Joe The Plumber Launches Website, Will Ruin Websites Forever

No, my friends, it has not escaped my attention that Samuel J. Wurzelbacher - also known by his idio(t)syncratic alias "Joe the Plumber" - has launched himself a website. Who will save the people from Toledo, Ohio from drowning in their own septic backwash if Joe is not there, with the plumbing, because he's blinging out his phat site with animated .GIFs? All Ohio will pray for a New New Deal, to stem the tide of wastewater.

But what's not to like about this website? It's 1996 design aesthetic takes me right back to my days of working at the James Branch Cabell Library at Virginia Commonwealth University, where I spent my days as a reference desk librarian, frantically steering students away from websites because they were, at that time, mostly terrible, and anyway, seriously: READ A BOOK MAYBE TO LEARN ABOUT SEASHELLS. Ahh, the sweet nostalgia of a bygone time when Samuel Wurzelbacher may have actually been doing some plumbing, instead of proferring his always hastily retracted opinions about everything!

We especially love the whole business model, where a "We Are Joe" Membership is free, for the poor people, and a "FREEDOM" Membership costs you $14.95 a year. You know what they say, after all: FREEDOM ISN't FREE. (Actuaries place the cost of freedom at $18.99/year, so this is a relatively good deal.)

And what do you get for your paid membership? Among other things, you get "a monthly subscription to Joe's blog, where he can share the latest on the fight for preserving Americas freedoms." Because that's what everyone does! Charge money to read blogs! Naturally, I'm skeptical that this will work, but if Joe goes out and hires the former staff of Radar Online, I'm totally bookmarking it.

Just as an added tidbit of information, TitotheBuilder.com is, surprisingly, still available. Sheesh, some visionary that guy turned out to be.

Comments

[expired]

He reminds me of a truck driving, beer swilling, shotgun toating, rde neck who whoops and hollers after a few beers and screams to his boys, let's go git us some ngrs. Yee ha!!

[dynagirl7371]

OK, I just visited his website and I puked in my mouth a little bit. Sure Joe, I'd love to buy a piece of Joe merchandise. Maybe you could raise enough money to actually become a plumber.
You are shameless, man.

[GEAH]

Those damn pesky citizens. How dare they question their superiors.

Let's have the Democrats in government illegally investigate this troublemaker who dared to speak up.

[nvr2late]

He represents the Repub party? Yep! And they want to know what's wrong with their party? Also, I've always thought he was a McCain plant at that Obama rally.

[WLA]

Who in the world would give a rat's posterior what this nincompoop has to say about anything?

[ObjectiveRealist]

http://www.joethefakeplumber.com/

[bubbuh]

"Because that's what everyone does! Charge money to read blogs! Naturally, I'm skeptical that this will work..."

But, it's a SPECIAL retractable blog!

[firewmn]

**
Holy Cow... what a thrid rate website.. Gown up Joe, pay your taxes like the rest of us hard working Americans and take your part in helping America seriously. You are one the last few seconds of your 15 minutes..

I do have a question for Joe, - Has John McCain called you lately?

seriously doubt it.

[Cambridge9]

I'm wondering how come he claims to be a plumber when, really, he's such a salesman. He could probably have been a good salesman - if only he believed an the product more than he believed in his own ego.. He reminds me of a con artist who takes advantage of little old ladies. I would love to see him, under oath, trying to prove that he's more than just an OPPORTUNIST.

It amazes me how many folks are gullible enough to take him seriously!

[sole]

Nice website, ha! Terrible design, layout and coding errors throughout. As his publisher apparently runs the site, the book will be nothing but garbage seeing as they can't even spell or use proper grammar. Read the first sentence under the We The People Link...pathetic. This site parallels what went wrong during the failed Republican attempt at the Presidency. Unorganized, riddled with mistakes and WAY OFF MESSAGE. Like most of the people that may flock to this pathetic site out of blind allegiance, you need to start over.

[StillAmused]

There are few things more laughable than a confident dullard.

[Colmore]

Like the one in the White House?THAT joke ended a thousand deaths, jobs ago.

[Tommygun2146]

Maybe now he'll pay his taxes.

[Herkybird]

Mebbe Ohio is lenient towards it's non-filers but the IRS is not! And in this joker deserves everything he gets!

[pjlawrence81]

Sooooo...whatever happened to that business he was about to buy and make $250,000 and have his wealth spread around by socialists and have his American Dream crushed? He doesn't seem too concerned about that now, does he?

[Herkybird]

Not since the Ohio Dept of Revenue and the IRS now know where he lives! LOL

[majorteddy]

My prediction is that within an outside date of two years, Joe the Plumber will no longer have his old job and everything he touches turns to crap. He will have a substance abuse problem and be in trouble with the law and neither John McCain or Sarah Palin will speak to him.So much for the American Dream.

[sloreader]

LOL... He'll be allright though. After all, that big can of drain cleaner he will have left from his plumbing days will be great for cutting his "product" down and raising his profit margin to an "acceptable" level.

[AlindaFaye2000]

You are so right.

[majorteddy]

Ah, the two best things that John McCain's presidential run gave the country---Joe the Plumber and Sarah Palin. Now I know why they call it a depression.

[sloreader]

And I thought "Dumb and Dumber" was only make believe movie stuff! Silly me.