Huffpost Comedy

McSweeney's: Fragments from 'Weiner! The Musical'

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WEINER

[ANTHONY WEINER sits at home, bored.]
ANTHONY WEINER
I was an early bloomer
I started with Chuck Schumer
As his protégée
That's my résumé.
[ANTHONY WEINER goes to the window, still bored, and sings.]
ANTHONY WEINER
So many nights I feel nervous
This life I've led of public service
Has left me feeling dull and out of sorts
I've read some books. I've watched some sports
But evening drags. The sun's long set
Should I just go to sleep? Not yet.
[ANTHONY WEINER, pacing his apartment, spies a computer. Evidently he has not seen one before.]
ANTHONY WEINER
What is this box with wires and screen,
This intoxicating machine?
I will sit down and touch a key
Oh, listen how it speaks to me...

Read the whole story at mcsweeneys.net