San Francisco Man In Massive "Wife Swap" Fallout (VIDEO)

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AP/YouTube   |   February 21, 2009 09:58 AM

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Stephen Fowler

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SAN FRANCISCO - It's safe to say Stephen Fowler probably wishes he never appeared on "Wife Swap."

Fowler's stint on the ABC reality show last month, in which he called a rural Missouri woman spending two weeks in his San Francisco home stupid and simple, has made him famous in the worst way.

His performance has inspired a Web site, StephenFowlerSucks.com, a Facebook group, "I Can not Stand Stephen Fowler from `Wife Swap,'" and public condemnation by his own wife, who on her blog urged him to get professional help.

What has generated such wrath is Fowler's condescending treatment of Gayla Long, a mother of four from rural Missouri whose family likes fast food and paintball. In wince-producing remarks, Fowler, who is British, wrote off middle America with such pronouncements as "Your two languages seem to be bad English and redneck."

Three weeks later, Fowler's "Wife Swap" antics are still a YouTube sensation, with at least 10 postings from the show's Jan. 30 episode displayed on the Web site, most with headings such as "ridiculous elitist" and "elitists gone wild."

Last week, Yahoo posted a clip of the show on its site under the heading "Husbands Behaving Badly." Each new posting or story generates thousands of views and hundreds of galled comments.

Fowler, an environmental entrepreneur who develops biofuels, apologized in a statement posted on his wife's blog for behaving "like a complete jerk" and said he has resigned from the boards of two nonprofit corporations for reflecting badly on the organizations.

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Some news outlets have reported that Fowler says he has received death threats. Neither Fowler nor his wife, Renee Stephens, could be reached to confirm the reports.

"Wife Swap" is a social experiment of sorts in which wives from two very different families exchange lives for two weeks.

Stephens, a self-described life coach and "destination coach" (who says her goal is "to eradicate weight struggles from the planet") joined Long's husband, Alan, the mayor of a town of 55 residents in Missouri.

Fowler, wearing T-shirts that say "Go Solar," "Tree Hugger" and "Sustainability," hosted Gayla Long with his young son and daughter. At one point, as Long read a list of rules for the Fowler family, Fowler told her, "I didn't know you could read." When Long challenged Fowler for acting like he was better than her, he responded: "I probably make more in a week than you make in a year."

At the end of the visit, he said, "God, that woman is the most stupid woman I've ever met in my life."

Friends quoted anonymously in the San Francisco Chronicle said Fowler told them he was instructed to ham it up by "Wife Swap's" producers. His performance evoked a stereotype of the San Francisco elitist liberal -- the tree-hugging do-gooder who acts morally superior while putting down others.

The Fowlers, who live in a large Victorian house in the affluent enclave of Noe Valley, work from home, but a neighbor said he had not seen them in a few days.

The backlash against Fowler appears to have hit his wife as well. On Friday, her blog, on personallifemedia.com, was defaced by a strip of bacon -- an apparent reference to her boast on "Wife Swap" that her family only eats the finest organic, healthy food money can buy.

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HIGHLIGHTS:

HIGHLIGHTS PART 2

(SCROLL DOWN FOR VIDEOS) SAN FRANCISCO - It's safe to say Stephen Fowler probably wishes he never appeared on "Wife Swap." Fowler's stint on the ABC reality show last month, in which he called a rur...
(SCROLL DOWN FOR VIDEOS) SAN FRANCISCO - It's safe to say Stephen Fowler probably wishes he never appeared on "Wife Swap." Fowler's stint on the ABC reality show last month, in which he called a rur...
 
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I find it shocking how crass and boorish Mr. Fowler was though he claimed to be highly educated and well off. People with true wealth and privelige never need advertise it. I think its rather obvious he's terribly unhappy with himself. The children will ,of course, grow to despise him and the enabling mother.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:08 AM on 02/22/2009
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You wish.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 01:19 AM on 02/22/2009
- RachelMc I'm a Fan of RachelMc 78 fans permalink
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bet those panties used to be white...

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 01:47 AM on 02/22/2009
- dwilkerson I'm a Fan of dwilkerson 9 fans permalink

Newsflash folks: reality shows aren't "real." They're as scripted as anything else. Going after this guy is like going after James Earl Jones for cutting off Luke Skywalker's hand. If you can't tell what's fake and what's real, don't turn on the magic box in your living room before you take your medication, mmkay?

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:59 PM on 02/21/2009
- phoenix12 I'm a Fan of phoenix12 4 fans permalink

Grossly erroneous analogy. James Earl Jones is an actor. Fowler is the real thing, behaving very real in front of very real cameras, under his own volition, in front of his real kids, with clearly visible negative impact on another real human being. You'll notice that no where does Fowler EVER claim that he was reading off of a script or "acting" at the behest of producers. Don't you think that he would be using that as his first defense if it were true? In fact, if you read his wife's blog, Fowler's wife actually apologizes for his husband's despicable behavior. She does not say "it's not real, it's all fake, my husband was just going off of a script." On reality television, cameras role and people hang THEMSELVES with their own rope.

And by the way, not all "reality television" is made equal. Some reality programming is, indeed, heavily "scripted", particularly serial reality television shows like "The Hills", which are basically just soap operas. But for one-off episodes like "Wife Swap", it's merely a case of finding the right kind of jerk, and rolling tape while he goes ballistic. That's what happened with Fowler.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 03:17 AM on 02/22/2009
- devadasi I'm a Fan of devadasi 25 fans permalink

Perhaps we have been had, but the incivility of it all is just plain appalling. These reality shows are so low-brow and vulgar.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:40 PM on 02/21/2009

agreed

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 01:27 AM on 02/22/2009
- dandypuddin I'm a Fan of dandypuddin 188 fans permalink
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San Franciscans are not known for their warm and fuzzy ways.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:30 PM on 02/21/2009
- Brettster I'm a Fan of Brettster 10 fans permalink
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that's ridiculous. i can't think of a more fun, embracing place

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:38 PM on 02/21/2009
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Agreed. A smart person from there is hardly ever condescending. The people from somewhere else are.

I can't believe the reference to the GRE. By taking that test he is comparing himself to people who can't pass high school and this is supposed to be a measure of his intelligence?

He's a Berkeley wannabe.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:42 AM on 02/22/2009
- DeniseD I'm a Fan of DeniseD 25 fans permalink

I disagree. I am a Native Northern Californian and lived in the Bay Area for many years. Whenever I travel to other states, I can't wait to get back home to our friendly people.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:30 AM on 02/22/2009
- devadasi I'm a Fan of devadasi 25 fans permalink

Steve Fowler and his wife are two despicable prigs. So full of themselves and very mean spirited. As a new york snot I was appalled by their verbally and emotionally abusive behavior. They should go back to England. They don't belong in a place called America.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:25 PM on 02/21/2009
- Querent I'm a Fan of Querent 69 fans permalink
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OK, that's not mean spirited at all.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 03:00 AM on 02/22/2009
- SD Indy I'm a Fan of SD Indy 23 fans permalink

Come on now. Maybe he HAD to act like a J E R K. Perhaps their home is about to be foreclosed on and the ONLY way for them to keep it was for them to go on this stu.pid. show and act like fools. You all know that house didn't come cheap.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:14 PM on 02/21/2009
- one4obama I'm a Fan of one4obama 11 fans permalink

Nobody HAS to do something like this. I have more pride in myself to do that, even if it would mean losing my house.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:09 AM on 02/22/2009
- DeniseD I'm a Fan of DeniseD 25 fans permalink

I was thinking the same thing too. Why would he go on such a ridiculous program and embarrass himself and his family unless they were in some kind of trouble financially?

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:32 AM on 02/22/2009
- phoenix12 I'm a Fan of phoenix12 4 fans permalink

It's called ego and narcissism. Clearly the Fowlers think very highly of themselves. They probably thought it would be a great opportunity to show the world what superior human beings they were, while being paid to do so, and with the potential benefit of boosting their personal careers. I don't think they ever thought that any kind of embarrassment could possibly come of this...because their personalities and way of life were so superior and enlightened that the world would certainly look up to them as paragons of human enlightenment that everyone should want to aspire to! That's the problem with narcissists...they are usually the last people to see their own flaws.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 03:27 AM on 02/22/2009
- phoenix12 I'm a Fan of phoenix12 4 fans permalink

I bet your the kind of person who also makes excuses for men who beat up their wives?

No one "HAD" to do anything. And certainly not in front of his kids.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 02:40 AM on 02/22/2009

I think SDindy is being sarcastic.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:42 PM on 02/22/2009
- sloreader I'm a Fan of sloreader 17 fans permalink

And why? Because, in the immortal words of Denis Leary, "He's an @$$hole!"

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:08 PM on 02/21/2009
- zull2 I'm a Fan of zull2 38 fans permalink
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Absolutely hilarious. To get angry over a "reality" show character being "elitist" effectively renders you the butt of a heck of a joke. There has never been a true reality show on television. If there were, it'd get lousy ratings. The notion that you know there's a camera in the room in and of itself causes you to act differently...that's high school level psych right there. All I have to say is that Fowler brilliantly tapped into a part of the human mind that holds a lot of guilt for that person's own lifestyle. Most people have a degree of inferiority complex, which is caused by the awareness that they are not living in a way they really consider ideal on a subconscious level. When you tap that part of the mind, you can make normally polite, friendly people absolutely insane. Andy Kaufmann had a real grasp on that concept.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:03 PM on 02/21/2009
- Bethy1 I'm a Fan of Bethy1 2 fans permalink

You are no fun

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:04 PM on 02/21/2009
- phoenix12 I'm a Fan of phoenix12 4 fans permalink

Maybe you live in a cave, but I know people just like Fowler. People like him do, indeed, walk this earth. Ask anyone who's ever worked in retail or the service industry and they'll tell you that they encounter Fowler's type all the time-- stuck-up @ssholes who treat everyone "below them" like dirt. Fowler is the real thing, not an act. By the way, what his kids say about him isn't an act either. Just watch the whole episode and pay attention to his kids. It's extremely sad. I feel for them.

People have to take responsibility for their own actions and comments. That's the problem with society these days. No one wants to own up to their actions. It's always "someone else's fault." Really pathetic. You reap what you sow.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 02:50 AM on 02/22/2009

I think he has short man's complex..

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:01 PM on 02/21/2009
- mirage2008 I'm a Fan of mirage2008 5 fans permalink

Ding ding! We have a winner!

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:04 PM on 02/21/2009
- Ghost803 I'm a Fan of Ghost803 8 fans permalink

Hes not short. And on a side note, screw you.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:09 PM on 02/21/2009

WOW! I find the most ignorant individuals are those that need to belittle others in order to make themselves feel important or of any value. Stephen is not feeling loved and was likely picked on by classmates as he grew up. Have you ever noticed that people that spend so much time speaking of how much they have, how smart they are, how much they make are often the ones that aren't near as smart as they would like others to believe, and likely don't make more in a year than anyone else?

His wife was so proud of getting her "certificates" for whatever. What kind of person needs a life coach? I would guess many of her clients are the kind of people her husband laughs at. sad excuse for humans and a real waste of human flesh. I would bet, like often is the case, what goes around, comes around.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:46 PM on 02/21/2009
- one4obama I'm a Fan of one4obama 11 fans permalink

Yeah, people need "life coaches"? What the he!! is that all about?

According to Wikipedia:

"Life coaching is a practice with the aim of helping clients determine and achieve personal goal."

Good gawd, now people are so lazy and/or stupid they gotta have someone else determine their personal goals? They can't figure that out for themselves?

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:15 AM on 02/22/2009
- JhNyc I'm a Fan of JhNyc 10 fans permalink

This is from a "reality" TV show, which, by definition, is NOT real. Give your outrage a rest.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:30 PM on 02/21/2009
- Bethy1 I'm a Fan of Bethy1 2 fans permalink

Nope . . . it is fun to vent while you are laid up on the couch recovering from the flu.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:33 PM on 02/21/2009

Just shows how unreal, REALITY shows are. They are encouraged to act ridiculously for entertainment value.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:24 PM on 02/21/2009
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publicity stunt....yawn.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:23 PM on 02/21/2009
- dutt I'm a Fan of dutt 10 fans permalink

Stephen Fowler is not the spokesman or representative for liberals nor for the people of Great Britain. I find it astounding that people on this forum would make negative comments about the British based on Stephen Fowler. Anyway, let's not forget, as embarrassing as he is, he's a naturalized American now. He's every bit as American as you or me.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:12 PM on 02/21/2009
- Bethy1 I'm a Fan of Bethy1 2 fans permalink

Good point!

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:16 PM on 02/21/2009

How do you know for sure what his immigration status is?

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:26 PM on 02/21/2009
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Is there a warranty on him? Can we return him.?

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:59 PM on 02/21/2009
- devadasi I'm a Fan of devadasi 25 fans permalink

Hey Dutt, I've got news for you, Stephen Fowler is no American. He may be an American citizen, but he's not an American. No one who isn't born here can authentically call themselves an American.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:30 PM on 02/21/2009
- Maschine I'm a Fan of Maschine 4 fans permalink

Wow, he makes more in a week then she does in a year, yet he drives a Caravan. this guy screwed himself

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:09 PM on 02/21/2009
- avenue I'm a Fan of avenue 5 fans permalink

*bows* LOL

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:49 PM on 02/21/2009
- one4obama I'm a Fan of one4obama 11 fans permalink

LOL! I did not catch that!!

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:16 AM on 02/22/2009
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and a second bow to you! great call.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 02:33 PM on 02/22/2009
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