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Pet Custody Cases Increasing, Divorce Lawyers Say

By SUE MANNING   02/28/12 02:22 PM ET  AP

LOS ANGELES -- They still fight like cats and dogs in divorce court. But more and more they are fighting about cats and dogs.

Custody cases involving pets are on the rise across the country.

In a 2006 survey by the 1,600-member American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers, a quarter of respondents said pet custody cases had increased noticeably since 2001. The academy is due for another survey, but there is no doubt such cases have grown steadily since then, said Ken Altshuler of Portland, Maine, a divorce attorney and AAML president.

If there is a child involved in a divorce, many judges will keep the pet with the child, attorneys said.

"But what do you do when the pet is the child?" Altshuler asked.

Breakups in same-sex marriages, civil unions and domestic partnerships are among reasons pet custody fights have become more common, attorneys said.

Pet custody cases have grown as much as 15 percent in his office over the last five years, said attorney David Pisarra of Santa Monica.

He is his own best example. He shares custody of 8-year-old Dudley, a longhaired standard black-and-tan dachshund, with his ex, who has remarried and introduced a step-dog to Dudley.

Pet consultant Steven May hired Pisarra six years ago to handle his divorce. Besides a daughter, May and his ex worked out custody of three dogs, two cats and Tequila the parrot.

Pisarra and May became good friends and often take their dogs for walks in Santa Monica. They also teamed up last year to write a book about co-parenting a pet with an ex titled "What About Wally?"

Pets are considered property in every state in the country. For years, they have been divvied up like furniture during divorce proceedings. But times are changing.

"Judges are viewing them more akin to children than dining room sets. They are recognizing that people have an emotional attachment to their animals," Altshuler said.

"There is a shifting consciousness," Pisarra said. "Pets are being given greater consideration under the law."

More people have pets than ever before and they consider them part of the family rather than possessions, said Silvana Raso, a family law attorney with the Englewood Cliffs, N.J., law firm of Schepisi & McLaughlin.

"People are not embarrassed to fight for custody of a pet today. In the past they might have shied away from it because society didn't really accept a pet as anything other than an accessory to your life," she said.

When Pisarra and Jay Redd (who wrote an introduction in the book) split up, they agreed to share Dudley.

"There is no law that recognizes visitation with an animal," Raso said, so couples have to work it out themselves.

Reaching a pet custody agreement without a lot of help from attorneys and judges will save money, Raso said. Divorces can cost $1,000 and be resolved quickly or cost millions and take years.

Pet decisions are often more agonizing to make than those about mortgages, credit card debt or student loans, Raso said. But if they can be resolved, the rest usually goes smoother.

After their 2006 breakup, Pisarra and Redd worked out shared custody, long-distance visitation and a new family (including a beagle) in Dudley's life, Pisarra said. Today, they live in the same city, so visitation no longer includes flight time.

The two have a plan for everyday, vacation and holiday schedules, travel arrangements, doggie daycare, boarding, food, treats, grooming, vet care, moving and end-of-life decisions. They split costs and sometimes, with things like toys, leashes and dog bowls, they buy two of each so Dudley has one at each home.

May and his wife Nina (who also wrote an introduction for the book) separated six years ago after 16 years of marriage. "Everything was fresh and raw. It was not easy."

It's taken time, but he and his ex live about two miles apart in West Los Angeles now and sharing custody of their daughter and pets is easy, he said. To make it work, "you learn the true meaning of concession," May said.

The three dogs the couple had then have died, but Winnie, his 3-year-old Cavalier King Charles spaniel, is very much like a family pet, said May, a consultant to veterinary and other pet-related companies.

Most of the time, custody battles grow out of love. But there are cases rooted in spite or retaliation.

Pisarra represented a man whose estranged wife had the family's two German shepherds euthanized. "They were his running dogs. It was really cruel and he had no recourse," he said.

In years past, pets could not be protected in domestic violence restraining orders in any state. But because abusers can use pets to threaten victims, maybe even kill the animals, the laws have changed in states like Maine, New York, California and Illinois. Other states are looking into changes. And there will be changes in other laws too, Altshuler predicted.

He believes there will one day be statutes for pets, much like there are for children, giving judges guidelines to rule by.

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LOS ANGELES -- They still fight like cats and dogs in divorce court. But more and more they are fighting about cats and dogs. Custody cases involving pets are on the rise across the country.
LOS ANGELES -- They still fight like cats and dogs in divorce court. But more and more they are fighting about cats and dogs. Custody cases involving pets are on the rise across the country.
Filed by Ashley Reich  | 
 
 
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This user has chosen to opt out of the Badges program
03:36 PM on 03/14/2012
Hello? Anybody home? Its a divorce...its about 'winning'. Its not about 'resolving'
02:44 PM on 03/02/2012
It is sad that pets can get caught in the middle of these divorces although it is also nice to know that more people are treating their pets like family. -Igor Purlantov
08:44 PM on 03/01/2012
Makes sense. The dog is the loyal one in the relationship.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
DSevere
Deviant mind
06:12 PM on 03/01/2012
I understand this, my dogs are my kids and I'd never give them up under any circumstances. And I'm glad my ex-husband let me have my first dog, because that would have been a nasty fight.

That said, I hope people who have a reasonably amicable breakup can come to terms with this. The dog will always be a little more bonded to one person in a couple (you can tell by, when one of you leaves the room does the dog stay, or follow the one leaving? and other small indicators like that.)

The dog should go with the human they're most bonded to.

And the other human should go and rescue another dog to keep them company, dog lovers should always have a pup.
04:57 PM on 03/01/2012
Considering the lifespan of a dog, I don't think it's worth fighting over.
11:04 AM on 03/01/2012
I'm happy to hear the "system" is recognizing the emotional impact our pets have on our lives and that their best interests would be considered in deciding custody. However, I'd like to think that two adult humans can make that decision without lawyers & mediation. I can't imagine denying my husband and stepson time with our furry family members should God forbid we split up. Always amazed at what insanity & irrationality arises during diivorces...so sad for the kids and pets stuck amidst the fray.
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ethelmertzrules
Repetition doesn't make it true
10:35 AM on 03/03/2012
We all know there is a paucity of adult humans in a divorce.
09:02 AM on 03/01/2012
Thank you for the great comments!

If you want to know more, go to www.WhatAboutWally.com where you can learn more about the authors, and buy the book on Amazon or BarnesandNoble.com.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Helena Williamstom
07:46 PM on 02/29/2012
Only a dog lover can relate to my following statement: I love my dogs as if they were my children.

However with that said, I would take a long look and decide which of us the dogs were closer to; easier than hiring an attorney.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
savantpm
06:47 PM on 02/29/2012
Dogs are definitely more loyal than some men!
09:03 PM on 02/29/2012
you could have easily said dogs are definitely more loyal than some women as well. they don't call dogs man's best friend for nothing you know.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
redwingirish
06:44 PM on 02/29/2012
DAMN, she's already getting all my money, she want's the dog too!
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lovetogutyou
I hide behind my eyes
06:26 PM on 02/29/2012
Would NEVER give up the pup. NEVER.
10:56 AM on 03/01/2012
no wonder, hes way to cute!
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lovetogutyou
I hide behind my eyes
02:56 PM on 03/02/2012
Hehehe, thanks! He's my hero. Everyone thinks I rescued a dog but he really rescued me.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
bcmom
Stop breeding puppies
12:46 PM on 02/29/2012
Grow up. There are millions of dogs in shelters looking for homes before they are euthanized. How about we grow up?
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Joanne Naiman
11:03 AM on 02/29/2012
Our dogs and cats are members of the family. A judge shouldn’t be the one to decide who gets custody of your beloved poodle. Nor do you and your spouse want $500-an-hour lawyers to argue over your tabby. In mediation a couple can come to terms over the important decisions that must be made about their pet. That's why we detail, Why Divorce Mediation Matters to Man's Best Friend: www.nycdivorcemediator.com/blog
12:31 AM on 02/29/2012
My ex threatened to fight me on the dog, but he didn't respond to my petition for divorce so I got the dog.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Willow712
democratic socialst
11:08 PM on 02/28/2012
When I divorced, I had brought my chocolate lab with me. The ex didn't like the dog at all, but I knew he wanted to control everything he could. So in my divorce papers, the dog is named as mine, by description, rabies tag number and picture. And he did try to control the dog. But my attorney started pushing the ex, and he backed down and signed the papers. The attorney said that there are a lot of pet custody problems.