Arianna Huffington And Pat Mitchell Discuss Women And Power At The Paley Center For Media

"Women often have a harder time with the word ['power'] than men," Arianna Huffington said last night at New York City's Paley Center for Media, where Pat Mitchell, the Center's president and CEO, interviewed Arianna about her life and her personal path to success.

The conversation, part of the Center's She's Making Media series, touched on Arianna's early life and the role her incredible mother played in getting her to Cambridge to the early success of her book to her life as a writer, wife, mother, and most recently, the founder of the Huffington Post.

Discussing how ambitious women are perceived, Arianna quoted Marlo Thomas, who was a Paley Center She's Making Media honoree last spring, "If you are a man, to be called 'ruthless,' you have to be Joe McCarthy. If you are a woman, you just have to put somebody on hold."

For more of Arianna's thoughts on women and power, watch the clip above.

What do you think? How can we change the way driven women are viewed?

Comments

[Pam Hurley]

09:01 PM on 11/28/2011

I think when "power" is conceptualized and valued more as "power with" rather than "power over" women in leadership will be more respected. When power is experienced as heirarchical rather than as laterally distributed, it creates exploitation, resentment, and war. Women usually "lead" by putting relationships at the hub and by valuing cooperation, equity in relationships, work, and pay more than competition and financial disparity.

[ycr]

05:53 PM on 11/16/2011

Feminist women are ruthless. Especially to good looking powerful conservative women. Or women who claim they have been sexually harassed by liberal men. They are no where to be found.

[KRAZYHORZE]

03:37 PM on 11/15/2011

Being powerful (the way these ladies describe it) is a masculine trait; it is as repulsive to the senses as seeing a man act weak and effeminate.

[Kate Fletcher]

11:55 PM on 11/23/2011

Actually, macho, bossy guys are annoying and they grate on my nerves and give me a stomachache.

[Gritforlife]

04:29 PM on 11/14/2011

Us men, being used to power for so many centuries, have a difficult time letting go. Even more so, the majority of us have a difficult time of accepting the fact that women, when in power themselves, may not necessarily need men to take care of them.

This is hard for most men to understand, especially men from the baby boom generation.

However, the modern man must use the empowerment of women to his advantage. He must prove, through confidence, that he is not afraid of letting women completely take over, that he is not a bit intimidated by the fact that the woman's in charge and that he can still maintain his confidence, composure and directness in such situations.

I think that is proper advice for a man that has yet to master himself emotionally and has still to eliminate his power dependency over women.

[ystava]

08:53 AM on 11/15/2011

Yes... in my "centuries of power" at age 40 I have gotten too used to power through my psychic connection with all of those CEO's and leaders throughout the ages.

Point of fact.

Most men are not powerful. Most men are working for "the man" to some degree or another. Certainly most men are not so powerful that they command their own destiny.

The demographics of the powerful are entirely different than the demographics of society. This seems to be something lost on people talking about the inequality of power.

[Gritforlife]

09:30 AM on 11/15/2011

I think this is more evolutionary than societal. And when discussing power I referred to a man's' power over a woman, in particular in the household.

[ystava]

04:29 PM on 11/13/2011

I find that I detest anyone who focus on "power".

[Shirley Fisk]

12:51 PM on 11/13/2011

11/13/11
12:49pm
NYC

I am the expert on powerlessness.

[PerfumeisToxic]

03:09 AM on 11/13/2011

All you have to do is take notice of how men talk about powerful women (or more likely DON'T talk about) and this will tell you what you need to know about how they really feel about powerful women. They generally don't like it. They won't say so to your face but actions speak louder than some polite words to appease you. And you only have to look at the behaviour of women in TV and movies that men like to tell you what they really want. It's not strong opinionated women who have an independant happy life and are not dependant on them.

[ystava]

04:55 PM on 11/13/2011

Or maybe your view is skewed because you don't sound like someone I would share any real thoughts with... probably I would treat you the same as any obnoxious male.

[carolny]

12:17 AM on 11/12/2011

Some time ago, I read an article online about men stating what they want, and not being "polite" or apologetic about asking for what they want. I have begun to apply that behavior to the way I communicate with women and men: "I want…" "and I want it by…" I'm direct, and I don't hem and haw about what it is I want and need. I am a woman of color who is a PhD candidate at a well-known university in New York city. I am dating a man of color who received his Phd degree this past May. He shared with me the title of his dissertation, before its final submission was due, and I pointed out to him some grammatical and comprehension errors I saw with his title. Instead of letting me know that he appreciated my editorial comments, he said nothing: no "Thank you," "Thanks for looking out for me," nothing. When I spoke to him about it after his graduation, he dismissed my comments and was aloof with his thoughts on the matter. It doesn't matter that a woman may be on par with a man academically, or have a dominate position of authority in the workplace, he will always few her in a subordinate position. As the saying goes, "The power is in the p." Period.

[PerfumeisToxic]

02:32 AM on 11/13/2011

Exactly. Women are incredibly naive about how most men really think. They do not want a woman as a friend. They want a woman as a subordinate to make themselves feel more powerful. Womens wishful thinking about her "best friend relationship" stops her seeing the obvious truth. This attitude is common to most men about most women. Men do not want woman to be equal. Even your beloved man probably thinks like this and just keeps it to himself to stay on your good side. Look at how often men admire powerful women and you will get a clue about what they really think..

[ystava]

04:33 PM on 11/13/2011

I think you're statement that most women are naive about what most men think... but not for the reasons you seem to think.

[carolny]

05:36 PM on 11/13/2011

"Men do not want woman to be equal. Even your beloved man probably thinks like this and just keeps it to himself to stay on your good side."

I agree wholeheartedly with your sentiment. The gentleman I spoke of in my original post has asked me, numerous times, if I want to get married again, and has even proposed. I hope he doesn't think that if I were to marry him that he would gain "power" and control over me once we were married, and that I will become his silent accoutrement. I won't. In a perfect world, a marriage is two people being equals, and submissive, to each other. I don't need to be married for my life to be complete, and I am okay with being with a man when [I] want to be with him, not because I have to be with him! That's power.

[ystava]

04:39 PM on 11/13/2011

I like the first half of the story. I am a male... I have a PhD... and I will say that my universal concern in dealing with any person in a professional environment is that there not be static or extraneous BS. I appreciate people who cut to the chase and work on getting things done. But beyond just stating what you want, there is also the understanding that you may not get what you want when you want. And for what it's worth, I had to learn the same thing; a full appreciation of this wasn't innate.

If I were to follow Perfumeis Toxics logic --- most men are very naive about what women really think... and how women constantly want to bring in ancillary BS that has almost nothing to do with accomplishing a task.

Your boyfriend sounds like a jerk.

[halifaxfinance]

05:12 PM on 11/11/2011

It is harder when you're a woman in business. Many female business owners tell me everyone always assumes they are not the owners of the business. In fact, there are global issues, women have a harder time to access financing to open or grow a business.
There is a movement of women as entrepreneurs, trailblazers like Arianna and we need more. Arianna provides wise advice through her posts for women entrepreneurs as one that has made it, and been through it. Thanks for this wise advice! Lana

[Lady Saera]

01:51 PM on 11/11/2011

Beautiful insightful article, Arianna is right about things attributed to men as opposed to women.
I enjoyed this article, and I admire her greatly. It's wonderful to see women support each other rather than jealously denigrate each other.

[CarmanK]

09:48 AM on 11/11/2011

Now this is a good article about the possibilities that women have to advance themselves as human beings in the home and workplace. It also, lets women know that they are worthy of their EQUAL status in the US society which is guaranteed them by the US constitution. The MS personhood amendment should be a wake up call to all women across this country. Our equal rights are under attack by "blind ideologues" who would dictate a woman's life choices from puberty to menses. All women must understand, we have an obligation to stop the assault on our humanity and take a stand against the injustices such extreme ideologies could impose on the unknowing. There is no basis in science that a EGG is a person, any more than there is a certainty that an "immortal soul" is infused in an EGG at fertilization. An EGG is not a fish, An EGG is not a chicken, an EGG is not a person.

[KaleighGMcLaury]

09:28 AM on 11/11/2011

Great comments on the perceptions of successful women verses successful men by Arianna Huffington. Though women take 50% of the spots in law school, medical school, and business schools, they still have to do exactly as Arianna vocalizes they "just put someone on hold." Why? Because they still have to spin 10 plates with multiple roles of wife, mom, homemaker, entertainer, social calendar organizer, as well as accomplishing their present goals. It is good to have good women role models as this role of "success" as a woman often comes at a high price. Often others perceive this woman to be "aloof" or "cool" when she is simply "very, very busy," Successful women long as much as the next person to be loved and prized in all of her significant relationships.

[ljblinddog]

11:23 PM on 11/10/2011

Men are afraid of themselves, so fear others andbthat includes women. To the degree that a man is comfortable with himself, is how comfortable with others, including women. It's amazing how much power weak and fearful require.

[theaustralian]

12:27 AM on 11/11/2011

Why are men afraid of women? i can tell you most men i know aren't affraid of women at all.

[ljblinddog]

11:08 AM on 11/11/2011

Tell me how you know.

[jkkFL]

10:19 PM on 11/10/2011

Then there's this:
@ariannahuff
Arianna Huffington
.@RonSuskind Thanks for stopping by our newsroom. I hope you found it less dysfunctional than the White House.
1 hour ago via web Favorite Retweet Reply

[enlightenedgirl]

09:44 PM on 11/10/2011

Women and Power?  Well I think we need to take a hard look to what's happening with the Cain Campaign first before we start patting each other on the back for our Successes.  For these Women to be called every name in the Book just because they had enough guts to Report Sexual Harassment, just look at the Backlash.

All 5 of these Women are being trashed and we All need to stand up and say "Enough"!

[theaustralian]

12:29 AM on 11/11/2011

well monica was also attacked, this happens when women are involved in political scandal, things turn sexist.

[WilliamL]

06:31 AM on 11/11/2011

Monica was not attacked.

She willfully participated.