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Michael Stolar, Guy Who Sent Dating Survey, Speaks Out

The Huffington Post  |  By Posted: Updated: 05/21/2012 5:27 pm

Dating Survey Guy Speaks Out

It started much like any other finance industry dating story gone viral. A girl forwards some sort of absurd communication -- a 1,600 word e-mail after one date, a post-date evaluation survey, or an Excel spreadsheet -- from a finance guy she went out with and the Internet commences mocking the self-aggrandizement that's become emblematic of Wall Street types.

Except, this time, the "finance guy" in question -- who was dubbed "creepy" by Deadspin for sending a survey to a woman he went on four dates with -- isn't waiting for his 15 minutes of Internet fame to pass while hoping no one learns his real identity.

No, Michael Stolar has gone public with both his name, and his side of the story in a lengthy post on the Atlantic Wire. The post includes a screen grab of the original e-mail Stolar sent to his date as evidence that the whole survey thing was tongue-in-cheek.

"As you can see it is dripping in sarcasm and I had to apologize in it for fear of coming off as patronizing," Stolar told the Atlantic Wire, adding that after it appeared on Deadspin, subsequent iterations of the story moved further from the truth.

"As the story grew I got a promotion each time it was picked up by a new outlet," Stolar wrote. "It peaked with TIME Business comparing me to Gordon Gecko and the guy from American Psycho. Unreal, right? Considering I don't work in equity finance."

To be fair, Amy Tennery, the author of the post that appeared on TIME's website, did ask the question of whether banker types are judged more harshly than other men as a result of all the anger that gets directed at Wall Street.

"Men in other quote-un-quote prestige fields rarely suffer the same stigma" she writes. "'Creepy doctor' dates? That’s not really a 'thing.' Sure, they happen — but rarely is the phrase 'that's what you get for going out with a doctor!' uttered when someone recounts a terrible date with an MD," she wrote.

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