Archdiocese Of Boston Welcomes Children Of Gay Parents In Schools

By G. Jeffrey MacDonald
Religion News Service

(RNS) The Archdiocese of Boston says that children of same-sex couples are welcome in its schools, after a local school rejected a student with lesbian parents.

Superintendent of Catholic Schools Mary Grassa O'Neill said the archdiocese will develop a policy to eliminate any misunderstandings about its openness to children of gay parents.

"We believe that every parent who wishes to send their child to a Catholic school should have the opportunity to pursue that dream," O'Neill said in a statement released Thursday (May 13).

Press reports earlier this week quoted an anonymous woman who said administrators at St. Paul Elementary School in Hingham, Mass., had denied admission to her 8-year-old son because his parents' relationship was "in discord with the teachings of the Catholic church."

O'Neill said she spoke Thursday with the Rev. James Rafferty and principal Cynthia Duggan, who oversee St. Paul Elementary School, about their decision. She then contacted one of the child's parents, who according to O'Neill indicated that she would consider sending her son to a different Catholic school in the upcoming school year.

Whether to enroll schoolchildren of same-sex parents is a matter of some debate among the nation's Catholic dioceses. The Sacred Heart of Jesus School in Boulder, Colo. refused to re-enroll a child after they learned the child has same-sex parents last winter. The Archdiocese of Denver supported their decision.

"Parents living in open discord with Catholic teaching in areas of faith and morals unfortunately choose by their actions to disqualify their children from enrollment," said a March statement from the Archdiocese of Denver.

Gay rights advocates applauded the Boston archdiocese's policy announcement.

"We agree 100 percent with that decision" to welcome children of same-sex couples in Catholic schools, said Pam Garramone, executive director of Greater Boston PFLAG, a gay rights education and advocacy group.

Comments

[Randy Shepherd]

10:11 PM on 05/29/2010

there are many gay catholics who disagree with the church, but don't want to give up their religion over it. there is even a gay denomination of the catholic church, called Dignity. it is for gays, and gay friendly people to worship in an inclusive and afirming place.
so i'm not suprised this issue came up in the 1st state to legalize gay marriage. religion is not a major focus like it is in other parts the country. i moved to the midwest, and it is much more on peoples minds as to what relgion you belong to, and do you follow the rules of organized religion. in new england people care about a co-worker, or neighbors relgion about as much as they do knowing if they have pets.

[Madhyamika]

10:29 AM on 05/24/2010

But why did these lesbian couple want to sentence their son to a hostile environment each day - at a Catholic Elementary School! Kids are ordinarily cruel enough to each other elsewhere, but in a Catholic school where all the kids come from families carrying the Catholic hatred of gays? One can only expect worse. It would be tough even for older teens to handle, but to subject a younger child to such situation is inexcusable. These two lesbians are worse than the school officials who rejected them.

[DeuxExMachina]

03:26 AM on 05/25/2010

In the main people commenting here have very little experience of Catholic education and Catholic schools. They assume that the schools are indoctrinating factories. For children who go to Catholic elementary schools the environment is actually very caring and nuturing. As I mentioned before and others have as well, there are no lifestyle lessons in Catholic elementary schools (other than assuming that a child normally has a father and a mother). This is for a couple of reasons. One the Catholic Church is much more than about sexual mores and they want to give the children a solid education, build up their character and teach them Catechism. Secondly, these are elementary schools afterall and the administration and staff assume that students' hormones haven't kicked in yet and they don't have to deal with teeneage issues yet.

[JayJonson]

11:16 AM on 05/27/2010

I certainly would not send my child to a Catholic school, for a variety of reasons, but it is not true that Catholics laypeople are necessary anti-gay. In fact, Catholic laypeople are the most supportive of gay rights of any religious demographic.

[Liberty1967]

07:04 PM on 05/21/2010

It truly amazes me that any good parent would fund the organization that is responsible for massive child-rape, the cover-up of same and continues to attempt to evade responsibility. Or that anyone would send the cute little girl pictured above to a school that would teach her that, should she become pregnant and need an abortion since continuing the pregnancy would kill her, she'd have to face death to be a moral person (not kidding, search "St. Joseph's" for the post). My hope for all these parents is that they become strong and self-loving enough to completly reject and defund the Catholic Church, and leave their children free of it.

Who else are the Catholic schools rejecting? Children of soldiers, for violating "thou shalt not kill?" Everyone whose parents had sex before marriage, aren't married or got a divorce? Didn't think so, they'd be out of "business". Make no mistake, the schools and hospitals are a business. Would you do business with a private organization with the Church's ethics? Or would you boycott?

[DeuxExMachina]

10:17 PM on 05/21/2010

You ask why anyone would send a child to Catholic school.
For Catholics that is an easy answer. We want to send our children to Catholic schools because we want them to have a Catholic Education.
Secondly, by and large Catholic schools provide a caring and nurturing environment and avoid the problems prevalent in many of the public schools.
Thirdly, the fees for Catholic schools are in general less that the secular private schools.
The latter two factors, I suspect, may be the reason why non-Catholics may also want to enroll their children in the Catholic schools (we have Protestants, Buddhists, Hindus, Muslims, etc enrolling).
Children of soldiers are definitely not rejected. After all the doctrine of "a Just War" was Catholic and unfortunately very much misused by politicians. In fact many secondary Catholic schools allow military personnel to visit the school and talk to the older students about the services.
While Catholic parents may not always be true to their faith that does not stop their children from attending Catholic schools. After all, the Christian God is a forgiving one and the Church has the sacrament of confession.

[KennebunkportIndependent]

02:03 PM on 05/22/2010

To boycott a school because I disagree with it would violate the trust that I hold for my child. My child is not a pawn to be used to make a point. My child will go to a school in harmony with my beliefs (which means to be open to all ideas and beliefs).

I would not send my child to a Catholic school because we are not Catholic. I am not impressed if a Catholic school has so watered down its mission statement to the point where it become all-things-for-all-people. That's Catholicism light (which they use to describe my religion, Episcopalianism). This is not what Catholic schools were like when I was growing up. I respect (even if I don't agree) a Catholic school that teaches the Catechism and raises its pupils to be Catholics. The watered-down version that Deux Et Machina describes below is nothing - neither one thing or another. Why bother?? Just for a cheap quasi-private education? Why not drop "Catholic' and call is Universalist - all things for all people??

[chaya]

01:31 PM on 05/21/2010

That's nice. Are they welcoming the gay parents to come in and meet the teachers and join the PTA as well?

[Randy Shepherd]

10:00 PM on 05/29/2010

the PTA, that's a good hypothetical for this situation

[DevonTexas]

01:28 PM on 05/21/2010

PFLAG for the uniformed, is "Parents and Fiends of Lesbians and Gays" . a wonderful supportive group of concerned people.

[brooklyncitizen]

09:29 AM on 05/21/2010

That pic is really adorable.

What a ridiculous argument.

Philosophically speaking it's ironic that gay parents would send their kids to Catholic but it may be more about the calibre of the education offered at a specific school than it's denomination.

It's silly to put kids in the center of this argument.

[rf dude]

01:13 AM on 05/21/2010

Homospenduals and their money are always welcome in the church...
;;

[Giverny]

01:51 PM on 05/20/2010

I'm not part of a gay couple but have friends who are going through similar issues. They Are rejected from the military, they want to serve, they are patriots. They believe in God just like everyone else. It is as if they come from the moon instead of also being God's children. Discrimination of anyone, be it children of gay parents, latino's in Arizona, or anywhere for that matter deserve life as God had given them, without hindrance unless a law is broken. I have had grievous damage done to my family due to being noncatholic (families do not always meld) and native. It is not always easy to rise above it, it can eat your heart away inch by inch but we all have to live in a society where people do not accept other people due to religion, sexual preference, ethnicity, gender bias and assorted other feudal notions. We try to teach our children how to cope and then they end up on tv talking to the presidents wife telling her "the president is sending people away,my mama doesn't have papers." Imagine that families grief today. We just get up in the morning, nurture our families, hope Wall St. doesn't sell us off as slaves while we get through the day in hopes we can all live peacefully raising our children without consequence. We may not have to worry about futures if BP doesn't cap this blowout and even then it may be too late.

[DeuxExMachina]

05:54 PM on 05/20/2010

A commendable attitude to life and others. I believe tolerance one of the requisites for a civil society but I see attitudes hardening. Also greed more than anything else (and that includes religion) drives the world and a small part of the population make off with the bounty. Your pessimism is also not misplaced.

[DeuxExMachina]

12:56 AM on 05/20/2010

So to recap all the comments for this article:
(1) The educational environment is good at Catholic schools
(2) Many Catholics send their children to Catholic schools
(3) Some gay parents want their children to go to Catholic schools.
(4) Catholic schools allow non-Catholics and children of gay parents to enroll at their schools
(5) Some liberals don't like the idea of gay parents putting their children in Catholic schools
(6) Some liberals think gay parents stupid for doing so even when the latter have their reasons
(7) Some liberals wouldn't want anyone to go to Catholic schools.

See the problem here.
While the Catholic Church may have had disagreements with liberals, gay people like ethnic minorities might want to ask themselves whether these pseudo-liberals really have their interests to heart. Until the much broken public school system is remedied many minorities, working-class and white-collar workers will continue to enroll their children in Catholic schools.
Therefore the criticism from the pseudo-liberal detractors can be considered as nothing more than hot air.

[chaya]

01:34 PM on 05/21/2010

Amazing. You just classified every single commenter on this article--over 200 at this point--as a "pseudo-liberal."

It takes my breath away.

[rbryanh]

10:36 PM on 05/19/2010

Let's all applaud the Archdiocese of Boston for not conflating the persecution of LGBTQ people with discrimination against their children. While we're at it, let's give me a cash award for not punching anyone today. (As a gay man who was raised Catholic, the impulse occurs whenever the Cult of Rome comes near.)

When we're through applauding everyone on earth who didn't commit a crime against humanity today, let's talk about LGBTQ parents. Not all of them - just the ones who send their children to schools that will teach them to regard their parents as evil, sick, and headed for hell. Doesn't indoctrinating your children into a cult that fears and hates you make you an unfit parent? (It also strikes me as contracting out your dirty work - can't you teach your child to hate him or herself at home?)

Then let's debate the wisdom of a democracy allowing people who are above civil law and the democratic process to run schools for children.

Just don't give me any crap about the right to "believe." In a democracy which forbids creation of a state religion, any citizen's right to religious freedom ends where any other citizen's civil rights began. Teaching kids to discriminate against minorities is evil and stupid, and teaching them to discriminate against their parents is an abomination on par with child torture and rape.

Oh, sorry... It slipped my mind for a sec. It's so awful I guess I try to block it out.

[JackNasty]

01:23 AM on 05/19/2010

Why would any reasonable parent send his or her child to a Catholic school?

[Giverny]

05:42 PM on 05/19/2010

We all wish to be accepted especially in the faith we were raised. Very few places will offer acceptance to a gay couple raising children.

[DeuxExMachina]

06:28 PM on 05/19/2010

Thank you for your honest answer. And for the benefit of readers, if you are part of a gay couple and have a child in Catholic school what would you say your child's experience is like there?

[rbryanh]

10:38 PM on 05/19/2010

No offense intended, but that's like asking "why would anyone with brown hair rob a bank?"

Faith has nothing at all to do with reason.

[Paulo1]

09:48 AM on 05/18/2010

And why exactly should gay parents send their children to schools where the dogma in religious education teaches them that mom and mom/Dad and dad are immoral? Or where they stand a perfectly good chance of coming into contact with a Catholic Priest? (notoriously prone to child molestation you know)

Good parents do not send their kids to bigotry schools.

[DeuxExMachina]

12:53 AM on 05/19/2010

"....Good parents do not send their kids to bigotry schools. "
So while you're a liberal you would also be judgmental about a gay couple who want to choose the type of school they want their child to go to? After all they may perfectly good reasons for making that choice.

[rbryanh]

10:46 PM on 05/19/2010

Please pause to consider the consequences of indoctrinating a child into a cult which invalidates the child's family and teaches that his or her parents are sick, evil, and will spend eternity sizzling in Satan's french frier, complete with graphic illustrations of the latter.

"So while you're a liberal you would also be judgmental about a gay couple who want to choose the type of school they want their child to go to?"

You're damned right I am. In fact, "judgmental" is much too mild a word. I'm aggressively condemning it with all the facts, reason, and emotion I possess.

There is no justification, religious or otherwise, for teaching a child self loathing. It's abusive: the torture and rape of a soul. Physical torture and rape may be the most heinous crimes Catholicism perpetrates against children, but being made to hate your family and yourself runs a very close second.

[dpavsek]

04:49 AM on 05/18/2010

"Parents living in open discord with Catholic teaching in areas of faith and morals unfortunately choose by their actions to disqualify their children from enrollment," said a March statement from the Archdiocese of Denver which really means a statement from Archbishop Chaput.

Does this mean that the schools will not accept any student whose parents are divorced? who practice birthcontrol? who support capital punishment? who are pro-choice? who believe women should be ordained? who want optional celibacy for priests? And the list goes on.

Well it doesn't mean that at all. It is simply the homophobia of man in skirts who would know consistency in thinking if it hit him in the face. Of course if he followed the logic of his statement then there would be no students available for catholic schools.

[DeuxExMachina]

12:55 AM on 05/19/2010

So you've just made the discovery that the Catholic Church is more forgiving then you realized?

[Liberty1967]

06:55 PM on 05/21/2010

It's not. It just picks its talking points/battles. If they had to reject all of the above (and many things they'd have no way of knowing about), they'd be out of business. Come to think of it, they should get very strict right away, and start rejecting the children of military families for violating 'thou shalt not kill'.

[Hysterian68]

01:30 AM on 05/18/2010

These vile and disgusting perverts in their golden pointey hats are feeling the pinch of public disdain and disgust. If the treatment of children, gays, and women will not lead to the laity's revulsion and outrage against the perpetrators, then there is nothing that will shock the Catholic faithful from their lethargy, passivity, and stupidity.

The time has come to cut off the pederast protectors from their mother's milk, their source of sustenance: your cash and coins ringing in the collection plate.

[DeuxExMachina]

12:57 AM on 05/19/2010

Blah, blah, blah.....

[ThemBones]

08:37 PM on 05/17/2010

I find it hard to believe gay parents would want there children in a Catholic school. Then again stupidity is abundant and without prejudice.

[DeuxExMachina]

12:59 AM on 05/19/2010

Again judgmental and intolerant.

[ThemBones]

05:48 AM on 05/19/2010

How so? We all know the CC hates gays, this is no secret. I do find it odd that they would willingly put their children in a place that openly berates homosexuality. Where in my post was I intolerant of anyone? Calling stupid people stupid is not intolerant, it is like stating the sky is blue. I think it is a good thing to allow this, I'm just a little unsure why the parents involved would want their children in such a place.

[rbryanh]

10:48 PM on 05/19/2010

And 100% correct.

The spiritual torture and rape of a child should be judged and must not be tolerated.