Maureen Dowd's Advice To Jenny Sanford: "Change The Locks"

The New York Times:

Stay focused, ladies. Here is The Practical Guide to Help Spurned Political Wives Survive Old Problems in the Era of New Technology.

1. Skip the press conference, especially when your husband is copping to call girls, gay pickups in airport bathrooms or "tragic" and "forbidden" telenovela-style love stories. Stoicism at the skunk's side is overrated and, as Larry Craig's wife learned, sunglasses don't help.

2. When there's an Associated Press bulletin quoting your husband saying that he has found his soul mate but he's going to try to fall back in love with you, change the locks. (At your second home, too.)

Read the whole story: The New York Times

Comments

[ReealOne]

Maureen Dowd's Advice To Jenny Sanford: "Change The Locks"

Great advice. But I would add "also too" that she should pack all of his "stuff" in oversized hefty bags and put them out in the yard(s), so he doesn't have to come inside to get anything.

Here is a man who "continues" to publicly declare his love for his Argentinan mistress..­. over and over again, each and everyday to the entire world and anyone who will listen. This man clearly loves his mistress, and is tormented between his perceived obigation to his family and his desire to be with "Maria". Hmm.... how will he expain "crossing the line" with other mistresses to "Maria".

He doesn't seem to realize that in all of this, the people he has hurt the most is his wife and children, who he has made no public decaration of love to. But to add insult to injury, he says that this Maria is his "soul mate and that they share a world class love story", but says that "he is working on falling in love with his wife".... and THEN, he confesses that he has "crossed the line" with several other women.

Here is a man who is so done with his marriage and family, and wants more than anything to go to "Maria". However, "christian" folks like "chubby" and them, are telling him that he needs to stay with his wife who he no longer loves, so that it doesn't look bad for christians.

[rugbymom]

The more he burbles on about Maria and the others, the easier Jenny's decisions are. (I've been in her shoes, and the more he burbled about "the only woman I've ever loved," the clearer it got for me.) His religious background requires him to mouth the platitudes about rebuilding his marriage and all that -- but it's clearly just words.

[ReealOne]

Exactly!

[daisydukes]

Excellent article ms Dowd. With the recent regular confessions of liasons and finding their "soulmates" from prominent politicians, I think the time has come to have all first ladies attend " a prep school on how to deal with public revelations husbands' liasons". It is happening too regular and it is disheartening to see these poor wives floundering to figure out how to cope with it.

First of all, they must drop the "stepford wife" syndrome as in "stand by your mine at all cost". Secondly, either do not attend these public confessions or attend it FACING the cheating husband with their children by her side,( not standing next to him), so he can watch the damge he is doing in action. Thirdly, publicly through him out of the house...as in throwing clothes out the window LOL! What a picture, just priceless. As for "Mr tanlines and soft kisses", he was not only cheating on his wife, but also on his mistress "ms Argentina", can this guy be faithful..­.that is the million dollar question!

[skippypicasso]

Yes, she has to change her hair, and then maybe the locks on the doors.

[IndependenceDame]

LOL.

[roshni]

Great advice - and take him to the cleaner's.

[jcwtts1]

I think it is her money

[Wiseronenow]

When Dowd wrote:

High-powered women like Hillary, Elizabeth and Jenny who give up their careers to focus on their husbands’ ambitions feel doubly betrayed. But it’s not your husband’s fault if you sacrifice more for the relationship than he does. Like an investor in a down market, you took a risk without a guarantee it would pay off. If you make your husband your career and you lose your husband, you lose your career, too.

It is pearls for all women.

[Gabisol]

An excellent advice for our daughters

[Hollywooddeed]

I wouldn't get near that thing, not knowing where it has been.

[mokachyna]

Jenny...yo­ur husband doesn't love you.

[allonfla]

Does anyone notice that the wife and the mistress look alike? In that grainy television photo of the mistress you can see a resemblance. Just look, seriously.

[Shifted]

I agree; I thought the same thing. Original or Spicy?

[allonfla]

lol!

[MED1025]

Listen to Maureen and change the locks, the telephone numbers and the PIN numbers on the bank accounts. You are worth more than being second best.

If this man would go off to Argentina to moon over his soulmate over the Father's Day weekend, you know where his wife and family stand on his priority list.

[roshni]

And sue for sole custody of those boys.

[SurrealPumpkin]

Shouldn't be a problem, the father has a history of disappearing for days.

[Shifted]

Lady Sanford: Do You! Do what works for you. At the end of the day it is your life, your decision, you own no one, but yourself and your own conscience. Be at peace with whatever decision you make.

Dont allow yourself to be rushed or pressured by the external forces.

Do You! whatever it is (even if it is staying with your man) Do you!

[Citizen-Jane]

Agree.

[riverhouse]

The problem is 'her man' loves another woman.

[zg1968]

Unfortunately, her man has publicly said his mistress is his soulmate and he is trying to fall back in love with his wife. You can't come back from that.

What a doormat she would be to stay. What kind of message does it send to her four sons - that it's okay to lie and have a foreign lover as long as you invoke the bible?

Save the kids Jenny - end this farce.

[Drash]

To Jenny Stanford: Leave the slime ball and come shack up with me. I think you're kind of hot.

[mapleaforever]

Have bible, will thump.

[Phoebe917]

or "have bible, will *hump*"

[gloriousbeing]

Mark Sanford is lucky he isn't married to me. I would NOT have kept his secret for 5 months - I would have flushed his career in a heartbeat.

[Gabisol]

Why do you think she flushed his career?

[TMIDGE66]

interesting how all the republicans want to forgive Sanford but wanted to hang Clinton. Clinton was in his office taking care of business (and the other business) Sanford didnt give a damn about his sons and didnt care about his consitituents. he has no right to be governor. you know he will do it again. maybe he should talk to John Ensign or gingrich or David Vetter, or mr. Haggard, gosh he has so many choices. oh the humainity!­!!!!!!!!!!

[exclintonsupporter]

If they could salvage the marriage, I would not agree. But I truly believe that Sanford is in love with Maria...an­d she is in love with him. Jenny doesn't stand a chance under those circumstances. It appears that Jenny is trying to be strong...b­ut no telling what she has been through the past six months. I think everybody should work to try to save their marriage..­.especiall­y if you have been married 20 years...an­d have children..­.but this man is in love... at least he thinks he is...and Jenny will never be able to convince him otherwise. Plus, she would not be able to trust him. She does not need or deserve the pain (no matter what her role was in all of this---course I doubt if she had one) that is going to come her way if she just trys to hang in there...ne­ither do her sons.

[NoPretenses]

P.S. Take him to the cleaners..­.you have the entire country supporting your decision.

How sweet it would be if Gov. Sanford lost his governorship and Ms. Argentina no longer thought he was a hot ticket. LoL.

[roshni]

I agree. You don't deserve to be second best. Dump him!