You're not a piece of meat -- but you can still be a "bacon lover."
The pork-o-philes at J & D's Foods say they're cooking up their first genuine batch of Baconlube. For just $11.99 plus shipping, you can lather up in their smokey, salty, and delicious lubricant-massage oil.
Of course, such an outrageous offering should be taken with a grain of J & D's signature bacon salt. In April 2009, the company introduced the same product -- also known as the "McRib of Sex" -- as an April Fools Day joke.
"But when the joke ended, the emails kept coming," J & D's website explains. "People harassed us via email, in public and in highly inappropriate ways (thanks for that). The waiting list grew to over 3,000 people. Expectations were built."
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The news is particularly exciting for Canadian bacon lovers, who will no longer be forced to choose between their two favorite past times.
"So you’re welcome Canada, you’re welcome — we’ve got your back,” a press release obtained by the Toronto Star said.
Founders Justin and Dave established Seattle-based, bacon-obsessed company in 2007. Other offerings include Bacon Ranch, Bacon, Bacon Pop, Bacon Lip Balm, and bacon flavored Mmmvelopes.
WATCH: The original Baconlube joke video: