Steven Cross, Minnesota Man, Abandons Son Due To Money Woes

An 11-year-old Minnesota boy woke up last month to an empty house and a note from his dad saying that he could no longer provide for him, the Star Tribune reports.

Steven Cross, 60, of Lakeville, Minn. had raised his son, Sebastian, since he was a baby. But, once his financial woes started mounting, from a foreclosed home to five civil judgements totaling $35,000, the single parent decided to leave his son behind with just two curt notes on July 18, the newspaper reported.

The Star Tribune offered the text from one letter:

"You know your dad loves you more than anything...There are no jobs for architects so I have to go because the sherriff [sic] will take the house July 27th. There will be no more me...There are many great years ahead for you. No so for me."

According to the Pioneer Press, Sebastian's neighbor received a call from a woman claiming to be an ex-girlfriend of Cross. Allegedly, Cross sent her an email from a library in Carmel, Calif., admitting to leaving his son and that he was "depressed and sleeping in the streets."

FOX News reported that officials are still looking for Cross, who has been charged with gross misdemeanor of a child neglect.

Sebastian is currently living with a foster family until he can be placed with a relative.

Comments

[sixty-one]

08:42 PM on 09/01/2011

Carmel is one of the wealthiest places in Calif. And he's there using the library computer. It is not walking distance to a less expensive area and there is no public transit to anywhere cheaper. Carmel is a vacation destination and a damn fancy one, at that. Cry me a river...this man is a total loser to abandon his child and head for a resort area.

[Ask me Later]

01:05 PM on 09/01/2011

This is the reason why we need to keep the money in our country. I do not know how many people are out there willing to help those in other countries, but as I said before....The USA needs the help. I feel for this boy because like Lynscha9 said, he is going to go through a lot when he gets older. I do not think he will live this down. I do not think the father should have left him like that, but I do not believe that he should have made him go on the streets with him. He could have put him in a temp. child home until he got on his feet though. I pray for both of them.

[lynscha9]

01:52 AM on 09/01/2011

This is so tragic in so many ways but for the world to know that this man deserted his son and the son's name made public, is even worse. he has to live with the knowledge that he made front page news because his father left him. I pray for the boy!!

[Annette Hammond]

08:48 PM on 08/31/2011

I'm still waiting to hear an update on this story.Sad

[mebemommee06]

09:49 AM on 09/01/2011

same here. some people are being too judgement.. I was told I needed help because I stated that his mental state of mind played heavily on his actions. no one knows what goes on in ones mind when they are in total despair!

[Christine Houchens]

03:35 PM on 08/31/2011

I am torn with this story. The man was losing his home, he has no job and nowhere to live. Would it be better for him to have taken his son out on the streets with him? Or is it better to leave and allow the state to place the boy in a home?

I don't really think there is a right or wrong decision here. The father just didn't want to bring his son to the streets.

[Randi1968]

02:05 PM on 08/31/2011

What an awful thing to do to a little kid. I don't care HOW bad things get...the thing kids need most is the love and support of a PARENT. I don't care if the father was depressed, mental...whatever. There is no excuse for abandoning your child.

[Christine Houchens]

03:34 PM on 08/31/2011

The man is living on the streets, homeless. Is that better for the child?

[Annette Hammond]

08:52 PM on 08/31/2011

I'm really beginning to believe that some of these banks are truly cold hearted.

[Annette Hammond]

08:54 PM on 08/31/2011

At least the poor man did'nt murder his boy and then himself.Who knows,maybe the father is suicidal.The man loses his home and his child.

[libgrrl]

08:30 AM on 08/31/2011

Maybe in his mind he thought the child would get more help than he could provide with himself in the picture.

[bkisses]

06:37 AM on 08/31/2011

I would never leave my child, if i did leave my child with someone I would make sure i communicated with them until i found a job,.. I just cant see walking out of a childs life and not having some communication there.. This man took the easy road out, why not keep in touch and make sure your child is ok..

[see-ellen2001]

04:56 AM on 08/31/2011

You can't afford to support your child. But if you abandon your child, the state will pay another family to support him. Why not skip a step and give the money to the parent.

[PiedemontVA]

08:37 PM on 08/30/2011

Sorry, but people take care of their children under worse conditions every single day. There is no excuse to just walk away from a child because you are $35k in debt and get your home foreclosed on. Rent an apartment, get public assistance, whatever you need to do.

I guess I am saying this without knowing all of the details, but he had a car and had enough money to get all the way to California, so um, it couldn't have been that bad.

Poor kid is going through a lot, I bet.

[aqua0]

08:40 PM on 08/30/2011

How is this man supposed to get public assistance when food stamps and public housing are only for single mothers? Time to overhaul sexual discrimination in the government handouts, but it is up to men to do this, not women.

[PiedemontVA]

08:42 PM on 08/30/2011

Since when are food stamps or public assistance for women only? I am not an expert on the topic, but I just checked the MN website for food stamps and it says nothing about having a "girls only" rule, only income requirements.

[John Prewett]

08:24 PM on 08/30/2011

America could send notes to millions saying "sorry, no need for you anymore" ........

[AGooglyMinotaur]

06:45 PM on 08/30/2011

I just feel terrible about this whole situation. It's easy to blame the dad, but then I start thinking about how hopeless someone would have to feel to believe their child would be better off in foster care than have their real parent try to care for them. I'm sad to read this... I hope dad and son are okay.

[NY Grandma]

07:25 PM on 08/30/2011

Usually these stories end with the Dad murdering the child and himself. At least the boy has a chance.

[chrysostomos]

11:31 PM on 09/05/2011

Agreed.

[Hemkit]

05:48 PM on 08/30/2011

OK, how did the dad get from Minnesota to California? And he's homeless in Carmel?? Not likely. I think the townfolk would have him "move along," at minimum, to Monterey.

[Zenith1959]

05:30 PM on 08/30/2011

Not the best way to handle it, but what are you supposed to do when you simply cannot take care of a child anymore? I suppose you can get welfare and subsidized housing, but there are now time limits for that, but since the dad was 60, the five year(I think it is) welfare limit would have lasted until he started getting SS.

[Kelly12]

05:25 PM on 08/30/2011

Those of your criticizing the father: Yes, leaving his child alone in an empty house was an awful thing to do. But have you been unemployed, especially long term? I have. People treat you like you’re crud on their shoes. Friends abandon you. People who are supposed to be there to help scold you for “letting” yourself get into such a dire situation. Companies refuse to consider you for even menial jobs simply because you’re unemployed. Trolls on online message boards comment that if you’re unemployed, it’s only because you’re lazy and want to live off the hard work of others.

Now add in all the financial worries that come with being out of work. Live with all that for several months. Then tell me how your mental health is.

I hope someone finds this father and gets him the help he needs.