All arrivals in Heaven have to go through a bureaucratic examination to determine whether admission will be granted. One room has a clerk who inputs computerized records of what each applicant did on his or her last day of life.
One day, the first applicant of the morning explained that his last day was not a good one. "I came home early and found my wife lying naked in bed," he began. "She claimed she had just gotten out of the shower. Well, her hair was dry, and I checked the shower and it was completely dry, too. I knew she was into some hanky-panky, so I began to look for her lover. I went onto the balcony of our 9th floor apartment and found the SOB clinging to the rail by his fingertips. I was so angry that I began bashing his fingers with a flower pot. He let go and plummeted, but his fall was broken by some awnings and bushes. On seeing he was still alive, I found superhuman strength, and dragged our antique cedar chest to the balcony and threw it over. It landed right on the man and killed him instantly. At this moment, the stress finally got to me and I suffered a massive heart attack and died."
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