Oh, hey, model Candice Swanepoel.
The last time we saw you, everyone was talking about how "scary skinny" you are, with your "stick-figure legs and bony arms." But then you assured us that you were happy and healthy...you didn't mention that Victoria's Secret had created the Miraculous Multi-way Push-up Bandeau Top just for you!
It adds "up to two full cup sizes for maximum cleavage and fullness." And two slabs of bizarro shoulder fat for some extra padding between you and the overly-critical press at your next photo shoot. Miraculous, indeed.
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