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Gay Sperm Donor Should Be Able To See His Son, Irish Judges Say

SHAWN POGATCHNIK | 12/10/09 10:55 AM | AP

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DUBLIN — The Irish Supreme Court ruled Thursday that a gay man who donated his sperm to a lesbian couple should be permitted to see his 3-year-old son regularly – in part because Ireland's constitution doesn't recognize the lesbians as a valid family unit.

The ruling was a legal first in Ireland, where homosexuality was outlawed until 1993 and gay couples are denied many rights given to married couples. Critics contend the case highlights how Ireland's conservative Catholic 1937 constitution conflicts with contemporary European norms and fails to address the reality that hundreds of gay couples in Ireland have children.

In their unanimous decision, the five judges of Ireland's ultimate constitutional authority said a lower court erred by trying to apply the European Convention on Human Rights in favor of the lesbian couple. The Supreme Court concluded that when the two are in conflict, the Irish constitution is superior to European human rights law.

In her written judgment, Supreme Court Justice Susan Denham said the lesbian couple provide a loving, stable home for their son – but that the constitution defines parents as a married man and woman, and gays are not permitted to marry in Ireland.

She said Irish law does identify the sperm donor as the father, and he therefore had a right to have a relationship with his son.

"There is benefit to a child, in general, to have the society of his father," Denham wrote. "I am satisfied that the learned High Court judge gave insufficient weight to this factor."

In April 2008, High Court Justice John Hedigan ruled in favor of the lesbian couple and rejected the man's application to have visitation or guardianship rights. The man immediately appealed.

In his ruling, Hedigan said Irish law contained nothing explicit to suggest that two women and a child possessed "any lesser right to be recognized as a de-facto family than a family composed of a man and woman unmarried to each other and a child."

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Hedigan said the European rights charter's Article 8 did not discriminate between heterosexuals and gays in enshrining their right to a private family life.

The 42-year-old man, whose identity has been concealed throughout two years of legal wrangling, attended Thursday's judgment and said he was overjoyed with the verdict.

The lesbian couple did not attend.

The Supreme Court appealed to both sides to negotiate an agreement on when the man could begin visiting his son. It referred the question of granting the man full guardianship rights back to the High Court.

The man testified that the lesbian couple had been his good friends, and he agreed to donate sperm to one of them on condition that he would be treated as the family's "favorite uncle."

But after the 2006 birth, both sides agreed that their relationship soured – reaching the breaking point when the two women decided to move to Australia with the boy.

The man successfully sued to prevent them from leaving Ireland pending a custody ruling.

Ireland's parliament has yet to pass laws that effectively regulate fertility clinics or define the clashing parenting rights of gay couples versus sperm donors.

Earlier this month, the government opened debate on a Civil Partnership Bill that, if passed, would give gay couples many marriage-style rights, particularly in relation to property, finances and inheritance. It offers no legal recognition of their right to be parents.

DUBLIN — The Irish Supreme Court ruled Thursday that a gay man who donated his sperm to a lesbian couple should be permitted to see his 3-year-old son regularly – in part because Ireland's...
DUBLIN — The Irish Supreme Court ruled Thursday that a gay man who donated his sperm to a lesbian couple should be permitted to see his 3-year-old son regularly – in part because Ireland's...
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- RayinDC I'm a Fan of RayinDC 11 fans permalink
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I think that a sperm donor should be able to specify that his donation includes the reservation of some biological rights, and the sperm recipient should be able to reject that (and reject the sperm donation). If the sperm donor makes no such reservation, then he retains no rights (although the sperm recipient could, at her option, later decide to grant him such rights upon request). The child, when he/she is 18, should then have the right to find out who his/her biological father is.

That's my view. Other approaches are also possible, but whether the sperm donor and/or sperm recipient is gay or straight should have NOTHING to do with the allocation of rights.

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 04:07 PM on 12/12/2009
- JohnRamboWayne I'm a Fan of JohnRamboWayne 13 fans permalink

Good grief. This poor kid. The adults involved sound like a bunch of selfish children themselves.

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 08:36 PM on 12/11/2009
- Liberal Angel I'm a Fan of Liberal Angel 244 fans permalink
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Like ALL adults involved in familial disputes.

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 11:13 PM on 12/11/2009
- JohnRamboWayne I'm a Fan of JohnRamboWayne 13 fans permalink

This situation his hardly like most custodial/visitation disputes.

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 11:54 AM on 12/12/2009
- The-JuRK I'm a Fan of The-JuRK 9 fans permalink
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What a mess....

For all you guys out there selling or donating your sperm--or people looking to have children from donated sperm--the rights of the child supsede all business arrangements.

What that means is that if a lesbian couple uses your sperm to have a child and they split up, they can come after you, the father, for child support. They'll simply subpoena the records from the donor agency and, bang, there's your name. So you've got a lesbian with your baby tapping into your bank account.

You (and probably your real family) won't feel so good about helping your fellow human being out when that happens. Just sayin'.

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 02:41 PM on 12/11/2009
- Liberal Angel I'm a Fan of Liberal Angel 244 fans permalink
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That's total BU//$#!T. Sperm donors are NOT repsonsible for child support, that is a LIE. The rights of children DO NOT supercede the rights of donors' privacy.

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 05:35 PM on 12/11/2009
- The-JuRK I'm a Fan of The-JuRK 9 fans permalink
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Yeah...keep telling yourself that....

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 10:33 PM on 12/11/2009
- StevenKeirstead I'm a Fan of StevenKeirstead 21 fans permalink
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That’s mostly true in the US. The parents are the pregnant woman and the man (or in some states the wife). The non-biological parent assumes paternity under law, so the sperm donor has no financial obligations. If they can’t afford a family they should not be getting sperm.

But anonymous donation centers offer more protection everyone. I have a gay friend who donated anonymously 50 times while in medical school; he has no idea how many kids actually resulted, but he certainly could not afford to support even half so many. I’m sure the parents were happy to have a kid of their own at all. The medical school’s program will only share health info with parents and the kids, not identity. He does not regret helping people, or not knowing his progeny.

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 10:37 PM on 12/11/2009
- smr525 I'm a Fan of smr525 permalink

I was not implying physical defects in these children, I thought that it was obvious that I was speaking about the emotional toll of these procedures. I think when we create children through "donations" of genetic material with the assumption that everything will turn out fine and be uncomplicated, we are being delusional.

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 10:08 PM on 12/10/2009
- smr525 I'm a Fan of smr525 permalink

Setting aside the gay rights issue and the need for reform, isn't the real issue here the consequences of sperm donation, egg donation, surrogacy, etc...? This seems to be a dangerous game we're playing with human liives.

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 06:27 PM on 12/10/2009
- Liberal Angel I'm a Fan of Liberal Angel 244 fans permalink
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Whose lives are being played with? The only dangers with these treatments are almost negligable. The children born are just fine.

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 09:47 PM on 12/10/2009
- smr525 I'm a Fan of smr525 permalink

I was not implying physical defects in these children, I thought that it was obvious that I was speaking about the emotional toll of these procedures. I think when we create children through "donations" of genetic material with the assumption that everything will turn out fine and be uncomplicated, we are being delusional.

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 10:10 PM on 12/10/2009
- JohnRamboWayne I'm a Fan of JohnRamboWayne 13 fans permalink

This kid was born as the result of the selfish desires of 3 irresponsible people.

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 08:39 PM on 12/11/2009

Every time human beings have children, they are "playing with human lives." I have a lot of friends who have had sperm-donor babies, both gay and straight, and they thought long and hard about how to handle the issue of the relationship with the sperm donor, and how the child might feel about not having a traditional biological father. On an everyday level, I would say that they are no better or worse than then heterosexual, fertile parents I know who had children in their 30s, but what all these people have in common, is that they are all really committed to being good parents. They really CHOSE to be parents, and those children are wanted. On the other hand, I have a lot of friends who work in the juvenile justice system, and every day they work with kids whose parents conceived them the "natural" way, and whose lives have been nightmarish. If you really cared about children, you would be worrying about PARENTING, not the way a kid arrives in this world. You're the one being delusional if you think that "traditional" families always, or even mostly, produce happy children.

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 09:14 AM on 12/11/2009
- smr525 I'm a Fan of smr525 permalink

My comment was not about parenting. I'm merely making a rational statement that when children are conceived using these new technologies, it introduces new complications. You're notions of good parenting and bad parenting are clouding your perspective. I did not once say that gay couples, or single mothers cannot be excellent parents, nor did I imply that traditional, biological parents cannot be horrible parents. My point is merely that I think we need to take a step back and think about the repercusions of using these processes to produce children. Is this story not a clear indication of that?

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 09:58 AM on 12/11/2009
- dennissinned I'm a Fan of dennissinned 30 fans permalink

Inquiring minds want to know what happened that the couple would shut out the father from their son's life?

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 03:53 PM on 12/10/2009
- hypnotoad72 I'm a Fan of hypnotoad72 177 fans permalink
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Callous selfishness.

It's a simple as that.

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 05:58 PM on 12/10/2009
- DannyEV I'm a Fan of DannyEV 123 fans permalink
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it says simply that the relationship soured. human relationships of all kinds are complicated. we really dont know.

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 08:02 PM on 12/10/2009
- siafu I'm a Fan of siafu 12 fans permalink

Was he ever intended to be part of the child's life? It was a sperm donation, after all.

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 04:50 PM on 12/11/2009
- KataVideo I'm a Fan of KataVideo 104 fans permalink
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nice picture. gay guy's j\i\z\z is pink? isn't that what right wingers believe?

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 02:58 PM on 12/10/2009
- hypnotoad72 I'm a Fan of hypnotoad72 177 fans permalink
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OMG!

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 05:58 PM on 12/10/2009
- hypnotoad72 I'm a Fan of hypnotoad72 177 fans permalink
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Context to the "OMG!" statement:

I was drinking cola and spit it onto my keyboard when I read your post, LOL!

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 05:59 PM on 12/10/2009
- ipastor01 I'm a Fan of ipastor01 37 fans permalink
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No one can pre-empt some ones right to want to know who's ones biological parent really is. So donors and users beware.

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 02:56 PM on 12/10/2009
- OmegaHunter I'm a Fan of OmegaHunter 14 fans permalink
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That's not what happened here at all.

The man donated his sperm to the lesbian couple which were, at that time, his friends.

He WAS going to be in the child's life as a sort of uncle but the friendship went south and the couple wanted to move to Australia.

He then sued them for custody arguing that under Irish law they aren't legally a family. Nevermind the fact that this was, for all intents and purposes, THEIR kid and not his.

If this happened in the US he could not get away with this. A sperm donor here is in no way legally the parent and has no rights to the child. On the other hand they are no way legally responsible for the child financially or otherwise. That's how sperm banks operate anyway, I can't imagine this situation would be any different.

Hell, the only reason he is getting away with it there is because Ireland is super Catholic and has a conservative constitution unlike other nations in Western Europe.

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 06:28 AM on 12/11/2009
- ipastor01 I'm a Fan of ipastor01 37 fans permalink
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I know that is not what happened here. I only post this caveat, because it relates

My point is that when the kids grow up, it is quite reasonable that many would want to know who their biological parents are and who is to say that they don't have the right to know. Who was that kid that made a couple thousand dollars one morning 18 years ago by jerking off ? Who are we to tell him or her NO, just because of a confidentiality agreement signed by this persons biological father or mother with some clinic somewhere, therefore selling short the rights of a third person not even born yet.

Wouldn't you want to know?

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 12:58 PM on 12/11/2009
- Knowbetter I'm a Fan of Knowbetter 46 fans permalink
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This is slightly off-topic, but I just couldn't help myself.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U0kJHQpvgB8

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 02:43 PM on 12/10/2009
- popart I'm a Fan of popart 22 fans permalink
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i think he was the one in the middle.

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 02:32 PM on 12/10/2009
- hypnotoad72 I'm a Fan of hypnotoad72 177 fans permalink
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Thanks for the visual...

/ducksforcover

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 05:59 PM on 12/10/2009
- poster1122 I'm a Fan of poster1122 34 fans permalink

Legally, it sounds like the correct decision. So, now, one hopes the Irish will correct their laws.

    Favorite     Flag as abusive Posted 01:46 PM on 12/10/2009
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