Former GOP senator and renowned champion of austerity Alan Simpson has turned to a popular erectile dysfunction pill to craft his latest metaphor on the need for Congress to address the nation's growing debt.

In an interview with the Daily Beast, Simpson said he's waiting for Capitol Hill to be hit by the so-called “Cialis solution,” a term he credits to his debt commission co-pilot, former Clinton chief of staff Erskine Bowles.

“When it’s ready, it’ll be ready,” he told the Daily Beast.

And Congress will have little choice but to act, Simpson predicted. If they don't do something before the end of 2012, the Bush tax cuts will expire across the board and spending cut triggers will be enforced, a pair of actions that the CBO has warned could send the nation off a "fiscal cliff."

In classic fashion, Simpson then went on to say that lawmakers would have to get their hands dirty with cuts to entitlement programs.

“If someone says, we can get you out of this box without touching precious Medicare, precious Medicaid, precious Social Security, or precious defense, someone ought to just say, ‘You’re a fake. You’re a phony,’” Simpson claimed.

Simpson has frequently employed strange and at times vulgar metaphors throughout the course of his latest career move as an adviser on debt and deficit solutions.

One of his most popular targets has been Social Security, or as he's called it, a "milk cow with 310 million tits." In a recent profanity-laced letter to a "wretched group of seniors" who had taken issue with his plan to enact Social Security cuts and raise the retirement age, Simpson accused the "greedy geezers" of "shoveling bullshit" about the fiscal health of the program.

This week, Simpson wrote an angry letter to The Huffington Post responding to a blog post that had taken issue with his language in that letter. In it, he accused the authors of feeding people "bullshit and mush" about the future of Social Security.

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  • 'Cow With 310 Million Tits'

    "I've made some plenty smart cracks about people on Social Security who milk it to the last degree. You know 'em too ... We've reached a point now where it's like a milk cow with 310 million tits!" -- Simpson on Social Security <strong>Source: <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/08/24/alan_simpson_social_security_n_693277.html" target="_hplink">The Huffington Post</a></strong>

  • 'Blood Sweat And Eyeballs'

    "A lot of blood, hair and eyeballs have to lay on the floor before we finish." -- Simpson on fixing the budget deficit <strong>Source: <a href="http://www.cnbc.com/id/15840232/?video=1421510966&play=1" target="_hplink">CNBC</a></strong>

  • 'Snoopy Snoopy Poop Dogg'

    "This is a fakery. If they care at all about their children or grandchildren, and sometimes I doubt that -- I think, you know, grandchildren now don't write a thank-you for the Christmas presents, they're walking on their pants with the cap on backwards listening to the enema man and Snoopy Snoopy Poop Dogg, and they don't like them!" -- Simpson on young people and their grandparents <strong>Source: <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/03/07/alan-simpson-snoopy-poop-dogg_n_832626.html" target="_hplink">The Huffington Post</a></strong>

  • 'The Lesser People'

    "We're trying to take care of the lesser people in society." -- Simpson on Social Security <strong>Source: <a href="http://www.ustream.tv/recorded/7698698" target="_hplink">Ustream</a></strong>

  • 'Just Let Them Sink'

    "We have the ability, and I hope the trust of each other, to adjust and put together a package. And if the American people and the Congress don't like it, then just let them sink." -- Simpson on the budget deficit <strong>Source: <a href="http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,591463,00.html" target="_hplink">Fox News</a></strong>

  • 'Picking With The Chickens'

    "You'll be picking with the chickens yourself when you're 65." -- Simpson on Social Security <strong>Source: <a href="http://www.ustream.tv/recorded/7698698" target="_hplink">Ustream</a></strong>

  • "When I Make A Mistake 'It's A Doozy'"

    "Over the last 40 years, I have had my size 15 feet in my mouth a time or two. To quote my old friend and colleague, Senator Lloyd Bentsen, when I make a mistake, 'It's a doozy!'" -- Simpson on Social Security <strong>Source: <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/08/24/alan_simpson_social_security_n_693277.html" target="_hplink">The Huffington Post</a></strong>

  • 'Sparrow Belch'

    "We're going to get rid of all earmarks, all waste, fraud and abuse, all foreign aid, Air Force One, all congressional pensions. That's just sparrow belch in the midst of the typhoon. That's about 6, 8, 10 percent of where we are. So, I'm waiting for the politician to get up and say, there's only one way to do this: you dig into the big four, Medicare, Medicaid, Social Security, and defense. And anybody giving you anything different than that, you want to walk out the door, stick your finger down your throat, and give them the green weenie." -- Simpson on Social Security <strong>Source: <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/08/24/alan_simpson_social_security_n_693277.html" target="_hplink">The Huffington Post</a></strong>

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