Writer Wednesday: What NOT To Do If You Get A Literary Agent

From Writer's Relief staff:

If you’re an aspiring writer, you’ve probably got an “I’d like to thank the academy” speech ready and waiting for those big career successes that you know are on their way. You already have plans for the first person you’re going to phone when you get “the call” that you’re about to be published.

We at Writer’s Relief think those things are important: If you find yourself rehearsing your victory speeches while you’re in line getting coffee, then you’re in the mind-set for success! Hooray for you! You’ve got the enthusiasm and optimism to make things happen. You’ve thrown open the windows and doors of your life so that success has no barrier if it wants to come in.

But because we’ve worked with so many writers over the years, we have seen a few newbies whose exuberant happiness caused them to botch what would otherwise have been a really big break. They let emotions get in the way of good sense.

So no matter how happy you are to have landed your literary agent, here are some things you should NOT do. Consider these tips now so that when you do get your agent, you’re prepared.

1. Getting an agent may give you the sense that all your old manuscripts—you know, the ones that got rejected a trillion times—are viable again. But don’t dig out all your dusty projects and mail them to your agent as soon as the ink on your contract dries. Agents generally work on one book per client at a time. Don’t overwhelm them! You can drop hints that you have other manuscripts, and if the agent is interested in seeing them, he or she will let you know. Otherwise, sit tight. One thing at a time.

2. Don’t treat your agent like your best friend. Don’t call to talk about your gout or your dog’s fleas. Be friendly and warm but also professional.

3. Every writer wants to believe he or she will be the next big thing. We all want foreign rights deals, movie deals, action figure contracts, great placement in bookstores, a fabulous multi-city book tour, etc. But again…one thing at a time. Your agent knows the best way to go about these things. So before you ask, “What about this, what about that?” too many times, make sure you’re not being annoying. You are your agent’s newest client—and you may be the lowest on the proverbial ladder.

4. The joy of getting an agent can deflate quickly once you get a request for revisions. Again, take care that you’re not ruled by emotions. If your agent asks you for revisions, be as professional as possible. The agent doesn’t want to hold your hand and take you through every line-by-line revision. He/she also doesn’t want to be ignored. If you don’t agree with your literary agent’s revision requests, take a moderate and thoughtful tone in the conversation and talk it out. Take the revision process very seriously; if your revisions don’t jive, you might lose your agent. We’ve seen it happen more than once. It stinks.

5. Let’s say your query was strong. Your book is strong. Your initial conversation with a literary agent made you appear knowledgeable and strong. And you landed your agent. Woo-hoo! Smooth sailing, right? Maybe not. We’ve seen strong writers who turn into quivering, needy crybabies the moment there is an agent in their corner. An agent’s job is not to be strong for you; it’s to be strong with you. Don’t think that having an agent is an excuse to quit standing on your own two feet.

6. Agents will expect you to ask them some educated questions before signing a literary agency contract. But they’ll also expect you to have done your homework and be very familiar with their work, client list and successes. They assume that because you sent your manuscript to them, you already know that they are a good fit—reputable, appropriate and trustworthy. If you start asking oddball questions that make an agent think that you doubt his/her integrity, the agent will begin to have a negative view of you. (And if you DO doubt the agent’s integrity, you probably shouldn’t have submitted to that person to begin with.)

Just because you have a literary agent on the hook doesn’t mean you’ve reeled one in! So play your hand carefully, even after you’ve signed your contract. If you land a great literary agent, do a happy dance, open champagne, call your mother and go out to celebrate!

Then, be professional, friendly and cool—like you knew it was only a matter of time before somebody saw how great you are. That’s why you’ve been rehearsing your acceptance speech, right?

QUESTION: If you were called to the stage to win a major writing award, what would say in your acceptance speech? Post it here!

To read more from Writer's Relief, click here!

Comments

[Peter Bowen]

10:56 PM on 08/25/2011

Just by pass the whole literary agent thing and publish an eBook. It's never been easier.

[Christmas Tree]

08:37 PM on 08/24/2011

I want to thank my publisher and agent for helping me bring my characters into your lives

[beattielasvegas]

07:37 PM on 08/24/2011

I accept this award with regard to all of the authors who write from the heart,my heart goes into all my works.Thank you with all the best to your future award winners.I am humble.

[garyd63]

05:26 PM on 08/24/2011

Let's say things don't go well with an agent and both parties, writer and agent, agree to a parting of the ways. Can anyone fill me in on the legal angles of this divorce? Are there any pitfalls, be carefuls, oh, oh's, to watch for? Is there still another legal contract needed and another legal expense to the writer to have this cleavage take place in a clean and final way, a manner which protects the writer's work as s/he plunges forward to the next step in finding an editor and a publisher? And, by the way (though I doubt this is anything that anything can be done about), what about all those copies of your manuscript that are now floating around in cyberspace? Any experience with problems over these copies being used, borrowed, stolen, barely revised? Oh, how naive. Of course, in the age of digitization everything is free to steal with nary a nod of concern.

[zingdaddy]

01:12 AM on 08/25/2011

I'm not an attorney, but you would be wise, preferably before signing any contracts, to hire a literary attorney to at least look over the contracts first. If you can't afford a literary attorney, try approaching one that works as a professor. If they can't help you, they may be able to direct you to someone who can. These are all pretty interesting people, so be nice.

Many states have organizations to help creatives like you at low to no cost. I used California Lawyers for the Arts when I was just starting out, and had a very good experience with them. I know they work with visual artists, not sure about writers. You can google them and find out, or just search for a similar organization in your state. Your results may vary.

Your attorney can answer the rest of your questions better than I. Hope this helps!

[garyd63]

11:58 AM on 08/25/2011

Thanks for this. I'll pass it along to my writer friend. Sad commentary on the state of the literary arts that (if I may generalize) agents who serve as the interface with corporate publishers have gone over to the dark side--commerce trumps art and you better get in line with your blockbuster wannabe or you're left in the cold.

[BlackJAC]

03:22 PM on 08/24/2011

Would it be acceptable to read out the people who smacked down your work before you made it big? 'Cause I had one writing professor who had some hard and fast opinions of where chapter breaks should go despite not having anything in print by the time I had her, and this one agent in Santa Fe who would said it didn't make sense to consider the other books I had on hand despite shooting down the book I offered her.

[zingdaddy]

01:01 AM on 08/25/2011

No. Watch "Bull Durham". When you are a top author, you can recount these stories for laughs at conferences, and people will think you're funny and colorful. Otherwise, such stories, told with anger and bitterness, make you look like someone to avoid, because a) they're neither fun nor interesting to listen to and b) people fear what you will say about them behind their backs,even if you're a top author, and especially if you aren't.

All writers get rejections. Every last one of them. You can't take these things personally. Have fun in this life, be fascinating, tell good stories, be a good listener. You'll be fine. You really will.

[BlackJAC]

09:10 AM on 08/25/2011

This wasn't mere rejection, it was outright snobbery on their part akin to that character in every single inspirational movie that tells the hero to stop pursuing the dream and accept their lousy lot in life. The professor had two books published in England, and they were already out of print by the time I had her; she last surfaced sometime last decade as being affiliated with a lit mag that failed. The agent simply could've sent a form rejection letter and left it at that.

[Kosmogonia]

02:27 PM on 08/24/2011

The first question I would ask my agent is if he or she is a manifestation of Agent Smith, and if it would be possible to gain admin rights.

[WriterlyWoman]

02:12 PM on 08/24/2011

My speech: Thanks to my husband for always supporting my efforts to be a writer even when nobody else believed. And thanks to my parents for encouraging me to read and read and read as a child. And thanks to everyone who ever sent me a rejection letter--you have made me push myself further than I thought I could go...and now...here I am!

Then, of course, followed up with, "and I am very pleased to accept this check for 100,000 dollars..."

:-)

[KHubbz]

02:11 PM on 08/24/2011

These tips make a lot of sense and they remind me of job interview protocol: Be enthusiastic about wanting the job yet remain calm and professional, have intelligent questions prepared but still show that you know about the company, etc. I guess the difficult difference is that you usually prepare for a job interview for a few weeks at the most, but you can query agents for years.