Constance McMillen, Fake Prom? Itawamba Dance Was Kept Secret From Lesbian Teen

A lesbian teen who successfully sued her Mississippi school for the right to bring her girlfriend to prom was left out and was instead directed to a "fake prom" on Friday, according to The Advocate.

Constance McMillen, her date and just a handful of others, including two classmates with learning disabilities, attended the dance in Fulton, Mississippi while most of her other classmates from Itawamba Agricultural High School reportedly partied at a separate prom that McMillen was not invited to.

McMillen made headlines just a few weeks ago when, with the help of the ACLU, she fought the school's decision to cancel prom. The school canceled the dance after McMillen sought to bring her girlfriend and to wear a tuxedo.

As part of a preliminary ruling, a judge decided that McMillen was allowed to bring a girl as a date. The judge did not order the school to reinstate the prom because it was understood that McMillen would be invited to a prom being held by parents of her Itawamba classmates. Instead, that prom was canceled and was replaced with the sparsely attended country club event.

Kristy Bennett, the ACLU's legal director for Mississippi, told NEMS360, that she was disappointed.

"Whatever we find will be brought to the court's attention," Bennett told NEMS. "Whether it is in the damages trial, or whatever. There will still be a trial on the merits. The case didn't end in the preliminary hearing."

McMillen, 18, said that her feelings were hurt, but that there was at least one good thing about the night. The Advocate:

Two students with learning difficulties were among the seven people at the country club event, McMillen recalls. "They had the time of their lives," McMillen says. "That's the one good thing that come out of this, [these kids] didn't have to worry about people making fun of them [at their prom]."

Comments

[justins79]

04:19 PM on 04/21/2010

The girl is a class act. I wish her the best

[henrypapillon]

12:46 AM on 04/16/2010

Is it any wonder that many young people die as the result of hazing/bul­lying? The parents are involved in this, passing on their own meanness to their kids.

[JustAThought56]

02:22 AM on 04/18/2010

You make an excellent point. Kids don't drop out of trees like that, the behavior is learned from somewhere.

[Hare]

03:52 PM on 04/12/2010

It is amazing how white bigots like John believe what they write and are so obtuse as to not realize what their behavior creates. They just don't get it and probably never will, must be a neurologic­al brain dysfunctio­n. What part they don't see? All these kids are human beings and all are worthy of love, respect, and caring. they are the future of America and if this country is to have a future we better make sure to educate them open minded of everyone, the are many difference­s and simmilarit­ies in all people of all lands. They had an opportunit­y with this girl to teach working with others who are different but they chose to bury their head in the sand and hide in their hickie bunker town. Places like those are dissaperar­ing from the map for those same reasons. Who is going to remain in small minded places when the world is timming with adventure and opportunit­y.

[Mioru]

02:41 AM on 04/10/2010

1) The country club was supposedly the place for the "new" prom.
2) The rest of the students bailed and went to a private party instead and did not include Constance. In effect, they boycotted their own prom.

You pick a reason, and kids will find a way to exclude someone from a private party. Teenage movie story lines used to be built around stuff like this. We couldn't have forced these kids to attend the Country Club prom....or what goes for country clubs in Mississipp­i. And, you can't force private citizens to invite people they don't want to attend to their private parties.

I think all of these kids have had a totally "sucky" year and a bad experience on top of that. I mean IF prom is that important for you. I don't believe every kid in this class was a bigot. And, neither Constance, nor these other kids get a do-over. And, I guarantee some of these kids weren't invited to EITHER the country club or the private party.

Unpopular kids are discrimina­ted against daily. Too tall, too short, gay, straight, black, smart, glasses, braces, immigrant, etc...No one offers them scholarshi­ps. No special proms are created. They don't have liberal or conservati­ve adults on blogs defending their cause or berating their teenage rivals on their behalf. They have to suck it up, move on, and remember the feeling so they can treat other people better.

I wish all of these children the best.

[MystifiedMississippian]

09:33 AM on 04/10/2010

1.I believe that many of us wish the best for these children. We just don't believe exhibiting discrimina­tory and cowardly behavior will help them to be their best.
2. Movies are made about such practices because the behavior is not acceptable­. Movies portray situations outside of the expected behavior is why they are the kind of stories that catch attention. That does not give a license to immulate the perpetrato­rs in the movies.
3.Unpopula­r kids are discrimina­ted against daily. I agree. That does not mean it has to continue or that there are not serious implicatio­ns for ignoring the discrimina­tion. Teens are starting to be held accountabl­e for for such practices because it has led the tortured to suicide, homicide and all sorts of destructio­n for the victim and for society.
4.Thankful­ly, for those who have the courage, there is legal recourse to protect themselves from the "favored" who enjoy exclusion.

[henrypapillon]

12:48 AM on 04/16/2010

I hope the miserable little brats have the rest of their miserable little lives just like they started them. The way you treat others usually comes back to you. It doesn't sound like these kids are off to a start for a good life.

[MystifiedMississippian]

05:31 PM on 04/09/2010

Rumors/pos­ts by students have countered that Constance is attention-­seeking, is not really gay, spread rumors that she was pregnant recently, etc. If they really believe this, what are they saying? Are they saying that she is not gay, but emotionall­y unstable? Are they saying that the good Christians did not oppress a gay person, but chose to oppress an emotionall­y disturbed person? IF, and I strongly say "IF", this were the case, does that improve what the oppressors did?????

[toddges]

05:05 PM on 04/08/2010

When I was a kid I held a New Year’s Party at my home and I invited the entire senior class (about 400 kids). Only about 6 of them showed up. Why? Because I was Baptist kid in a Mormon community. Everyone went to my popular Mormon neighbor’s party instead. Guess what; I got over it!!!!! Nobody gave me a $30 grand scholarshi­p for it, I didn’t get celebrity attention and it didn’t make global news either. I just picked myself up, brushed myself off, and moved on. Let this girl grow up a little, learn some better social skills (like not suing your school over their prom dress code and not referring to your entire town publicly as “backwards hicks”, etc. on TV) and the pain will go away.

[OBroadhurst]

03:28 PM on 04/09/2010

Yes, we should never challenge homophobia­, but instead must revel in it.

[Rober]

03:51 PM on 04/09/2010

And 50 years ago if you had skin color that was not "white" you would not have even had "white" school friends to invite so that they wouldn't show up. Is this really the world you want to live in?

[DirkJohanson]

04:42 PM on 04/08/2010

I'm interested in how many of you supporting Constance would be supportive of a polygamist guy going to the prom with three polygamist chicks, likeTiger Woods and his girls, Jesse James and his girls, Tiki Barber and his girls, or me and my hos. The Guyinism movement (http://guy­inism.com) looks outside the conservati­ve hetero/LGB­T sphere.

[JDinSeattle]

09:31 PM on 04/08/2010

I dunno. Would have been a lot more interestin­g than the jocks & cheerleade­rs!

[MystifiedMississippian]

01:07 AM on 04/09/2010

THAT would be one of those "forgivabl­e" sins, if caught... ;-)

[Vorticose]

02:24 PM on 04/08/2010

For all the bloggers that are not here in Fulton and have no clue of the real story, here it is. Constancie­s has been dating males all her life. Three months ago, she thought she was pregnant. She decided to make this an issue after a cross-dres­sing friend from Iowa was suspended for wearing dresses to school and demanding to use the girl’s restroom. She told her friends that she was going to try to start something by acting as if she was going to wear a tuxedo and bring a girl to the prom. The truth is SHE DID IT FOR THE MONEY!!

[OBroadhurst]

03:30 PM on 04/09/2010

I have absolutely no reason whatsoever to believe an anonymous venom spurting troll who fails to provide documentat­ion of calumnious allegation­s.

[johnb123]

11:04 AM on 04/08/2010

Also consider the source of this story, The Advocate, a gay publicatio­n. Not once in the article do they talk to the other students. Where were they on the night of the prom? Did they go there to get the full story? I don't think so.

[Robert Yager]

12:59 PM on 04/08/2010

Its all in the spin isnt it? lets not cover the parts of the story that will hurt our bias.

[OBroadhurst]

03:31 PM on 04/09/2010

Still at it, are you? The Advocate reported nothing that the local newspaper for the town didn't.

You seem intently focused on Lebophobic apologia, my friend.

[johnb123]

03:31 AM on 04/08/2010

I'd like to know where were Constance McMillen supporters when she was at the prom? So many people complainin­g about what the other students did, yet they never showed up or even called her when she was at the prom.

[MystifiedMississippian]

01:13 AM on 04/09/2010

So, I take it that you spent the evening with Constance, interviewi­ng her to get her side and taking notes regarding with whom she spoke. Your question has been answered at least once.

[David Rozgonyi]

02:09 AM on 04/08/2010

Funny thing: In the end, because of the situation those small-mind­ed hicks put her into, Constance will have done more to advance LGBT rights and awareness in this country than ten of the most die hard LGBT supporters on this board together, including me. Silver lining, what else can I say?

[johnb123]

02:25 AM on 04/08/2010

Sorry, but whatever was gained by her being in the news was wiped out by all the people using terms like "bigots" against anyone supporting the students.

[David Rozgonyi]

02:39 AM on 04/08/2010

Backward, intolerant attitudes and the people who propagate them deserve no support.

[mssisyphus]

12:57 PM on 04/08/2010

Sorry John, but it was not the other students who had a problem with her attending the original prom, it was their parents!

[toddges]

02:04 AM on 04/08/2010

All of Chapter 3 in After th Ball by Marshall Kirk:

Good Propoganda­:

"Portray Gays as Victims of Cirumstanc­e & Oppression­" page 183

"Give Potential Protectors a Just Cause" page 187

"Make Gays Look Good" page 187

"Make Victimizer­s Look Bad" page 189

"Getting Into the Major Media" page 205

[toddges]

11:52 PM on 04/07/2010

Constance got plenty of celebrity attention and Ellen brought her on her talk show and gave her a $30 grand scholarshi­p to a media school (clearly not a cheap one). I'll bet every kid in this town is dirt poor. I'll bet 30 grand is a real fortune to them.

Ellen should have used that money to throw a big bash of a prom for ALL of the kids to enjoy. Then Constance would be popular and the other kids would dump the school's policies in a second. Don't just reward 1 kid for pushing controvers­y onto the others. If you want to help her be accepted then recognize that the other kids wanted a party too. It only bothers them more when you give her a ton of money during a recession. Most those kids will struggle financiall­y to go to college, or not go at all.

Yes, I get it; she's gay and should have been able to go to the prom with her girlfriend­. And that translates into the other kids being at fault HOW? Maybe she could have dropped it initially and just wore a dress to the prom. I don't think she'd be arrested for dancing with another girl. If it was worth national attention and a 30 grand scholarshi­p just to show up in a tux, and it looks like it was, then it's hard to feel too sorry for her.

[David Rozgonyi]

01:54 AM on 04/08/2010

" that translates into the other kids being at fault HOW? "

I'll tell you how: I know a few teens back home in Colorado. Had this happened at their school, I can guarantee that every single one of them would have a) picked up a phone and texted her: hey, dude, you're being duped; we're over here!... and b) jumped in their cars and left the "real" prom to support her at the "real" one. Because they were raised right. But not one of these kids did. Not a single one.

Their parents trained them all too well.

[johnb123]

02:26 AM on 04/08/2010

Wrong, what that tells you is the WHOLE school was fed up with her attitude.

[momof5]

10:41 AM on 04/08/2010

You're so wrong. It means that a bunch if other kids had to suffer because of two. I don't justify discrimina­tion and i have kids. A friend is a friend regardless of their sexual orientatio­n but you making a stand that really was not necessary because you wanted to violate dress code and wear a tux, wear a tux dress- they are out there. Ruin it for everyone else. Self-cente­red, not considerat­e

[FunMe]

04:54 AM on 04/08/2010

Let's pretend it's the 1950s and 1960s:

"I don't know why that n girl wanted to come to our prom. She should have just worn some lily-white clothes and hey, even bleached her skin, so she can fit in with the rest of the school who is primarily white.

Yeah, I get it. She is black, and wants special treatment. Don't blame us who have discrimina­ted against her by not telling her where the real prom is. She is a whiner. She should just shut up and be happy she is black and is in our schools. She should stop hurting us who wanted a prom they way it was originally planned."

FREAKING HOMOPHOBES­!!!!

And bigots and stupid high schoolers and their mom who are NOT patriotic enough to be living in our United States of America.

Sent these BIGOTS who discrimina­ted to Cuba or the Middle East!

Then we can talk about their STUPID thinking and homophobia­.

[momof5]

10:41 AM on 04/08/2010

Really, what prom got canceled back then???

[Siobhan11]

10:39 PM on 04/07/2010

It's been a few days. Noone even reading this anymore. But I feel haunted by it. How do I say this? If they decided to have a party and not invite her, it's pretty ugly. But not deceitful. If they couldn't be honest and tricked her into going to a "fake prom" they are cruel.

Does anyone get my point? Not condoning anything they did, but before at least they were honest about their bigotry. I can't believe I am writing this. But the cruelty of the fake prom just haunts me. And the students with learning disabiliti­es - why weren't they invited to the "other prom".

I go to bed tonight very happy to live where I live. Yeah cold snowy western NY. Where I hear from my teenage neice and nephews that it's no big deal at their public school when someone comes out.

[johnb123]

11:12 PM on 04/07/2010

Define "fake prom"? The school had a prom, the other students boycotted it. She wasn't tricked, she showed up an hour and a half late for it. Everyone there knew the students decided to have a private party, so no one was deceived.

[FunMe]

04:56 AM on 04/08/2010

Go away yoy freaking un-America­n HOMOPHOBE!

[Siobhan11]

07:04 AM on 04/08/2010

I said "if". But the article seems to imply she was deceived. How do you know so much? Are you one of the parents?

If they had the guts to stand up for their conviction­s they would have said there is a 7 person prom for you and the rest of us are going to this other prom. It doesn't seem to have been that straight forward.

And again - the fact the learning disability students were excluded.

[johnb123]

06:55 PM on 04/07/2010

I have a question. If the gay and lesbian community are so supportive of her, why didn't they show up at her prom?

[Matthew Frost]

07:15 PM on 04/07/2010

I am not GAY I just support equal human rights.

Also perhaps because this was a highschool prom not a lesbians of the world convention­.

How hard is that to understand­?

[johnb123]

07:23 PM on 04/07/2010

So it wasn't a big deal to them. I would think there would have been some in the area that would have shown up to support her. NO ONE showed up, not even her supposed supporters­. Seems like she was just a political pawn, all talk but no show.

[Siobhan11]

06:58 AM on 04/08/2010

Perfect answer. Fanned.