Best. Resume. Ever. (PHOTO)

The job market is rough, so we wouldn't be surprised if many employers are getting these kinds of "amazing" resumes on a daily basis. This guy seems like the perfect employee! Aside from finding the time to attend every ivy league school under the sun (and Devry!), he seems to know all the right things to say to get hired. He should have no problem meeting his stated objectives, including the acquisition of a sweet commemorative coin collection, and who would deny a job to a former employee of "The Newspaper" who won a "Puletsur" prize? Just don't look for references, since they all burned in one, big fire. Genius. (Via Reddit)

Comments

[CitizenIndie]

02:40 AM on 09/08/2010

"Commishio­ner"???

Not the best resume ever.

[BuckyJamesDio]

10:09 PM on 09/07/2010

This would have been funny if it were actually funny.

[Enimal57]

12:58 AM on 09/06/2010

We are all intelligen­t here, are'nt we? Why do we then keep asking if it is a prank or a joke?

[Dillinger13]

08:32 AM on 09/06/2010

I guess the answer is, no we are clearly not all intelligen­t here, you and I may be, however, those who believed this to be real, sadly, are not.

[AllenPapapetrou]

06:33 AM on 09/07/2010

Even asking the question could be interprete­d as a lack of intellectu­al fiber.

Allen

[fromflorida]

03:16 PM on 09/05/2010

HuffPost, this is getting really embarrassi­ng, how can you be so good at news and so bad at humor?

[skantea]

01:12 AM on 09/08/2010

Part of the success of a website is in keeping the end user on the site as long as possible (I.E. Amazon).
Also it's the clicks that count when adjusting Ad rates.

[fromflorida]

02:20 AM on 09/08/2010

Is that the reason for the slideshow format?

[metropolitan]

12:34 PM on 09/05/2010

with a 555 phone number and a main street address is obviously a lame joke resume.

[Epiphany2b]

01:13 PM on 09/05/2010

That happens a lot with things in the comedy section.

[Marla Thurman]

01:43 PM on 09/05/2010

Well, duh. That was your only clue?

[seachild]

12:19 PM on 09/05/2010

headline.n­ot.true

[Marla Thurman]

01:44 PM on 09/05/2010

Agreed. Few HuffPo headlines are true, though.

[eXpresso]

02:58 PM on 09/05/2010

x2

[Sapphire Rose]

12:04 PM on 09/05/2010

Wow.. This is so believable­... Yawn

[bafeet]

12:00 PM on 09/05/2010

I love the fact that he will take part of his compensati­on in commemorat­ive coins...a savy HR person could negotiate part of the salary in commemorat­ive plates as well

[Califishing]

01:09 AM on 09/06/2010

Doesn't Glen Beck promote Gold Coins?

[bafeet]

11:24 AM on 09/06/2010

hmmm, well I'm not sure, I don't watch him but it would be pretty funny if he had some coins with his mug on them

[PresidentRobertBooth]

11:35 AM on 09/05/2010

My resume:

- Willing to work. Promises not to steal.




The end.

[gypsysailor]

02:54 PM on 09/05/2010

Sorry, we're looking for a rip-off artist. Someone who can take down the elderly and poor. Someone who is not afraid to dupe the gullible. If you change your mind and morals, please contact us again. Sincerely, the Republican Party.

[MrKrispee]

11:09 AM on 09/05/2010

Whoever wrote it: obviously a joke. Come on, Huffpost, stop posting "joke" things as if the originals were sincere.

[Jerrodg]

11:12 AM on 09/05/2010

Did you really have trouble figuring out that was a joke?

[Epiphany2b]

01:15 PM on 09/05/2010

You know . . . usually when one sees an item in the comedy section, one tends to expect things to be a joke. That's what comedy is, things written to be sarcastic, droll, funny, ironic, that sort of stuff.

[MrKrispee]

04:09 PM on 09/06/2010

Actually, there are plenty of links, pictures and stories in the Comedy section that are REAL, and the reason they are funny is because they are real and not faked, or a parody or a conscious joke. So "one" would not expect it to be a joke necessaril­y. One might expect it to be FUNNY, but that might be dependent upon it NOT being done on purpose. It's all about context. This one fails.

[sempronia]

10:00 AM on 09/05/2010

I think I actually know real people whose resumes would read "Ivy, Ivy, Distinguis­hed European University­, Television­-advertise­d business school". It usually accompanie­s a useless major for which he or she worked harder than everyone else and, in the end, is still useless.

[m1jones]

11:00 PM on 09/06/2010

The main reason to go to a top business school (usually never advertised - they are innundated with great applicants­) is because of the network of friends and contacts you make while there and through the alumni organizati­on and continuing education programs. The networks are worth every penny of the tuition.

[sempronia]

07:20 AM on 09/07/2010

Oh, I'd believe it. Also applies to academia.

[Big0725]

09:32 AM on 09/05/2010

Gotta love truth in advertisin­g.

[Cowoak]

09:27 AM on 09/05/2010

That wasn't funny, maybe cute but not funny.

[Epiphany2b]

01:18 PM on 09/05/2010

Funny, as with beauty, is an individual concept. One really is not qualified to pass judgment on what is funny as a whole. I thought it was funny.

[Marla Thurman]

01:45 PM on 09/05/2010

I didn't laugh, either.

[TucsonDean]

05:05 AM on 09/05/2010

My resume is straight forward, serious, and verifiable­, but on job applicatio­ns, I always respond to the "Who shall we contact in case of emergency?­" question with "911."

[Epiphany2b]

01:19 PM on 09/05/2010

Oh what a wonderful idea! I'm stealing (okay, borrowing) it!!

[Marla Thurman]

01:47 PM on 09/05/2010

When evangelist­s came to our door once and asked my 12-year old sister, "If you got hit by a truck right now, where would you go?" she said, "Probably to a hospital."

Love your answer.

[shirleyfeeney]

03:11 AM on 09/05/2010

He's asking for a starting salary of $8.65 an hour with THOSE qualificat­ions? hahahahaha­ha!