Jim Cramer: Make Me The Next SEC Chairman

On CNBC this evening, "Mad Money" host Jim Cramer offered Obama a novel option for turning around the US economy: making Jim Cramer his next SEC Chairman. Cramer, insisting it wasn't his "usual megalomania talking," said that Obama would be smart to give him the job.

Read a partial transcript below.

DO YOU WANT THE MARKET TO BECOME A SAFE PLACE TO INVEST AGAIN? A PLACE WHERE THE PLAYING FIELD BETWEEN THE LONGS, REGULAR INVESTORS LIKE YOURSELF, AND THE SHORTS OFTEN HEDGE FUNDS, WILLING TO DESTROY GOOD COMPANIES IN ORDER TO TURN A PROFIT?

DO YOU WANT THAT? DO YOU WANT A LEVEL PLAYING FIELD? THEN I KNOW WHAT YOU WANT. I KNOW WHO YOU WANT. YOU WANT JAMES J. CRAMER TO BE YOUR NEXT SEC CHAIRMAN. [holds up sign Cramer for SEC chairman with head shot] THAT'S RIGHT.THROWING THE HAT IN THE RING. AS OF NOW, I'M FORMALLY PUTTING MYSELF FORWARD FOR THE JOB OF SEC CHAIR AND I WANT IT. AND FRANKLY, OBAMA WILL BE SMART TO GIVE IT TO ME. THIS ISN'T JUST MY USUAL MEGALAMANIA TALKING. I DON'T MEAN TO BRAG, BUT LOOK, LET'S TAKE A LOOK AT MY RESUME [shows giant prop resume]

I'M A LAWYER BY TRAINING -- I SOUND LIKE AN AD RIGHT -- A STOCK JOCK, A FORMER HEDGE FUND MANAGER, A GUY WHO KNOWS THE TRICKS AND HAS SEEN OTHERS DO THEM. ALTHOUGH TO BE VERY CLEAR, I NEVER DID ANYTHING ILLEGAL OR EVEN CLOSE TO UNETHICAL, BECAUSE IN THE END, I AM A GOODY TWO SHOES AND I ACTUALLY HAVE A NEW PAIR OF GOOODY TWO SHOES.

BUT I HAVE SEEN OTHER MONEY MANAGERS DO THINGS THAT WE ONCE STOPPED AND I KNOW HOW TO DETECT THEM. WOW, HEY LISTEN, HE WENT TO HARVARD, HE MUST BE REALLY SMART.

AS FDR SAID WHEN HE APPOINTED JOE KENNEDY TO RUN THE SEC, IT TAKES A FOX TO GUARD THE HEN HOUSE. THE MARKET NEEDS OBAMA TO DECLARE WHO HE WANTS TO RUN FOR THE SEC.

HE HAS GOT TO PICK HIM SOON. HE BETTER START VETTING ME AND MY COMPETITION. BECAUSE WE NEED CHRIS COX OUT OF THERE ASAP! ON A RAIL! WE'VE GOT TO UNDO COX'S LEGACY QUICKLY.A LEGACY OF SUBVERTING EVERYTHING THAT WAS PUT IN PLACE TO MAKE THE MARKET SAFE FOR INDIVIDUAL INVESTORS, AND EMPOWERING -- THIS IS WHAT HE DID -- EMPOWERING SHORT SELLERS TO CREATE FEAR AND DESTRUCTION.

Comments

[bandillero]

Is the all CAPs supposed to signify Cramer screaming?

[karinova]

I know, right? That was the first thing I thought, too.
But where are the sound effects from his giant board o' buttons?!

[IDIOTA]

Let me try this again:

Jim Cramer is a living hoax; he cannot be trusted; he dissembles loudly.

[neocon6716]

Jim Cramer has lost more people money than anybody in the History of Wall Street!

Let's see, JIm said buy Google at 800. good call Jimmy Boy. Oh, and Buy GS at 100, how's that working out for you. And my all time favorite Jim Cramer pick. But SIRI at 2.75, cause after the merger with XM Radio, it's going to double and should be at least $4.00 a share. Siri is now around 18 cents a share!

Jim Cramer, worst stock picker IN THE WORLD!

[Rule Of Law]

Don't we have enough clowns in govt. already?

[RJII]

No thank you.

[AmandaBC]

This guy's a kook. It's people like him that created the problem in the first place. I believe it's called mass hysteria..­.

[Archivist1000]

What do you know about it??? Not much, judging from your comment.

[Choicelady]

Your track record is utterly unimpressive. You did not see any of this coming when a lot of us out here did - and have done so for over 30 years of increasing worry and concern. Since you blew it, you would hardly be our choice!

[vietveter]

JIM,
Do a reality check

YOU are not even CLOSE to being

QUALIFIED.

[emstrem]

Cramer would be one of the short list of wise people for the job. He has been clamoring about the markets being in need of regulation for some time now, AND he is the ONLY one who apologized for recommending one of those banks that just filed Chapter 11. d00d might be over the top, but he does have some integrity.

I have too many Berkshire Hathaway class B stock for Warren Buffett to become SEC chairman. I'd hate for my boy Charlie to start running the company...­I'm selfish that way I guess. :)

[GerryS]

howz about Suze Orman-

{note the sarcasm}

[jalowe1957]

Jim Cramer: A loudmouthed exhibitionist a strip-search away from being full-blown monty.

[curiousasheck]

There's a fool and his money born every minute

http://www.capitalstool.com/forums/index.php?act=attach&type=post&id=107161

[Turtleposer]

Why can't we have both--why not Jimmy Buffet?

[vcalzone]

We already bailed out the rum industry, you want to give the tequila people special treatment too?

Actually, you might have a point.

[ErnestineBass]

ROFL!!! Good catch.

[Turtleposer]

Guilty as charged. Now that I know that I might be laid off in January, I want to keep Tequila prices down, given that I'm going to be drowning my sorrows in it.

[kstuff]

At least he understands how the system works. That's an improvemen­t...

[vcalzone]

Get Warren Buffet to do it. Watch the markets skyrocket immediately after.