Hardball Panel Debates Why Politicians, And The Public, Can't Stay Faithful (VIDEO)

The recent string of marital affairs conducted by high-profile politicians, such as Senator John Ensign and Governor Mark Sanford, has left the public wondering why so many politicians just can't seem to resist the temptation to cheat. TIME magazine's latest cover story examines the state of marriage in America, and concludes that the two-parent family in general is under assault.

Washington Post columnist Kathleen Parker and TIME's Richard Stengel joined "Hardball" to analyze why cheating seems to be so much more prevalent these days. For Parker, a main factor is that "the temptation that's always been in place is exaggerated. There's more opportunities." That, combined with a politician's heightened sense of narcissism, probably explains a lot.

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Comments

[policyhack]

The real problem with the American Right"s obsession with moral purity is not the embarrassing exposure of hypocrisy that inevitably occurs when Larry Craig gets caught with his pants down, when Mark Foley flirts with adolescent boys, or when Newt Gingrinch admits the failure of yet another of his "traditional" marriages. The real problem is that the family values crusade crowds out the people and ideas on the Right that can serve this country"s interests. I look forward to elections when Republicans focus on balanced budgets, tax reform, entitlement reform, school choice, and market-oriented compensation for teachers. I look forward to a Republican party that competes on the basis of its ideas and not the promotion of its piety.

http://axisofreason.com/2009/06/27/republicans-sex-and-family-values/

[littlechuckie]

I think the morals of the country have diminished over the last 8 years. When people pound their chests and say they are moral and point at others - 3 fingers are usally pointing back.....

[pfc1369]

Americans are forever gazing at their navels, and looking in the mirror.

Aren't we the best, don't we always mean well. aren't we the last best hope, don't we have the strongest military ever?...et­c. etc...

Ans our morals...w­hat about our morals?

It is a permanent state of adolescence.

Grow up, America!

[lamarkpowells]

damn I feel bad for the Govenor

[Tyler-Durden]

except for what the lady in pink said, this is crap.

as far as marriage in general goes, when children are victims of divorce, they lose respect for marriage as an institution, as a lifelong commitment that it is supposed to be. it is no longer a vow. it is just a higher level of dating, where you get a cake and presents.

as far as cheating among politicians goes, most of today's politicians have become the most self-serving, self-absorbed people ever to walk the globe. they accept bribes, they do whatever they want, and essentially have become modern day royalty, acting as if they are above the laws and morays of society. they have no respect for anyone that they represent, seeing their constituents as ignorant peasants. it is no surprise that they would disrespect their wives, whom they most likely married for political reasons as well. they are inethical, shameful creatures who must be removed from office one by one.

to attempt to justify their infidelity by stating that marriage in America is less respected, is taking it too far. there is no excuse for their inethical, immoral behavior. if they cannot represent the good people of America, they shouldn't represent ANYONE.

[ohiodem250]

1) In the past, marriage was not about love or personal feelings. It was a duty. People married because it brought order and efficiency to a community. It also variously consolidated or redistributed wealth. Marriage was the original politics. As our modern world has continued to become increasingly individualistic and material, people's sense of duty has diminished.
2) Our culture is hyper-sexualized. Turn on FM radio with a ten-year old in the car and you'll understand right away.
3) Increasing dynamic of economic mobility (both up and down) and the increasing fluidity of society in general has completely shattered the traditional norms of social interaction. Different classes and races and cultures now abut and collide on a minute-by-minute basis. Cultural and traditional norms that used to control our everyday actions have become moot. Moral and cultural ambiguity is an obvious result.

The jury is still out on whether this is a good thing or a bad thing. I suppose there can be strong arguments on both sides.

[ptfcNassoc]

As a sociology major I love your post. Speaking my language.

[ohiodem250]

Sociology and philosophy were always my favorites. While I consider myself somewhat liberal on social issues (gay marriage, etc), I think it would probably be a more libertarian stance I have. Because when I take a sociological view on things like the above, I find myself agreeing with a conservative (or more accurately, traditional) viewpoint.

[ptfcNassoc]

Why a man cheats can be a little more complex then "just be a 'good' husband". That's the thing a man can be a "good" husband in everyway except for this "extracurricular activity". It has to do with that specific man's psychological state in that point of his life. There's temptation all the time and everywhere but you have to have the mental capacity to be above that. All because you are married and a "good" husband doesn't mean you are blind and don't see attractive women everywhere you go or that your most basic primal sexual urges aren't there. Where men fail is when we don't realize/understand that you actually have to but in effort into NOT doing it, into using our brain and not just being a cave man about it. It's not some disney fairytale where once you find your cinderella then she becomes "the only woman in the world in your eyes forever". Throughout life we will come in contact with other women that we may have good chemistry with and find attractive, but if you are married that doesn't mean you act on it. In a world with 6-7 billion people in it we sometimes fail to realize our wives/long time partners are not the only females we could have ever met and been happy with. Like Mark Sanford many men find this "other women" later in life and say "oh boy but it feels so right". Thats not how it works.

[Tyler-Durden]

whatever. it is NOT COMPLEX.

a man cheats because he thinks he won't get caught, and has no spine to back up his vow of fidelity. he trades his integrity for a chance to satisfy his brief feelings of lust. it's wrong.

don't make a vow before God/the state if you cannot keep it.

[ptfcNassoc]

I was speaking of more the mark sanford style of cheating. Where he claimed he fell in love with another women for real. Not so much the Elliot Spitzer style.

[justoverit333]

I just love Lawrence. He's so professional.

[JFaye]

Lawrence O'Donnell (sp) is one of the most forceful, yet calm and intelligent moderators I've seen in years. Why MSNBC has not given him a show yet is beyond me...

Heck ... If it were my decision to make, he would sub for David Gregory on Meet the Press and once he builds a base, would become its regular moderator.

My experience with the "unfaithful" is not that complex ... children who are not taught control over their impulses usually become adults who lack control of their impulses. This is especially true when there is a void of character.

[DestinationsUnknown]

Hope you can give us soem news

other than the host who voted for nush twice and his opinion

how about some facts

Coburn – Mr. Anti Earmark- Are you kidding me?

Coburn- throws his gun amendment into national parks via the credit card bill?

Are you kidding me?

Doug Hampton said that Oklahoma Senator Tom Coburn and others urged Ensign "to end the affair and help the Hamptons pay off their home and move to Colorado. But Ensign was so infatuated that he continued, Hampton said, reports the Las Vegas Sun.

He also claimed that Ensign paid Hampton's wife more than $25,000 in severance, which could be a possible felony violation of campaign finance law.

[DestinationsUnknown]

Sorry-

wrong post

was supposed to begin at the crime scene:

Coburn " Mr. Anti Earmark- Are you kidding me?

Coburn- throws his gun amendment into national parks via the credit card bill?

Are you kidding me?

Doug Hampton said that Oklahoma Senator Tom Coburn and others urged Ensign "to end the affair and help the Hamptons pay off their home and move to Colorado. But Ensign was so infatuated that he continued, Hampton said, reports the Las Vegas Sun.

He also claimed that Ensign paid Hampton's wife more than $25,000 in severance, which could be a possible felony violation of campaign finance law.

Hampton added that Coburn confronted Ensign and urged him to provide millions of dollars in assistance to the Hamptons to pay off their mortgage, in addition to getting Ensign to write a remorseful letter to Cynthia Hampton.

[breakingpoint]

Sanford: "...if you undermine trust in our system, you undermine everything­."

What's wrong with him is the hypocrisy.
His own words condemn him he's not to be trusted, he should resign or be forever known as a cheat and a liar.

[Decipherer]

I suppose what should have been done to Bill Clinton should not have been applied to him. Good one, governor.

Now, even the SC state legislature, which I understand is controlled by the GOP, is backing off on calling for either his impeachment (for dereliction of duty, as in going AWOL for a week!) or resignation. Good one, SC legislature.

I for one do not want to hear another word from these hypocrites ever again about the conduct of any other politician unless it directly affects his/her job performance or could be in violation of the law.

[BluebirdofUnhappiness]

Isn't one of the Christian tenents Do unto others..? and for the OT fans, An eye for an eye? Wish they'd follow their beliefs, but if you're not adhering to the sanctity of marriage thing I guess its a lifestyle pattern.

[mouselion]

Human frailty in the matters of lust and love is universal. Some have a problem with it, others simply do not. Our modern lifestyles in today's society may be more conducive for extramarital affairs than in, say, 1909, but that's not the crux of the matter.

The real concern, to me, is the use of religion, by politicians and other public figures, as a way to hide behind one's action. The hypocrisy of forgiving oneself through the use of bible verses -- immediately -- while castigating your political opponents for the same behavior.

[BlackYowe]

Yes its most irksome when the hypocrites spew.

[Vixter]

I think the writer for a free paper in St. Louis aptly named the bible quoting hypocrites
tal. i. ban. gel. ists.

Remember Dan Quayle castigating "Murphy Brown" for the failure of family values?

[BlackYowe]

I went to a funeral the other day. A lovely senior lady I know passed on and I was a pawl bearer. The windower was mourning and so full of sorrow, it was heart breaking to see. He was a a POW in WW2 and loyal to his wife to the end. You see the couple was married 67 years. My parents were married 56 years and then my Dad passed on. I have been married 29 years. It really isn't hard, you just have to work at marrige and care. Cheating is a really sad and pathetic thing and does not have to be considered the norm in society. You hear about all the cheating and all the divorces but seldom do you hear the good stories so I am here to say there are allot of us out here who don't cheat, who stay married, and who thrive on the wonderful relationships we have.

[golferman]

Really nice post. I have been married for 37 years. It has been the best 37 years of my life. I can not understand what is so hard about being a good husband. Being a good husband was the easy part. It was making a living that got kind of hard from time to time.

[seachild]

i re-married­...and am MUCH HAPPIER with the man whom i feel is THE RIGHT ONE...now my ex has since remarried as well

you don't HAVE to stay with the first partner...­many couple are unhappily married for 30+ years..wha­t good is that?

what's important is that you GET IT RIGHT, then stick with it

[MoEls]

I agree - to a certain extent.

Of course it is better to leave a bad relationship behind than stickin to it js because you said "yes" in a moment when you and other's expected it to be appropriate.

But: Looking at relationship in general you can see a huge majority of repeated patterns: E.g. people manage to stay in a relationship for the same time (like 3 years, 3 1/2...), the same sickening dialogues return, unfaithfulness, whatever you want to add here.

What I now try to say is:
"We", "I", "You" js is a concept. A collection of beliefs how we are, our personality and the world around us is. When we just can see ourselves in a static way we will produce one failed relationship after the other.

[JanSP1971]

Agreed, nothing wrong with getting a divorce from a person that you are really not in love with. What is wrong is cheating on that person before you get the divorce. If these guys would have gotten divorced and moved on with their lives with out doing such damage to their wives and children I don't think anyone would be upset.

[MurrayAbraham]

The fact a "debate" such like this is considered news shows to what extent we are a nation of retards as far as sex and marriage is concerned.
I am always flabbergasted at the level of immaturity there is in our public debates on all matters related to sex compared to other countries I have lived in (including Switzerland which isn't known as a libertine country but has a fantastic record on sexual education and HIV prevention).
Everybody has different sexual urges at various periods in life, and there are as many ways of handling those desires as there are couples. End of debate, let's move on to health care.

[nccp1870]

Lawrence O'Connell is a great Moderator. Smart, quick, witty. Why doesn't he have a show of his own. He knows so much about how the Senate, etc. operates. MSNBC has several drips, e.g. Contessa Brewer, in their lineup.

They had better give this guy a slot before someone else does.

[LemonMeringue]

He actually reminds me a little of Edward R. Murrow.

[PaiaGirl]

Yes. Usually I don't much like the stand ins but he did a good job.

[Decipherer]

O'Donnell, actually, and you are right -- he is smart, articulate, progressive, and does not suffer fools gladly.

[squatmunkie]

Where is Chris Matthews? He has missed some great things to cover....a­nd i miss him! :(

[ekoorb]

Chances are good that infidelity will be around whenever he returns from wherever he is.

[Decipherer]

Vacation