2date4love: Cancer Survivor Launches Dating Website For Those Who Can't Have Sex

For survivors of cancer and other diseases, sex can be a difficult and painful thing. But that doesn't lessen the human need for love and romance.

Enter 2date4love, a new website created by Laura Brashier, a 50-year-old cervical cancer survivor. The site launched at the beginning of this month.

The website is aimed toward people who cannot have sex, either due to disability, or caused by disease. For example, certain cancer treatments leave patients unable to have sex.

The idea for the website comes from Brashier's own personal frustrations. The 50-year-old hairstylist, who lives in Rancho Santa Margarita, Calif., underwent chemotherapy and radiation treatments after being diagnosed with stage 4 cervical cancer when she was 37. The radiation left scar tissue inside her vagina that makes it impossible for her to have sex without feeling pain, the Orange County Register reported.

Since then, Brashier said she had trouble dating men because she didn't want to broach the subject of sex -- and her inability to have it. And that's what inspired her to start the website, the Orange County Register reported.

From the website:

2date4love is a dating site that enables people who cannot engage in sexual intercourse to meet and experience love, companionship and intimacy at its deepest level. At 2date4love, we encourage people with this shared commonality to be open to the possibility of finding love and happiness. We are committed to finding your perfect match.

"Once you take sex out of it, people are still looking for companionship," Brashier told the Orange County Register. "It's about finding someone to share your sacred space with, to have someone in your life where it's you against the world."

Problems with intimacy after cancer are very common, gynecological oncologist Dr. Ilana Cass, of the Cedars-Sinai Samuel Oschin Comprehensive Cancer Institute in Los Angeles, told ABC News. With radiation in particular, thickening of the vagina is common, which can make it difficult for women to have sex.

In addition, some women experience premature menopause -- where they have hot flashes, stop having their periods and have a lowered sex drive -- while men may face erection problems, according to the National Cancer Institute.

Comments

[Jerusha Last Single Girl]

03:25 PM on 09/16/2011

Niche dating: par excellence! Love it! Yes, Virginia, there can be more to love than sex! So often singles feel no one will ever love them because they're too fat, too tall, have HIV/AIDS, are disabled, have children, are too old, the list of perceived dealbreakers is never ending. I love dating sites that champion all the many options and alternatives there are to be in relationship with another human being. Love on!

[Michal Appleton]

12:53 PM on 08/19/2011

I don't have cancer, never had, but who knows what life is perparing for us. Is this site ONLY for cancer patients who got better? Because that's NOTY what u advertise!
Am I wrong?

[Edward Wilkes]

02:00 AM on 08/17/2011

I am a cancer survivor. I am 51 and a woman from my childhood told me that she has had me in her heart since the very first kiss at age 15; I too was 15years old. I told her about my condition and she says...that she does not care and that she just wants to be with me again. Her love for me seems so' genuine, but I am afraid that when she finally leaves her husband of over 30years that she will begin to realize that I can only for the most part give her times of pleasure with the taste-bud detector within my mouth. When she is in my arms and in my presents so' many fondest of memories of our youth bring such warmth to an otherwise cold and lonely heart. I'm not sure if all will turn out for her to her satisfaction. I am no longer the young boy she remembers, "the boy of her youth."

[Halsey]

01:16 AM on 08/16/2011

IF it's free that would be true altrusism. "if" the fee is $30 give or take a month..well many cancer survivors (Me) are still paying off chemo and radiation. I still have that innate desire/need to spoon, hug and kiss a man I love. I discovered how vain I truly was after I ended up scarred and frankly quite bony from weight loss. So I WILL check out this site; again price is key AND ease in quitting (christianmingle made it very difficult!). I don't hate sex, but have zero drive. I used to almost carve notches in my sex belt. Now it seems so useless.
Love, hugs, yes.!!!
I hope the site checks out..Laura got quite lucky with the free advertising via this post. I pray the site lives up to my hope.
Peace.

[Danielle Marile]

04:55 PM on 08/15/2011

What a beautiful thing...

[mistyme310]

08:16 AM on 08/15/2011

I THINK THIS WEB SITE WILL BE A BIG HIT I SHOULD OF THOUGHT OF IT MY SELF.. AFTER MY HEART ATTACK I STOPED SMOKING GAIN WIEGHT AND HAVE BLATTER PROBLEMS SO IT WOULD BE NICE TO HAVE SOMEONE BUT NOT TO WORRY ABOUT SEX....

[Alfred Dato]

04:38 AM on 08/15/2011

Good to people take example from their real life and help community and society. A true effort..
www.jumpdates.com

[Blarg]

01:49 PM on 08/14/2011

Great idea. I do hope they put some emphasis on counseling even after people get together, as this sounds like rough waters, emotionally.

[onionboy]

12:56 PM on 08/14/2011

Dating without sex.

So, basically, it's meeting a partner and moving straight to marriage.

[BoudiccaBlanc]

10:56 AM on 08/14/2011

A good idea that helps people = Good News!

Kudos! :)

[froidytoidy]

10:55 AM on 08/14/2011

What a wonderful idea! Emotional intimacy is a wonderful experience to be shared between two special people. Survivors deserve it!

[lilspicey]

02:01 AM on 08/14/2011

I want to thank everyone who responded to my post. I have faith in humankind after the nice things that were said. I really feel this site will help so many people who have been hurt, who have illnesses they can't control. I have a wonderful husband who stays with me, and still tells me I am his world and he would be lost without me. I hope everyone out there who needs love and companionship can find the one they are looking for.

[thewirah]

12:24 AM on 08/14/2011

In my book, this initiative ranks much higher than those pseudo-"VIP" dating sites.

[Craig A Olson]

10:41 PM on 08/13/2011

Eat better, exercise more, dump your troubles on Jesus, move away from radio frequency transmission towers. This will lower your chance of getting cancers tremendously.

[Lona Tucker]

11:07 PM on 08/13/2011

Pray it away eh Craig ~ what a big help & great empathy you have ~ I don't think you'd know Jesus if you met him.

[John Roman]

10:26 AM on 08/14/2011

Or if you did, he would so NOT resemble the one the church has made him out to be, you'd run as fast as you could the other way yelling "liberal, socialist, hippie"......

[ThinkCreeps]

07:42 AM on 08/14/2011

#1 and #2 are good, but you're striking out after that.

[Craig A Olson]

01:16 PM on 08/14/2011

That's because they are over your head.

[natal plum]

09:41 PM on 08/13/2011

How about a site for people who don't have sex? Oh, never mind, dating sites. My bad