overshadowed by the presidential race. Congress and their votes are extremely important for the future of America.

And to think - you would rather vote for someone who voted to illegally tap your phone line as opposed to someone who left you a unique risqué voice message.

[JeanPaulSatire]

C'mon, people get a grip!

While this is a pretty ineffective robocall, it's of much higher morality than the hatred and lies spewed on behalf of Blinky and Winky.

[merle7]

This is so cute and true Mcain blinks and Palin winks I like it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[obmark]

I just donated.

http://www.mikethompsonforcongress.com/

[JeanPaulSatire]

You mean you donated MONEY -- right??

[nuclearmonkeys]

I live in CA District 1. Thompson has this in the bag and will win with 60%+ so don't worry.

[obmark]

You mean they don't take kidneys?

[ndngrrl71]

This guy is the reason why California is a Blue State. We don't tolerate these idiots!.
We've learned our lesson with our Republican Governor. I doubt we'll ever do that again.

[wndrwrthg]

Oh you of starry eyes and pie in the sky, of course we will do it again. Hell, we gave the world raygun. Most californians are easily led by glitzy shows and shiney objects. Unless those of us who are not so easily distracted, work hard to see that it does not reaccure, it will. Look at prop, 8 right now, religious demagoguery is pushing it to where it may win.

[MadOzbo]

Ummmmm...WHICH Republican Govenor did you learn this from, again?
Seems like California has a Republican Govenor pretty regularly, so I'm not sure when you learned this lesson, or how long the learning lasted...

[motherfather]

Im sorry, but you guys elected the TERMINATOR to your highest state office. AHHNOLD, the dude barely speaks English and he is dumb. AND I BLAME U FOR REAGAN!!! Its all love but lets be real.

[linzy]

I really do hope Keith O. or Rachel (if she can stand it) will air this. It actually is funny because it is so lame.

[HHarvey]

LOL! I live in this district and thank god I have caller i.d. He's not a republican, he's from the green party. I think he thought it would get people's attention, poor decision especially if my six year old decided to answer the phone.

[ThirdSection]

Perhaps we have just witnessed a grand new innovation in the long, hard process of political campaigning

:-)

[Keith52]

Are the Republicans on self destruct? There must be an alignment of the planets or something in the water. It is all just too weird.

[broezekiel]

Zane Starkwolf?????? Starkwolf??????? OMG you;ve got to be kidding, right????

[hooger158]

I know this is un PC, but does anyone else get the feeling that the unpaid staffer is a too-big-to-wear-midriff-bearing-elf-costume-but-it's-a-geek-convention-so-they-will-think-I'm-hot type?

[ZaneStarkewolf]

Actually, shes very hot. I cant say who it is, because Im taking responsibility for the message. But I can assure you she is good looking. I dont even stand a chance with her.

/drool

[TrooAmerican]

ahahahaa good one!

[coastalgal]

Say--aren't you running a campaign???
Get off the post and on the trail, drooly.