06/30/2011 07:21 pm ET | Updated Aug 30, 2011

Do You Want To Get Married This Year?

Before I got engaged, I had this strange notion that wedding madness was what you make of it. Bridezillas and astronomical wedding budgets were a product of spoiled women given free reign to execute their lifelong bridal dreams. I figured that a rational woman (me) planning a (normal) wedding event would be able to do it simply and at a low cost with little to none of the insanity that so often seems to crop up and fuel entire channels of television and film content. (Hello Wedding Channel!)

But the more I’ve interacted with the wedding industrial complex, the more I’m realizing that the strange things that weddings do to females are often rational reactions to the irrational choices they’re presented with. If you want to have a calm wedding planning process, you have to elope. Or spend tons of money to make someone else plan a wedding for you. And chances are you’ll still get to sample the absurdity of the wedding industry.

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