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I'm Not Here To Make Friends '09: Reality TV Contestants Still Jerks (VIDEO)

First Posted: 08/07/09 06:12 AM ET Updated: 05/25/11 02:35 PM ET

If you watch reality television you know there are certain lines repeated over and over again: "It's about to get real," "I don't think he/she is here for the right reasons," "that girl has syphilis." Ok, the last one isn't actually spoken out loud that often, but I'm sure people are mind muttering it all the time. The most famous of these axioms was put into a collection last year by enterprising blogger Rich Juzwiak. He found countless instances of people saying, "I'm not here to make friends," the motto of those contestants that do asshole things and refuse to acknowledge that they are terrible people. He strung them together into a masterpiece (aka the second video below). Now he's back with his '09 version and it's even better than the first. There's more booze, more insane rationalizations, more cliches, more threats of violence and more trash.


WATCH:

Here's the '08 version:


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If you watch reality television you know there are certain lines repeated over and over again: "It's about to get real," "I don't think he/she is here for the right reasons," "that girl has syphilis."...
If you watch reality television you know there are certain lines repeated over and over again: "It's about to get real," "I don't think he/she is here for the right reasons," "that girl has syphilis."...
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03:08 PM on 07/13/2009
"Reality TV Contestants Still Jerks" - DUH!! Isn't that a prerequisite for being on so-called reality TV, which, as others have already pointed out is scripted and has little or nothing to do with reality
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cjk002
A giant brain is a terrible thing to waste
06:08 PM on 07/12/2009
All reality TV should be BANNED!



*(except for Top Chef, Project Runway, and America's Next Top Model)
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gx5000
Life's too short, be happy..
11:25 PM on 07/10/2009
Well let's remember one thing...
REALITY TV IS SCRIPTED.
So yeah, they all said it, so what..c'est le télévion vie...
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John Horner
09:54 AM on 07/08/2009
The funny thing about "Reality TV" is that all of those shows have a room full of writers coming up with things for the contestants to say. How real is it if there is a script?
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6925thCobras
09:40 AM on 07/08/2009
Thank you Huffington Post for posting this clip. Every so often I get tempted to buy a television and sign up for cable. This kind of stuff reminds me that TV hasn't changed much in the past 5 years that I have been without it. Dumb, dumb, dumb.
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Poorsarah
02:21 AM on 07/08/2009
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! What a bunch of toughies...who, most likely, have trouble kepping friends.
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Patriot68
10:58 PM on 07/07/2009
He should have told that chick at the end of the 2nd video to jump up and down. =)
08:18 PM on 07/07/2009
I made it to the 33 second mark. I NEVER watch any of this crap, and I'm here to brag about it.
12:46 PM on 07/10/2009
You are obviously not here to make friends.
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cjk002
A giant brain is a terrible thing to waste
06:09 PM on 07/12/2009
You can't brag about something when no one cares.
jaslyn
why can't we all just get along?
06:21 PM on 07/07/2009
This has always puzzled me. Those 2 things aren't mutually exclusive. You won't lose just because you act like a decent human being to those around you.
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mjeffn
Freedom's just another word 4 nothing left to lose
04:30 PM on 07/07/2009
yawn
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pakaal
Pigs, in cages, on antibiotics
03:15 PM on 07/07/2009
What a friendless lot.