Transgender 10-Year-Old, Jackie, Born A Boy, Happier As A Girl

Turns out there are parents in the news who do the right thing. Jennifer and John of Ohio have a transgender 10-year-old child, and they support Jackie's decision to live life as a girl.

Since she was 18 months old, "it was always dancing, dress-up," says her mother Jennifer. Jackie loved the color pink and wearing ballerina outfits. She wanted sparkles and pretty shoes.

So when Jackie was about two years old, Jennifer started looking on the Internet, she tells "Good Morning America." That's when she first learned about transgender and started to wonder.

Jackie's sister, Sagan, was the first to ask if she really wanted to be a girl. "Yeah," she told her sister.

And when Jackie was just ten years old, she went to her mom, crying. "I'm a girl and I can't do this anymore," Jackie said. Without hesitation, Jennifer said, "It's gonna be okay." There was no judgment or disappointment.

Jackie's family abandoned the pronoun "he." At first, they only let her wear girls clothing at home, but eventually allowed her to live as a girl full-time, at school and elsewhere. When asked, Jackie's father John says he has two daughters.

But not everyone in the family has been as accepting as Jackie's parents. Her grandfather is resistant. "I cannot accept that a nine- or ten-year-old can make decisions for himself that will be life lasting," he tells GMA.

Although Jackie's parents worry about the future -- things like puberty and how Jackie might be treated later in life at work -- for now, they are focused on her happiness. When Jackie looks in the mirror, all she sees is "a girl that's a person," she says.

Jackie's story will be part of ABC's "Primetime Nightline's (Extra)Ordinary Family" special, airing tonight, Wednesday, Aug. 31 at 10 p.m./9c.

Comments

[awaa]

09:15 PM on 10/01/2011

As long as this child or any child is happy; Jackie certainly seems that way to me, why should it be such a big deal? A persons sex relates directly to their chromosome make-up. That's not my opinion but a medically proven fact.

Should the Jackie's of this world be treated like those who had a mental illness - lock them away out of sight out of mind? I'm sure some people still hold those views. I honestly don't understand why people simply can't accept some things are not black and white.

If some poeple spent less time knocking issues like this and dedicated their wasted energy and time into make the world a better place, I dare say everyone would be a lot happier.

[Kittyburger]

03:44 PM on 10/30/2011

That is, in fact, both your opinion and a false one. A person's sex is phenotypically determined, not karyotypically. A person's sex as assigned by birth is a combination of best-guess and in the case of infants with ambiguous genitalia, surgical intervention.

[kyoismyman backoff]

06:52 PM on 09/20/2011

the way i see it is that the idea of man and woman are conventional they're not rock solid truths. its kinda like way back in the day when people thought that mentally challenged hat the devil in them...see how horrible that sounds now. I have no problem with ppl not accepting gay lesbians and transgender but its another thing to talk against them and down them. I've come to love the word "transgender" i used to look at it with an ugly eye but its truly a beautiful word that allows one to be one. and i truly love this kid. I watched the tv special with my homophobic mother and she cried happy tears tho :)

[adelynmetze]

12:29 AM on 09/15/2011

I saw nothing in these parents that would indicate some sort of decision to change their son into a daughter. Who DOESN'T laugh at their child's birthday party? Whose kid doesn't have one toy they adore and another they put down and ignore? The mother was crying when she told the story of Jackie coming to her and telling her he was a girl and couldn't do that anymore. There was no mention of being "thrilled" that he/she'd made a "choice". The father obviously had wanted to do father son activites.

If we don't let our children BE people then how can we trust that they will grow up strong and ready for the world? Confidence comes from a love, acceptance and pride from caregivers.

As for the conundrum of stopping puberty or not stopping it, that's something completely out of my realm. If I were her parents I would be ambivalent. On one hand, would this make Jackie's teenage years easier to not have the confusion of male puberty? On the other hand, she's already become who she is and would puberty just be part of the natural process and would Jackie want to see what happens? Either way puberty isn't easy. And adults have changed genders surgically, so even if her male puberty was left to play itself out, she could still be a woman.

Jackie is lucky to have such loving and understanding parents.

[Bree Pho]

02:29 AM on 09/11/2011

babies at 18 mnths don't choose 'feminine' things or even know pink is a girl color...it's just a color. Why was the 18 mnth old dressed in a girl ballerina outfit for pictures in the first place? Many aspects of this story are disturbing to me...the video I saw when he opened birthday presents and got a GI Joe then put it down for the barbie you could hear parents and others laughing and giving obvious positive reinforcement to the decision. You have to wonder how much of that has been going on and for how long. Children want to please their parents. This could be a variation of Munchausen by Proxy for all we know...one or both parents maybe trying to get attention because of their child. I'm not saying it was necessarily a concerted conscious decision -but too many things about this story are 'off'. Who lets their 10 year old girl wear makeup like this? Why start him with the makeup so young? To my thinking it should be considered child abuse to give a boy hormones to thwart puberty based on decisions a 10 year thinks he wants to make about the rest of his life. Let the hormones play out then see how he feels when he's 18.

[kilthistle]

10:59 AM on 09/11/2011

"To my thinking....."

Luckily, we have SCIENCE, not just your "thinking," to help Jackie and her family make the best decisions for her possible treatment(s).

[MexDiva]

04:35 PM on 09/11/2011

You are implying that the parents didn't like to have a girl and boy (the most popular and ideal off-spring), so they deliberately decided to change their boy into a girl. They seem good parents to me. They feel for their son/daugther, for his/her future...why are you throwing all these mean implications on them?

[JonB2057]

10:31 PM on 09/10/2011

I sure am glad we did not have this "mass hypnosis" sending us down this road of confusion.

http://www.llewellyn.com/encyclopedia/term/Mass+Hypnosis

http://www.google.com/search?sourceid=opera-portal&q=mass+hypnosis&client=opera-portal&channel=portal#hl=en&client=opera-portal&hs=G6F&channel=portal&q=mass+hypnosis&tbs=dfn:1&tbo=u&sa=X&ei=xBxsToe5Lqr9sQKl95jkBA&sqi=2&ved=0CBYQkQ4&bav=
on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.&fp=8f5ffefd244fa52c&biw=1564&bih=708

[kilthistle]

11:04 AM on 09/11/2011

Really?

[Jim8]

01:33 PM on 09/10/2011

It's kind of obvious that there are a lot of shades of gray between black and white. It's going to be a tough life for this kid, but it would have been worse in the past.

And it might be easier in the future as we learn and accept.

[Regan DuCasse]

01:03 PM on 09/10/2011

I am very moved by Jackie's parents to UNDERSTAND and EDUCATE themselves about their child's gender identity and how to address it with love and compassion, rather than abuse and threats.
I've read horrible articles where fathers beat their small boys to death during boxing matches or some other roughness in order to keep them from being just like Jackie.
Jackie is healthy, VERY sweet and loving who child could grow up to make a contribution. What difference does GENDER make in that?
If the greater society sees Jackie as NOT having those most important qualities because she sees herself different from her outer gender, than it's society that is screwed up, and not Jackie or her family. Perhaps more conservative/traditional people TELL children all the time that a person's inner qualities that make them a loving and intelligent and responsible person are the most important.
Then turn around and are willing to teach children to be cruel and punish those who have a different outer APPEARANCE and gender qualities.
This the contradiction that confuses children. They are taught that morality is how much abusive control to have over the LGBT, rather than learning that morals are about how well you treat another human being justly and kindly.
Jackie is such a cute charmer of a kid. No reason for her not to be that as an adult.
Unless the community she's growing up in, hurts her to the point of damaging that most lovely of who she is.

[expeditor97]

09:42 PM on 09/09/2011

I see alot of support on here for this BOY...thats fine...just think about your posts when your son or daughter comes home and decides they want to be the opposite sex...and dont get mad when your son comes home with a boyfriend or your daughter comes home with a girlfriend

[KaraC]

02:40 PM on 09/10/2011

Why would you get mad? Is your love for your children conditional on their being heterosexual and being "gender aligned"? Or would you rather they feel free to confide in you whatever they are, and live happy and productive lives?

[expeditor97]

10:48 PM on 09/10/2011

actually i reread my post and it does sound kinda bad (mad) i just hate all the fake posters who say one thing to fit in and when confronted with this issue at home its a totally different story....i guess tone of voice doesnt translate well when you type...lol sorry

[Bobbie Jo Justice]

10:57 AM on 09/25/2011

it's not "deciding" someone wants to be a boy or a girl, and why should anyone get upset if their son dates another man, or their daughter dates another woman, or if their child is actually the gender opposite of what their physical body shows.

Gender is not based on what may or may not be between our legs, gender is based on what is in our minds at birth. The same is true for sexuality. .

I am a transgender female, and I was born this way from day one. Being GLBT is not a choice, we are simply being ourselves. For me, as well as for many other transgender people, it was a matter of transition or commit suicide instead of living with a lifetime of being in the wrong body.

I wish all people understood this. Being gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender is not a choice, it is a matter of simply being ourselves.

I'd like to see all families accept their straight, gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender children and love them unconditionally. We need to eliminate the hate in this country, we need to stop the bullying, the hatred, the name-calling, the harassment, and the murdering of glbt people in this country.

I would love to see churches take the lead in this and denounce as rubbish the old testament stuff about homosexuality, quit preaching hatred, and start preaching love and respect for all people.

[Djay0252]

12:20 PM on 09/09/2011

I do not believe a child of that age is capable of making such a decison. You don't think the parents used their biased influence?....naaa

[KaraC]

01:52 PM on 09/09/2011

It isn't a decision. It is about core identity. It may be that it is a "phase" for this child, but is likely not. Parents can't "influence" someone to be transgendered. You either are or you aren't, and certainly by ten years old you know. My first memory of knowing is from about 3 years old, and I grew up in a very traditional household wrt gender expression. I also knew that it would be a really bad idea to tell anyone, even at that age. Having supportive and informed parents will really help Jackie, whichever path she eventually follows.

[Desertmoon89011]

05:35 PM on 09/09/2011

I agree with both Djay and Kara, this has absolutely nothing at all to do with Jack's "decision" because the boy was conditioned into being a girl at a young, impressionable age (see parents' video for reference) and doesn't realize what went on, nor will he care anymore because.... well, he's happy as is, which is all the better for Jack(ie).

[expeditor97]

09:45 PM on 09/09/2011

so (just so im clear) you are a man but you grew breasts and wear a dress and now you think your a woman? Did you cut "it" off too?

[Bobbie Jo Justice]

11:00 AM on 09/25/2011

biased influence? do you mean like how some christians do to their children?

gender is in us at birth, and no amount of "influence" as you call it will change what we truly are inside, and here's another newsflash gender is NOT based on what is in between our legs, gender is what is in our minds and our hearts..

[Desertmoon89011]

02:34 PM on 09/08/2011

Too bad. If you took time to watch the parent's video, which obviously some of you didn't, you could see how obvious it is that the child is imitating the older sister in absolutely every single way here. A small child can eaily become confused, how about the parents do something about that instead of caving and going with what's easiest? I hope for the boy's recovery but I don't expect much good to come of this, it may be too late, hopefully puberty will push the foolishness out of Jack's system and he will go with what's correct here. Shame on the parents for "allowing" the conditioning their own video tape clearly shows us, shame on them.

[jmerose]

08:33 AM on 09/09/2011

Please explain how the parents "conditioning" (or acceptance, as I call it...) is any different from the conditioning and socialization of any society. When I was a kid, I was CONDITIONED (and kids today still are!) by McDonald's having a "boy" toy or a "girl" toy in the Happy Meal. I always asked WHAT is the toy? Why does it matter my gender? Why would my sex or gender dictate if I want to play with a doll or a truck or wear pink or blue? Come on, Desertmoon... It's all about what is accepted as "normal" in society because of the masses. (a.k.a. People who don't actually think for themselves...

[Desertmoon89011]

01:46 PM on 09/09/2011

Well, as far as this particular case, the parents produce a video where the child has clearly been conditioned into being something he is not. At that young age, the child cannot think for himself and so the parents have to do the thinking FOR him. As they obviously have, to Jack's detriment. So, he will naturally be comfortable as a girl, I'd expect this much but it was unfair to do to him nevertheless. If there was no sister influencing his likes or dislikes, as the parents video indicates, I could understand the gender identification issue but childhood video tells all. Jack is a boy, through and through, just misguided at a young age. I hope for his recovery.

[JonB2057]

09:50 PM on 09/10/2011

"Please explain how the parents "conditioning" (or acceptance, as I call it...) is any different from the conditioning and socialization of any society."

I believe the point that is being made (IMHO) is that this child is probably a strong reason to throw the "gay/homosexuals" argument of being "born" that way right out the window!

[Karissa36]

09:59 AM on 09/13/2011

I agree. Children will copy an older sibling in every way if the parents positively reinforce this. While some people may truly be transgender, it is difficult to say this child is in the face of such consistent early conditioning.

Hormones to prevent puberty? I can't believe any doctor would be so irresponsible. The parents are talking about chemical castration. What about height and muscle mass and all of the other things that come with puberty?

What is missing from this story is any reference to therapy for a child who by kindergarten was rejected by his peers.

[Hesseth Ran]

12:25 AM on 09/08/2011

I think the father said something very important - that when he was 2 years old, he knew he was a boy. That's a great acknowledgment that the child knows what gender she is, and that it's not about toy preferences, dress preferences, or even sexual preferences in a few years. The grandfather's assumption that the child, at 10, is too young to make this kind of decision is absurd; she had instinctively gravitated towards her mental gender at 18 months.

The important thing is that Jackie seems very happy as a girl and that her family is coming to terms with it. If hormone therapy doesn't present major risks in a few years, I see no reason why she should put up with going through male puberty, which I imagine would be traumatic. Her transition might be easier like this and the results could be better than trying to undo masculine traits later on. Not to mention that it would probably be easier from a psychological point of view if she went through adolescence and young adulthood as an actual woman, rather than putting up with an unwanted male body.

I know that if tomorrow I woke up in a male body, I would be devastated. Transgendered people have to suffer through that every day of their lives unless they have the money and support to correct it. Hopefully, things will be easier in the future for Jackie and others like her.

[jordanccc56]

05:50 PM on 09/03/2011

first, it's exceptionally close-minded to 'type' barbies, pink, glitter, and a general dislike of (what was it?) trucks etc as 'girl' and 'boy' accesories, respectively. in fact, it's thinking like that which makes it harder on girls and boys who enjoy a variety of playthings.
second, the irony of this interview is that these parents seem to adhere very strictly to gender sterotypes. did it cross their minds that when jackie showed a preference for dolls and dress up that he was imitating his older sister!? it really seems like they simply said, 'well, this one likes dolls, he's probably gay', which is really the epitome of close-mindedness.

[kilthistle]

09:07 PM on 09/03/2011

You started off so well! Your observation that kids should feel comfortable playing with all sorts of toys without gender implications, is spot on.

But, then, whoopsie!

"it really seems like they simply said, 'well, this one likes dolls, he's probably gay', which is really the epitome of close-mindedness."

Jackie told her family, I am a girl. Her core gender identity is that of a girl. That is much different and more serious than simply preferring to play with dolls. A person's core gender identity can not be changed by imitating an older sister, or by the mother, father, Lady Gaga or Marcus Bachmann.

"Gay," is a description of a person's sexual preference, totally different than core gender identity. There is nothing at all in this story about sexual preference.

Jackie was miserable as a boy, and she is happy as a girl. At the very least, doesn't that mean something?

[Poplivion]

04:22 PM on 09/04/2011

Reread what Jordon said, and watch the video again. Jackie's parents jumped to the assumption that Jackie was gay because she liked dolls and pink, not Jordon. The parents are already thinking about how they're going to "solve" Jackie's problem when she reaches puberty instead of letting her make those decisions when she gets there.

Jackie may opt for hormones and decide she likes being a girl with a penis. And what's the harm, she should have the freedom to be comfortable with what she has and how she sees herself. From what I saw, Jackie didn't seem to be too worried about her genitalia, and until it's a concern for her, it shouldn't be a concern for anyone else. I'm amazed at how many people are upset the parents aren't pushing her into mutilating her genitals and prepping her for some sort of surgery. We need to get out of the pre-op/post-op mentality and let people live the way they want to live.

[expeditor97]

09:48 PM on 09/09/2011

kilthistle...if you thought HE was miserable just wait till junior high and high school ...He hasnt seen misery yet

[kilthistle]

06:33 PM on 09/03/2011

Wickedness? Butchered? Really? This family is trying to do the best for their child. They are using scientific evidence and expert advice to make some really tough decisions about a kid who was handed a pretty big challenge.

I am having a hard time accepting the fact that the moderators are letting your vitriolic criticism stand.

[kilthistle]

10:05 PM on 09/03/2011

By the way, not just plain old ordinary wickedness, but, extreeeeme wickedness! I hope if the subject family ever reads this they are howling with laughter.

[jonathanu]

01:46 PM on 09/03/2011

The parents sound amazing... Good for them. And best of luck to Jackie!

[sb1285n]

10:57 AM on 09/03/2011

I applaud these parents for being so open minded about their daughter's choice.

What makes me angry is why can't a man wear a dress and put on make up? Why can't a woman cut her hair short and dress very masculine. Society puts these labels on you before you're even born and you're expected to fit them, no questions asked.

The problem is not that this 10 year old boy want to be a girl, the problem is that it could have ever been an issue in the first place.

[Kittyburger]

04:21 PM on 09/04/2011

This has nothing to do with the case at hand. This girl KNOWS who she is.