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Arlen Specter's Memoir: The Five Steamiest Passages

Posted: 03/23/2012 3:03 pm Updated: 03/23/2012 6:16 pm

Arlen Specter

WASHINGTON -- Arlen Specter, the former senator who served Pennsylvania for 30 years, is out with a new memoir that laments the loss of comity in the U.S. Senate, calls for televised oral arguments at the U.S. Supreme Court and airs his grievances against Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-Nev.) for taking away his seniority when he switched parties and became a Democrat.

But at certain points, the book gets more titillating, with Specter pulling the towel off to reveal what goes on behind-the-scenes in the Senate gym and massage room, as well as how he felt when he first met former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin.

"Off the floor, the conversation is really different," he told The Huffington Post. He pointed to the 2005 debate over President George W. Bush's judicial nominees and the use of the filibuster as an example of when lawmakers vote the party line instead of their consciences, leading to a deterioration in the quality of government.

"If people would express their honest opinions, it would be a very different place and a very different government," he said.

Here are some highlights from Specter's memoir, "Life Among the Cannibals," detailing what happens off the Senate floor. The book will be released on March 27:

Ted Kennedy In The Hot Tub: "I was in the whirlpool at the Senate gym in 2008, recovering from Hodgkin's, when Ted Kennedy came over and climbed into the bath. Kennedy was one of the Senate's giants, in many ways. It was as though a gigantic walrus had plunged into the sea, causing the level to swell. I'd never seen two men in the whirlpool before, but the tub was big enough for two or more. There was a sign that you had to shower before entering. I hadn't checked that out with Kennedy, but I had neither an objection nor compunction about his coming into the bath. We chatted." (p. 40)

Decline Of Senate Camaraderie: "Sometimes courtesy and camaraderie waned, even in the gym. Once, during lengthy waits for massages while we used a temporary gym in the Dirksen Building, I was walking undressed to the last table. Another senator, also naked, walked briskly, perhaps at a slight run, and slipped in ahead of me. That was something that senators just don't do." (p. 68)

Dale Bumpers' Joke: "[Former Sen. Dale] Bumpers could keep you in the steam room with his storytelling and southern humor. One of his most raucous tales was about a traveling salesman tooling along an Arkansas dirt road in a convertible with the top down when a giant wasp landed right where you can imagine, with a long penetrating stinger, causing the area to swell instantly and enormously.

Trying to relieve the pressure, the man loosened his pants and drove as fast as he could to the nearest town. Unable to find a doctor, he went to a drugstore. Behind the counter was an elderly woman. Holding this protuberance in both hands, enormously swollen, he said in a plaintive tone, 'What will you give me for this?'

The woman looked at it and said, 'I'll have to consult with my twin sister, who's in the back.' They came out, and after a short huddle one said to the man, 'Would $1,000 and a half interest in the drugstore be sufficient?'" (pp. 68-69)

Meeting Sarah Palin: "Still, she [Palin] was a total charmer, very friendly. The few things she said were intelligent. We were sitting virtually knee to knee in the cramped bus, and she radiated sensuality. Her skirt rode above her knees -- not exactly short, but close." (p. 156)

Working Out With John Thune: "[Sen.] John Thune, who looked like a movie star in or out of clothes, was constantly stretching. His lanky body seemed to have some kinks to iron out." (p. 226)

Thune's office did not respond to a request for comment on that passage.

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WASHINGTON -- Arlen Specter, the former senator who served Pennsylvania for 30 years, is out with a new memoir that laments the loss of comity in the U.S. Senate, calls for televised oral arguments at...
WASHINGTON -- Arlen Specter, the former senator who served Pennsylvania for 30 years, is out with a new memoir that laments the loss of comity in the U.S. Senate, calls for televised oral arguments at...
 
 
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02:03 PM on 12/03/2012
Leads one to wonder- how many closeted gay men are in our government. Arlen is obviously gay to even write about this stuff. Who the heck cares about the gym and steam room?
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
OCCUPYHERALD
Live, Love, Laugh,share, grow.
10:37 AM on 08/28/2012
RIP.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
OCCUPYHERALD
Live, Love, Laugh,share, grow.
10:36 AM on 08/28/2012
Everyone will be telling that waspe story Now!
02:11 PM on 03/31/2012
Arlen Specter, Bring Sexy Back
03:09 PM on 03/28/2012
I always thought Arlen Specter was creepy. His preoccupation with other people's bodies only confirms my suspicions
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
OCCUPYHERALD
Live, Love, Laugh,share, grow.
10:36 AM on 08/28/2012
really missed the whole point
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hopingheart
We can succeed only if we find a way together...
02:23 PM on 03/28/2012
Look, People -- if we try to provide health care to everyone or feed our children decently, these poor Senators might not be able to get their free massages and haircuts and meals and their own extraordinary healthcare.

Have a heart!
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Pantsy
11:50 AM on 03/28/2012
ok, that got a little weird and creepy at the end.

who is paying for that fancy gym, steam room, whirlpool and massages? man, if i'd have known those were perks of the job...on second though, nah, those arent worth having to spend all my time with them.
11:31 AM on 03/28/2012
How is ANY of this remotely 'steamy?' And including Dale Bumpers' joke as 'steamy?' Ah, Ms. Terkel, you appear so young...
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AG creative
Ba Gawk!
10:05 AM on 03/28/2012
Arlen is a perverted old bird, eee?
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badgerwoman
We'll always have Paris
10:02 AM on 03/28/2012
The Palin anecdote is kinda sad. A forty-something woman, governor of a state no less, still relying on shorty skirts and her legs to sell herself. Well, since then we've ALL found out why she resorts to this, haven't we?
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Michaela19801
Dante's Inferno aka GOP
09:58 AM on 03/28/2012
Poor things. They have to wait for a massage.

Give me a break ! Do they spoon feed them too ?
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Michaela19801
Dante's Inferno aka GOP
09:56 AM on 03/28/2012
Wow if that is the steamy part then the book is a snooze.
10:02 PM on 03/27/2012
I look forward to reading this book. He had a nice career in the Senate. He was elected in the '80 Reagan election. Imagine this Senator complaining about partisanship. There was a day when I was a doorman for the Senate when I saw the late Phil Hart, Hubert Humphrey, and Barry Goldwater walking down the hall talking and laughing together.

Senator, I rarely agreed with you but have always thought you had a spine and core beliefs. We need more of that in the Senate. May remain in good health and live a long life.
08:28 AM on 03/27/2012
"Still, she [Palin] was a total charmer, very friendly. The few things she said were intelligent."

So, we know this is fiction.

"We were sitting virtually knee to knee in the cramped bus, and she radiated sensuality. Her skirt rode above her knees -- not exactly short, but close."

"So I said: 'Mrs Palin, are you trying to seduce me?' "
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lostnacfgop
Tiny Ripples of Hope from a Blue State's Red spot
09:29 AM on 03/28/2012
To which Palin replied, "What does 'seduce' mean?"
10:18 AM on 03/28/2012
"Aren't you?", said the Spector.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-3lKbMBab18
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Elliot Stamler
11:02 PM on 03/25/2012
I always admired Arlen Specter but I think the reason he is no longer a senator is that against good advice from Joe Biden and many, many others, he remained in the GOP until the election year. His departure was regarded as purely opportunistic. It was opportunistic but it was also ideological..he should have open his eyes, smelled the coffee, and gotten out of the Republican Party, which loathed him, years earlier. Timing is everything..in politics as in life.