6 Ways To Turn Acceptances Into Rejections (PHOTOS)

From Writer's Relief:

After years and years of watching our client list receive hundreds of acceptances per cycle, the staff of Writer's Relief finally understands what it's like to be, like... totally sick of all those positive responses from journals and agents. Who wants to get published anyway, right?

So if you loathe seeing your work in print and enjoy making paper castles out of all those form rejections, read on. We'll tell you the quickest ways to make sure you'll never have to look at an acceptance letter again!

Not buying this? Understandable. If so, you may want to check out our article: New Writers: 10 Tips To Turn Rejections Into Acceptances.

Remember, there may come a day when you might actually want to get published -- there are only so many papier-mâché figurines you can make out of form rejections anyway. When that day comes, call us! Writer's Relief knows a thing or two about creating targeted submissions and letters that can get your work published the right way.

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We Don't Need No Stinkin' Cover Letters

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Surely your work can speak for itself. As long as you’ve scribbled your name and phone number somewhere on the page, you’ll be fine. This works especially well for literary agents. They don’t need a synopsis or cover letter—and if they don’t feel like looking you up in the phone book, that’s their problem, not yours.

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Surely your work can speak for itself. As long as you’ve scribbled your name and phone number somewhere on the page, you’ll be fine. This works especially well for literary agents. They don’t need a synopsis or cover letter—and if they don’t feel like looking you up in the phone book, that’s their problem, not yours.

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Comments

[thepointoforigin]

05:59 PM on 09/24/2010

Good advice

[MaryDiane Hausman]

11:24 AM on 09/23/2010

Great article!!! Writer's Relief staff ROCKS!!!

[CristineN]

10:15 AM on 09/23/2010

...had to be said! loved it!

[betsyhenning]

06:45 PM on 09/22/2010

Sarcasm does drive the point home. But are you saying... maybe I shouldn't have queried the New Yorker first? No problem I'll just email, call, snail mail and ask them to send it back a.s.a.p. ;-)

[KristenT]

12:29 PM on 09/22/2010

For more writers' comic relief, you're invited to visit the PaperRats YouTube channel, where you'll find 5.5 episodes of "Inside the Writers' Studio." http://www.youtube.com/user/paperrats

[dove95]

11:49 AM on 09/22/2010

How cool is this! Love the snark :)