Per Tradition, Ex-Presidents Watch Obamas Christen White House Bed

The Onion:

WASHINGTON--Honoring one of the longest-standing rituals in American history, former presidents Jimmy Carter, George H.W. Bush, Bill Clinton, and George W. Bush assembled in the nation's capital last week to witness the new first couple's christening of the White House bed. "Today, the torch is passed unto a new generation," ex-president Carter said while ceremoniously peering through the Jefferson Blinds. "On this most hallowed eve, we commemorate our forebears, from General Washington to Ford, each of them a testament to fortitude, self-sacrifice, and endurance. Please pass the binoculars." Sources said the service lasted approximately 20 minutes from start to finish, and was the most exciting bedchamber christening since Frank Sinatra filled in for Ronald Reagan.

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