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Michelle Williams: 'I'm Not Trying To Fill' Absence Of Heath Ledger (PHOTO)

01/12/2011 12:17 pm ET | Updated May 25, 2011

Michelle Williams opened up about the loss of ex fiance Heath Ledger, and trying to date again in its wake, in the cover story for this month's Marie Claire Magazine. It's not easy, she says, and isn't sure it's possible.

Speaking about various short-lived relationships over the past few years -- including one with director Spike Jonze -- Williams talks about how she approaches happiness, relationships (cautionary, because her parents were divorced), and helping to provide a good environment for her and Ledger's daughter, Matilda.

"Very obviously, for me and for her, there's a hole in our life." Williams says. "Of course the natural inclination is to want to fill it and make it disappear, but what I've come to recently is that it's impossible.

"Nothing will fit in that hole because what we want back we can't get, which is this one person," Williams continued. "I'm not going to rush anything and scamper around like a mad person and make myself crazy. I'm trying to be respectful of the absence. I'm not trying to fill it up. It is what it is."

One person that hasn't filled the hole -- because they haven't dated -- is 'Blue Valentine' co-star Ryan Gosling.

"My poor mom really wants me to meet someone," she says. "I think she wanted to believe the Ryan Gosling rumor more than anybody," she says.

In December, Williams spoke to Nightline about Ledger, but was unhappy with how they edited the interview, saying she was "devastated" with what aired.

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