"The law says that you cannot touch, but I think I see a lot of law breakers up in this house tonight."
It may be hard to imagine anyone other than Matthew McConaughey reciting that infamous "Magic Mike" line, but Jason Biggs gave it his best shot in this recently unearthed -- and clearly fake -- audition tape.
The "American Pie" star (almost) nailed the accent, but he failed to capture McConaughey's effortless swagger, especially when things start to get kinky around the 3:50 mark. Looks like Biggs days on the stripper poll were in vain. And if you don't feel like looking at Biggs' behind -- oh, how its changed since 1999's "American Pie" -- then you probably won't want to watch past the 4:30 mark.
Watch Biggs' "Magic Mike" audition tape above.