When Amy Poehler and Will Arnett announced they were splitting earlier this month, it was a sad ending for the longtime comedic power couple who had managed to stay out of the tabloids while creating a beautiful, redheaded family. But then Patti Stanger had to weigh in. The outspoken and often downright nasty star of Bravo's "Millionaire Matchmaker," Stanger recently landed a gig blogging about relationships for People.com, and not surprisingly, managed to fit her entire foot in her mouth.
Taking aim at the Poehler-Arnett breakup, 51-year-old Stanger continued to prove she is stuck in the 1950s, offering antiquated stereotypes that manage to simultaneously belittle both comedy stars. It's rather impressive, really.
She starts by evaluating each career, a blind evaluation readers will just have to take at face value. Finding Arnett lacking, Stanger gets to thinking. "Amy is undeniably the more well known and successful of the two," Stanger writes. "I can't help but wonder if that contributed to their divorce. Being more successful than your man can weigh heavy on a relationship."
The celebrity matchmaker goes on to throw out some thoughts on a prehistoric truth: men like to provide.
This goes back to the cavemen days. Men like to provide for women and their families. It's in their DNA. I'm obviously no scientist, but I bet if you could hear a Y-chromosome talk, it would say, "I want to provide and hunt."
It's also society's fault. Because apparently, "the rest of the world" isn't comfortable with a woman "bringing home the bacon." While this may be true for some men, the main flaw in Stanger's logic is that if so, the burden rests on the man's insecure, if broad, shoulders.
Similarly, "if you're a successful woman," your emailing, phone calls and business trips can start to make your man "feel left out" of a very important and very time-consuming part of your life.
What is lacking from the column is any real advice for overcoming said obstacles. Does Stanger think a relationship in which the woman makes more money is ultimately doomed? Because even in Hollywood, examples abound, from superstar Julia Roberts' decade-long marriage to cameraman Daniel Moder, to Reese Witherspoon, who recently married talent agent Jim Toth.
Ultimately, the real issue with the column is that it's almost definitely wrong.
Poehler and Arnett were married in August 2003 and have two boys together. The amicable split, according to Radar Online, was not a bitter outward expression of any kind of frustrated, insecure career squabble, but rather one of those countless examples of couples who just drift apart. It happens, it's sad. It's also really none of Patti Stanger's business.
On the other hand, the self-titled relationship expert has a habit of generalizing, erroneously, like when she said "there is no curbing the gay," implying that gays don't really do the whole monogamy thing, and adding that "nobody wants a queen." Stanger has also said that women should avoid multisyllabic words or mentioning a high SAT score to a man before he pops the question.