Drunks still regale you with their unasked-for recollections of "where I was on 9/11." . . . Twenty-four-hour Duane Reades tempt you to bust out of bed in the middle of the night to buy more nail polish remover. . . . You get a text during lunch, then realize it's from the person you're lunching with!
Chants of "I love living somewhere where the seasons change" grow really old after the fifth blizzard in a row. . . . We're the only city in America whose mayor never gets caught in a sordid sex scandal. Doesn't he ever fuck?
People are always in your face with their unsolicited two cents. ("Why aren't you wearing a helmet?" they screech. I yell back: "Why don't you wear condoms?") . . .
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