Until now, when we thought "Santa" we imagined a jolly old man with a bright red suit, a long white beard, rosy red cheeks and a jovial expression. But it turns out we've been doing it all wrong.

Thanks to the artists (we use that term loosely) behind the 30 depictions of ol' Saint Nick below, we realized that we've been forgetting to add shifty eyes, four inches of extra forehead and an emaciated frame to the ol' Saint Nick in our minds. Oh, and did you know that Father Christmas is really just an old baby with a beard?

Just check out 30 of the creepiest Santa dolls the Internet has to offer below to see what we mean.

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  • Toothy Nightmare

    "The better to eat you with, my dear."

  • Shifty-Eyed Santa

    He has ways of knowing if you've been naughty.

  • Delinquent Santa

    He only has to be "on" one day a year.

  • Hardcore Santa

    We don't want to know our Santa's dark backstory.

  • Heroin Chic Santa

    It looks like Santa's going to use this year's 364-day vacation in rehab.

  • Faceless Santa

    "Please, someone find my nose."

  • Torso-less Santa

    Where do the cookies and milk go?

  • Giant Forehead Santa

    Oh no! Someone replaced his eyebrows with packing peanuts!

  • Hulk Hands Santa

    Santa SMASH!

  • Far Away Santa

    Vacant stare aside, he looks like Big Boy, but grown up.

  • Baffling Santa

    This is our first entry in the "creepy baby santa" subcategory.

  • Flirty Santa

    Wouldn't it be kind of amazing to find out that Santa's been a woman this entire time?

  • "I Know Something You Don't Know" Santa

    What are you looking at, old man?

  • Lazy Santa

    "Ah, just put a Santa costume on that elf and call it a day."

  • "About To Sneeze" Santa

    At least, we hope that's what this expression means.

  • Santa With Extra Skin

    What is up with his forehead?

  • Hermit Santa

    "Just give him some twigs."

  • Serial Killer Santa

    He will find you.

  • Depressed Santa

    Like Droopy Dog, only sadder, because it's Christmas.

  • Deformed Santa

    Sadly, Santa lost his right eye in an unfortunate reindeer accident.

  • Shocked Santa

    Look, he sees you when you're sleeping. He knows.

  • Benjamin Button Santa

    Why do they keep making Santa look like an old baby?

  • Scary Santa

    There's no way this came out exactly as planned.

  • Smoking Santa

    His expression tells us there might not be tabacco in that pipe.

  • Bearded Baby Santa

    Did a Bratz doll give birth to this?

  • Sassy Santa

    This Santa is showing some serious 'tude.

  • Who Are We Kidding? Santa

    You just drew white eyelashes on a regular doll.

  • Egg Santa

    We'll call this the demonic spawn of Christmas and Easter.

  • Zombie Santa

    To be fair, zombies are very "in" this year.

  • Angry Puppet Santa

    OK, we're done now.

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