The release of over 90,000 secret military documents on the war in Afghanistan has woken the media up to how the war is really going, and last night Jon Stewart got to weigh in on the scandal himself. As any sane person would think, Stewart speculated that a security breach of this magnitude must have been carried about by highly efficient, almost ninja-like informants who used stealth tactics to obtain the information and leak it to the site WikiLeaks.org.
Oh, how wrong he was. No, these extremely sensitive documents revealing the Afghanistan war's many problems were leaked by none other than an Army intelligence analyst with the screen name "BradAss87." And his stealthy operation revolved around downloading the intelligence to an erased Lady Gaga CD, all the while lip syncing to the songs while it saved. This led Stewart to ask, "How does a soldier sit around lip syncing to Lady Gaga all day, and not run afoul of 'don't ask don't tell'? That has GOT to be a substitute for telling, no?"
While Stewart sat in disbelief over the new intelligence, including information on suicide bombings, civilian deaths, and even how Pakistan is helping insurgents in Afghanistan, what really set him off was the media's nonchalance. Stewart showed clip after clip of pundits essentially saying the information is "nothing new." Stewart fired back; "I'm not responding to the 'newness' of the reports - I'm responding to the 'fucked-upedness' of it!"