Stephen Colbert Gives Martha Stewart Cooking Lessons (VIDEO)

Stephen Colbert had a special guest on "The Colbert Report" last night: crafty homemaking queen Martha Stewart. Colbert, who appeared on Stewart's show two years ago, caught up with her on a festively decorated kitchen set and asked her questions like, "What are we gluing beads to acorns with these days?"

The two started talking about Thanksgiving and Colbert learned Stewart's slightly more humane way of slaughtering her turkeys: she feeds them airplane-sized bottles of cognac beforehand. Then Colbert decided to give the cooking guru a few lessons of her own, and shared with her the recipes from his economically-challenged youth. We hope you like Wonder Bread with mayonnaise and pre-sweetened Kool AId mix on top, because that's what's on the menu in this clip.

WATCH:

Comments

[adamben]

10:22 PM on 11/21/2010

yummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmy!!!

[JamesBondQuixote]

11:56 PM on 11/15/2010

Heh, that naughty Stephen licking the food off so close to Martha's double vineyards! Hilarious and sexy!

[Artos]

08:11 PM on 11/15/2010

My Favorite Sandwich is made like this. Two slices of Rye or Pumpernickel, not the American style but German. Then cover them both with Limburger Cheese, Then put in Broiler for about 5 to ten minutes or until cheese is melty. Next put a generous dose of Sauerkraut on top of that. Grill a couple of slices of onions in a frying pan using Olive oil, mix in some fresh garlic, once the two have been sauteed to perfection arrange over the Sauerkraut. On top of that you'll want to spread some Chanterelles that have previously been sauteed in butter. As a final touch throw a few Anchovies and pepperocinis on top of that. You can either sautee them as well or just fresh out of the can. Slap your two halves of the bread together stick them in the oven and broil for an other 15 minutes and Voila you have a masterpiece. I call it the Blitzkrieg. Bon Appetit.

[bobb88]

06:00 PM on 11/15/2010

Stephen forgot Velveta with just about anything.

[P0liticalGenius]

04:14 PM on 11/15/2010

Saltines with Tuna Fish, Mayo, Paprika, Pepper, and relish mmmmmm haha :D.

[TracyA]

12:29 PM on 11/15/2010

Ha! Saltines aside, the mayo and yellow mustard mixture is absolutely essential for a yummy and delicious Cuban sandwich!

[Obeah]

10:28 AM on 11/13/2010

That was a great segment!

[Ljilja]

03:02 PM on 11/12/2010

Martha Stewart played along - admirably! I don't think I would have done as well.

Very funny!

http://graciouslivingdaybyday.com/

[WarriorLemming]

03:58 PM on 11/12/2010

Ljila, how to say this gently.....everyone of your posts you are hawking your website do you get a financial reward for increased traffic?

[dengal]

11:34 AM on 11/12/2010

what a good sport she is.....great segment

[sandystranger]

11:17 AM on 11/12/2010

We did the white bread, butter and sugar thing. My mom put oleo on every sandwich she made. She made a bologna sandwich for my sister's lunch with oleo and mayo - my sister thought the mayo had spoiled and threw her lunch away!

[Kikay Go]

09:35 AM on 11/12/2010

Hilarious! Martha was a good sport.

[dansup]

03:07 AM on 11/12/2010

Steven just keeps getting better and better

Stewart, not so much

[nabsentia23]

09:35 PM on 11/11/2010

Oh Stephen! The segment you just did with Martha Stewart was awesome. Although, I have to admit that it grossed me out for the most part.

Let me tell you why. When I was growing up in upstate NY, I knew a family that was poorer than my own. This was despite the fact that my mother was the sole wage owner of our lil’ African American family of two (just her and me...end of story). This was the 1970s, dude.

Yet, my mother and I knew of another African-American family even poorer than we were. This family wanted to celebrate a birthday of one of their numerous family members. They had baked a cake, but couldn’t afford a proper frosting of just shortening and sugar, so they opted for mayonnaise.

As a child just going through the 2nd grade at the time; I really thought that this was totally gross. However, in my later life, I would come to fully appreciate mayonnaise, but only with meat with bread, vegetables and/or pasta.

So, when you mixed the mayonnaise with the sugar-added Kool-Aid with Martha Stewart, it reminded me of this special time in my childhood.

All of this happened in Syracuse, NY…a GOP stronghold (even in the 1970s when I was just born) And yes, New York is technically a "blue state." However, you couldn't tell that from my birthplace of Syracuse, NY. Just ask Richard Gere. He may agree with me on this.

[Anahid]

12:54 PM on 11/14/2010

Thank you for your story. Fanned

[SaraRose]

09:27 PM on 11/11/2010

In our brown lunch bags, the sandwich was 2 slices of white bread spread with margarine and a slice of bologna. My mother thought prepackaged food was the cat's pajamas.

[stayinschool]

05:43 PM on 11/11/2010

I loved this segment!