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Dickipedia: Nadya Suleman (aka Octomom)

05/16/2009 05:12 am ET | Updated May 25, 2011

Nadya Denise Suleman (born October 12, 1975), also known as Octomom, is an American woman, mother, attention-whore, walking sideshow, and dick.

She first came to international attention when she gave birth to octuplets in January 2009, the second full set of octuplets to be born alive in the United States. Suleman set another record one week later for the fastest turning of public opinion.

Media experts predict that she will cease to be a prominent figure in the public eye after approximately another 4 minutes until 2017 when she will be featured on a game show boxing Dina Lohan for the prize of a budget-rate cruise trip to the Cayman Islands. Also, in 2012, she will be tacitly alluded to in a "ripped from the headlines" edition of Law & Order: Special Victims Unit.

It is not clear who will emerge as the greatest villain of 2009, but villainy experts agree that pirates, bank CEOs, and terrorists could probably not make up enough ground with Middle America to catch up to the Octomom.

Sadly, this entire situation could have been avoided had she seen an informational film on the dangers of this scenario.

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