Dickipedia: John Yoo

Dickipedia:

John Choon Yoo (born June 10, 1967) is an American attorney, former U.S. Justice Department official, Berkeley law professor, writer of memos, foremost authority on routing the U.S. Constitution, alleged war criminal, and an all-around good person. It is important to note however that--though it contradicts all rational reason--in this article, "an all-around good person" has been redefined narrowly to mean "a dick."

Yoo is an eminent scholar of the document known as U.S. Constitution, though this refers specifically to an edition of it that is missing several amendments and has been integrated with entries from Vice President Dick Cheney's bedtime dream journal.

Having devoted his life to the common dick practice of redefining words to mean something different and more convenient, Yoo, during the course of one business day, redefined "acceptable behavior for a civilized nation" to "pretty much anything up to the reenactment of an Eli Roth movie."

Yoo's work is chiefly responsible for the supposed legal justification the Bush administration asserted for the use of "enhanced interrogation techniques," which is like a crazy corporate marketing-speak term for when the vendor fake drowns the consumer.

In his professional world, Yoo's work has caused him to stand out as a shining dick, which, considering this is the legal community we're talking about, is a major achievement in and of itself.


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Comments

[stephanemot]

deserves a spot on dickipedia as well as on FBI's most wanted, along with his former bosses.
http://e-blogules.blogspot.com/2009/03/yoo-got-mail-princes-diary.html

[krawlx]

Can we please get a Dickipedia entry on The American Enterprise Institute? That place is been a bastion of dickddom, having been home to John Bolton, Paul Wolfowitz, and John Yoo.

[whiskeytangofoxtrot451]

Over at Slate, there was an discussion about how Yoo once ran for president of the Harvard Law Review. Apparently, he was rejected because the selection committee felt his views on the powers of that office were too expansive and extreme.

I kid you not.

This guy was a born dictator.

[Zen0469]

Is there a Yoo section in the dickipedia?

Is it cross-referenced under U or is it just listed under D?

[kenEBport]

Only 42 and already a famous (or infamous) dill-wad. His mother should be proud!

[Nicolaus]

This Honour is long overdue.

One of the reason John Yoo went off to Chapman University - not exactly a world famous enterprise for anything is to escape being at Berkeley, where he would be roasted by his students, and would probably be escorted every time he left his house or his office by admirers wanting to make his stay memorable for him - until he finally leaves.

Similarly, his colleagues must have found his company quite embarrassing if not frustrating. His appointment must have been opposed vehemently by many on the faculty due to poor qualifications and experience - although he probably may have presented a novelty that promised some intellectual trips with his vacating the Constitution and re-writing the laws of the land.

Would he come back to Berkeley? Not likely, I should think. He is already found to have no depth apart from dubious and sterile arguments, but if he was convicted in Spain, or better still in the US, the Regents would have to ask him to packup due to professional misconduct.

Americans should work for that. No one who merrily screws their Constitution should be guaranteed a right to teach tyhe young generation the same venomous outreach!

[oxygen]

http://ibc.chapman.edu/Mediasite/Viewer/Viewers/Viewer640.aspx?mode=Default&peid=54c9b944-f64c-4ce3-88b3-c5bb169cd892&pid=218e4b24-c084-454a-b70d-2878feaa25c8&playerType=SL1# listen to his b.s. here from april 21st this year

[Rock4you]

Dickipedia.

Awesome!!, delicious sarcasm , I love to the last drop....

[mypov123]

Wow, an Asian d*ck, is he the first one?? lol

[ADVOCATE4ZPG]

Compare this Korean American's understanding of U.S. legal principles with those practiced by Singmon(sp?) Rhee and almost any other of South Korea's vaunted "democrats"!

[berryessence]

A LITTLE D*CK AT THAT

[thrugreeneyez]

LOL

[wadenelson1]

When I have to convince God that I shouldn't go to hell I'm just going to point at John Yoo and say, "Well God, at least I didn't do THOSE things!!!"

[maddy48]

Hope he's sweating a bit out in the real world. It's not like torture.

[wagadog]

"neither Madison nor the King of England could have foreseen in America's future that, one day, a guy from South Korea would help a former baseball team owner pretend to drown Middle-Eastern men in Cuba."

ROTFLMFAO

[nobozos]

Among all the hilarious lines in the article - that was my favorite too.

[maddy48]

The Dickipedia entry for YOO was brilliant. Now if you were on campus where he teaches would this entry be found on bulletin boards, in hallways, bathrooms, law libraries? The places where people gather? I'm amazed he has a classroom at all. There must be students just trying to figure out where he's coming from while writing that best seller to be completed as soon as he's indicted...My Teacher, Mr. Yoo.

[jerryfromcalifornia]

DEPORT HIM.

[ADVOCATE4ZPG]

If only that were......

[berryessence]

HE'S AMERICAN DOOFUS

BORN AND RAISED

[northstar11]

Does selection for the dikipedia mean the same as election to the" hall of fame of dicks" or is it a list of current allstars dicks from which the DICK HALL OF FAMERS are selected??

IF it is the later , an induction ceremony for the most worthy(super dicks) should happen.

a little fan fare , a little promo and presto three inductees annually.

[Cynth]

This diki entry has been waaaay over due.