Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver Separation: Scenes From A Marriage

On Monday night, California’s former Governor and first lady announced their split after 25 years of marriage. “After a great deal of thought, reflection, discussion and prayer, we came to this decision together,” they said in a joint statement.

We have to say, we didn’t see it coming: Unlike so many political marriages which have been marred by scandal as of late, the union of Schwarzenegger, 63, and Shriver, 55, seemed rock solid. Sure, they were always somewhat of an odd couple—he the Republican bodybuilder-turned movie star, she the brainy Democrat member of the Kennedy dynasty—but in the quarter-century they spent together, they seem to have weathered it all, from multiple election campaigns to sexual misconduct allegations to state budget crises to parental deaths, all the while raising four kids. This was a pair who earned their frequent power couple designation in spades, not unlike that other longtime political duo who surprised the world with their split last year.

According to their statement, the two are living apart “while we work on the future of our relationship” (the Los Angeles Times reports that Shriver moved out of their Brentwood mansion a few weeks ago, just months after Schwarzenegger finished serving two terms as Governor). It was not immediately clear whether they would be filing for divorce.

Below, some highlights from their lifetime together.

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• Wedding

  In an April 25, 1986 file photo Actor Arnold Schwarzenegger poses with his bride Maria Shriver following their wedding ceremony in Hyannis, Mass. (AP Photo/file)

• "Batman And Robin" Premiere

  Batman and Robin actor, Arnold Schwarzenegger, arrives with his wife, Maria Shriver, at Mann's Village and Bruin Theater for the world premier of Batman and Robin 12 June in Los Angeles. (HECTOR MATA/AFP/Getty Images/June 12, 1997)

• 70th Annual Academy Awards

  Actor Arnold Schwarzenegger (L) and his wife reporter Maria Shriver (R) arrive for the 70th Annual Academy Awards 23 March in Los Angeles, CA. (HECTOR MATA/AFP/Getty Images/March 24, 1998)

• Arnold Schwarzenegger's Mom's Funeral

  Austrian born actor Arnold Schwarzenegger, right, accompanied by his wife Maria Shriver, left, follow the coffin of his mother Aurelia Schwarzenegger, Wednesday August 5 1998 in his hometown Weiz in southern Austria. Aurelia died Sunday August 2, of a heart attack. (AP Photo/Helge O. Sommer/August 5, 1998)

• Memorial Mass For John F. Kennedy Jr. and Carolyn Bessette Kennedy

  Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver leave a reception at the Sacred Heart Convent School following a memorial Mass for John F. Kennedy Jr. and Carolyn Bessette Kennedy in New York Friday, July 23, 1999. (AP Photo/Suzanne Plunkett/July 23, 1999)

• Premiere of "The 6th Day"

  Austrian-born US actor Arnold Schwarzenegger arrives at the premiere of his new film 'The 6th Day' with his wife Maria Shriver in Los Angeles, 13 November 2000. (LUCY NICHOLSON/AFP/Getty Images/November 13, 2000)

• 60th Golden Globes

  Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver at the 60th Golden Globes at the Beverly Hilton Hotel in Beverly Hills, Ca. Sunday, Jan. 19, 2003. Photo by Kevin Winter/ImageDirect.

• "Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines" Premiere

  Arnold Schwarzenegger, right, and his wife Maria Shriver, pose for photographers at the world premiere of "Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines" in the Westwood section of Los Angeles, Monday, June 30, 2003. (AP Photo/Chris Pizzello)

• Applying To Run For Governor

  Clerk Tanya Ramirez laughs as Arnold Schwarzenegger files his papers to run for governor of California as his wife Maria Shriver looks on at the Los Angeles County Hall of Records office in Norwalk, Calif., Saturday, Aug. 9, 2003. (AP Photo/Reed Saxon)

• Opening of Schwarzenegger for Governor volunteer headquarters

  Arnold Schwarzenegger kisses his wife Maria Shriver after he officially opened the Schwarzenegger for Governor volunteer headquarters at its opening night party in Santa Monica Sept. 5, 2003. (AP Photo/Reed Saxon)

• Appearing On "The Oprah Winfrey Show"

  In this handout photo, actor and California gubernatorial candidate Arnold Schwarzenegger and his wife Maria Shriver appear live on 'The Oprah Winfrey Show's' season premiere September 15, 2003 in Chicago, Illinois. It is their first interview together as a couple since he announced his bid for governor of California. (Photo by George Burns/Harpo Productions via Getty Images/September 13, 2003)

• On the Campaign Trail

  Republican gubernatorial candidate Arnold Schwarzenegger kisses his wife Maria Shriver during a rally at P-R Farms October 4, 2003 in Clovis, California. Schwarzenegger continues on his four-day bus tour through California that began in San Diego and ends in Sacramento. There are six buses in the tour, all named after Schwarzenegger films. (Photo by Justin Sullivan/Getty Images/October 4, 2003)

• Celebrating Gubernatorial Victory

  Republican Arnold Schwarzenegger is joined by wife Maria Shriver as he celebrates his victory in the California gubernatorial recall election in Los Angeles, Tuesday, Oct. 7, 2003. (AP Photo/Stephan Savoia)

• Taking Oath

  Arnold Schwarzenegger kisses his wife Maria Shriver after he took the oath of office as California's 38th governor on the steps of the Capitol in Sacramento, Monday, Nov. 17, 2003. (AP Photo/Eric Risberg)

• Special Election

  Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger looks over at his wife Maria Shriver as he speaks during his election night party in Los Angeles, Tuesday, Nov. 8, 2005. The fifth statewide special election in state history pits the Republican actor-turned-governor against two of California's dominant political forces, labor unions and the Democrats who control both houses of the Legislature. (AP Photo/Kevork Djansezian)

• Watching Election Returns

  Calif. Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger, third from left, is joined from left by daughter Catherine, 16, mother-in-law Eunice Shriver, wife Maria Shriver, son Patrick, 13, daughter Christina, 15, and son Christopher, 9, as they watch election returns Tuesday, Nov. 7, 2006 in Beverly Hills, Calif. Schwarzenegger defeated Democrat Phil Angelides to claim a second term, capping a yearlong comeback. (AP Photo/Chris Carlson,pool)

• Re-election Win

  California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger kisses his wife Maria Shriver after being re-elected in the midterm elections during a celebration at the Beverly Hills Hilton hotel, November 7, 2006. Hollywood star Arnold Schwarzenegger won a spectacular election sequel November 7, giving Republicans something to cheer about on a night of Democratic dominance in key non-congressional battles. (GABRIEL BOUYS/AFP/Getty Images)

• Taking Oath--Again

  California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger, left, takes his oath of office as his wife Maria Shriver looks on in Sacramento, Calif, Friday, Jan. 5, 2007. (AP Photo/Steve Yeater)

• Inaugural Ball

  California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger and his wife Maria Shriver looks on at the Governor's Inaugural Ball at the Sacramento Convention Center January 5, 2007 in Sacramento California. Schwarzenegger was sworn-in today for a second term as governor. (Photo by Brian Baer-Pool/Getty Images)

• Maria Shriver's Women's Conference

  Maria Shriver and Governor of California Arnold Schwarzenegger walk during Maria Shriver's Women's Conference at the Long Beach Convention Center on October 24, 2010 in Long Beach, California. (Photo by Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images)

• R. Sargent Shriver's Funeral

  Maria Shriver, right, and her husband, actor and former California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger, stand amid family members and other mourners as they leave the funeral Mass for her father, R. Sargent Shriver, at Our Lady of Mercy Catholic church in Potomac, Md., just outside Washington, Saturday, Jan. 22, 2011. Shriver, the man responsible for launching the Peace Corps after marrying into the Kennedy family, died last Tuesday at age 95 after suffering from Alzheimer's disease for years. (AP Photo/J. Scott Applewhite)

• Shriver Talks "Transitions"

  On March 28, Shriver wrote on her Facebook page that she was going through a transition. "As you know, transitions are not easy. I'd love to get your advice on how you've handled transitions in your own life," she said in a video posted on YouTube.

Comments

[novabird]

10:35 PM on 05/24/2011

I never fail to be shocked at how wealthy, smart, talented and beautiful women get cheated on by their boyfriends and husbands.

[jettymichael]

04:39 PM on 05/24/2011

I cant stop laughing at Arnie!!!

[Passage Points]

02:55 PM on 05/19/2011

We can't rush transition. We need time to release feelings, incubate, and even flounder a bit. Even though transition brings confusion, doubt, and fear, it also sparks new ideas, creative possibilities and reinvention. Don't bulldoze your way out. Put your ear down to your soul and listen closely.

Look backward: What are my essential strengths and talents? What feeds my soul?
Look inward: What are my dreams? Values?
Look forward: What is my vision for my life in a year?
Ask yourself, "What's next?" instead of "Why me?" or "What's the use?"
Explore, experiment and believe in yourself.
"To exist is to change, to change is to mature; to mature is to go on creating oneself endlessly." (Henri Bergson, French philosopher)

A great book re life transition is "When the Heart Waits" by Sue Monk Kidd. Kidd writes beautifully, taking a spiritual approach to her own transition as a writer and woman. It has inspired me in navigating life transitions and has been a steady resource as I help others.

Sparking possibilities,
V. Field, Passage Points

[gunthli]

09:50 AM on 06/08/2011

Perfect response- I couldn't have said it better. I have torn my life to pieces many times and thrown them in the air and always come out on the positive side. You've been a wonderful wife, mother and companion for 25 years. If anyone can do this Maria, you can. All of our hearts are breaking for such a beautiful and talented woman who was significantly betrayed by her husband. You can do this Maria, and we are all pushing for you. Take some time, talk to your children (you have raised them well) and you will come out better than before.

I'm sure you've had a million job offers since the split, but don't make any commitments until you've had at least 6 months to heal and recover; you need that time and take more if you want. A divorce of any length is like a death; you need time to heal from it. Reach out to your friends - they will help you too. And don't be afraid to cry - it gets the bad stuff out; I cry and throw paper towels (so as not to destroy anything I like!). Find a good counselor - they can be of tremendous help. Think about what made you happiest in life, besides your children, and do that for a while. You will be fine and come out shining; I feel it in my soul.

Fanned and faved for your thoughtful and eloquent post.

[DrLaurieMoore]

10:58 AM on 05/19/2011

My main point in the CNN.com interview (What Happens After Fidelity) was not to dismiss fully valid feelings of the one who is hurt …nor to dismiss feelings of one who gave hurt. In these situations everyone hurts. Healing is POSSIBLE. I have worked with this situation often as a therapist.

We have all been the source of another’s hurt at some time. When we are very hurt, forgiveness of other and reflection of self, are valuable. This takes time. I have often prayed that those who hurt me, receive forgiveness. This has cleansed my heart to neutrality and unconditional love. I have been told this isn't realistic. I SAY THIS IS REALISTIC & the essence of BEING ON THIS PLANET IN peace. It’s an option.

I speak universally to a commen problem. When I have hurt others I apologized, prayed, looked for ways to become a better person. This also goes a long way. We have all caused hurt and been hurt. We can change. We can forgive. We can return to love in the honest facing of all else that emerges within us.

As for Maria and Arnold specifically~ it is not any of our business. They must make their choices in their own ways and timings. They deserve only respect, love and care from all of us as they go through their journeys.

I have helped couples to recover from infidelity and find a greater love together OR apart. It happens both ways.

~Dr. Laurie Moore

[Hank Baylis]

11:42 PM on 05/14/2011

if i was a waiter at an italian restaurant in brentwood, i would not take Maria her mother's eyeglasses that were left behind.

[Matt Mackinnon]

09:33 PM on 05/13/2011

"Maria, my might heart is breaking"

(simpsons fans will get it)

[Teresa Linton]

03:33 PM on 05/13/2011

most of these marriages are a sham at least in the final years. they want to be the smiling family while they are in office and then the truth comes out; they also have the money to live in separate houses, go on vacations year round and basically ignore each other while the rest of us have to argue in 2000 square feet homes.

[Janet Petkin]

10:51 PM on 05/12/2011

. Any transition demands a very CLEAR DECISION.
We make the best decision we can at any given moment. When up against a wall that is insurmountable, and when the world behind you is in trouble: let goal of both: reach DEEP INSIDE INTO YOUR CHARACTER AND VALUES: stop, think, listen, evaluate what is important for you and your family. When the answer comes from the gut, the mind,and your emotions and all three are aligned: then go ahead with a decision. Until that alignment comes: DO NOTHING, WAIT, WAIT SO YOU DON'T MAKE A FATAL ERROR.
It may be stressful not knowing what you are doing next: YOU ARE REGROUPING SO YOU DON'T MAKE A WRONG DECISION AND A WRONG TRANSITION. it is not what you wish you would have known....because you can't go back: it is making a decision to hold up and not mess up what you have BUILT.
When the going gets tough the most important thing is to know what you want and hold tight during a tsunami. If you want to live :hold tight as the water covers you.Hold tight to your belief in what you have built. Hold tight to your life. Hold tight to what is yours and yours only.
What is past and what is next does not matter. Now matters.

It is important to separate the world from you personally..
Sometimes doing Nothing is the correct thing to do. Sometimes just enduring is the correct move.

[HelloFunnyWorld]

06:49 PM on 05/17/2011

A truly nice comment, JP. Good advice, for any one, for every one. Hope she sees it.
We only just heard and feel really bad for them, for her. This must be so hard!

[sue denim]

03:31 PM on 05/11/2011

She should go back into television. I could see her on the View, replacing Barbara Walters, or maybe on CNN or 20/20 doing special reports.

[mamala4]

10:20 PM on 05/11/2011

great ideas....

[ArtsyJane]

08:40 AM on 05/11/2011

People need to stop looking at divorce or separation as a failure. It sometimes is, and sometimes it is not. People grow, they change and this transformational period is part of that growth, rather than a failure. It doesn't necessarily invalidate the 25 years of marriage, nor does it take away the quality of the reltionship.

Really, people need to stop seeing things in terms of good/bad or success/failure. It's an awfully poor way to view life.

[HelloFunnyWorld]

06:54 PM on 05/17/2011

Another nice comment.
And so true.
On behalf of all readers: Thanks for a good reminder that -" seeing things in terms of good/bad or success/failure." ....... is..... "an awfully poor way to view life."

[ArtsyJane]

08:37 AM on 05/11/2011

I like the name Maria.

[Box500]

07:31 AM on 05/11/2011

I hear Arnold is getting a lot of crap in the press about his recent trip to Napa with buddies, drinking wine, eating at expensive restaurants, smoking cigars, riding Harleys. But if a woman takes a post-divorce trip to a spa with her girlfriendss, is she "reclaiming" her life, "finding" herself again, "growing", "transitioning"? Men...stay single!!!

[thedeb7]

07:51 PM on 05/17/2011

I think he is getting crap because he slept with an employee in their house and fathered a child with her.

[jozie]

04:26 AM on 05/11/2011

I never could understand what she saw in him, but to each his or her own. Her parents were such incredible role models, I'm sure her next step will be a good one.

[Krisgi]

04:02 AM on 05/11/2011

They were an example of how different political ideologies couldn´t interfere with love.

So much for that mojo working.

[Hookedonfashion]

04:26 PM on 05/25/2011

I know from experience it doesn't work. I married my husband in 1987, 1 year after the Schwarzeneggers, and I could only stand it for 10 years. I had to get out or I would have gone insane.

[jsgaetano]

01:06 AM on 05/11/2011

His complete failure as a politician must have put a serious strain on their marriage.

[Frances Partridge]

01:24 PM on 05/11/2011

With his ego, he must have been impossible to live with.