WOMEN
03/29/2013 04:43 pm ET

8 Things Women Need To Be B*tches To Do, According To Books

Judging from the publishing industry, all women are b*tches -- or need to be in order to succeed at, well, pretty much anything. After one-too-many "you probably work with lots of catty/b*tchy ladies" books came across our desks, we decided to do a little digging. And it turns out that there are a whole lot of things that we supposedly should be b*tches to do. Who knew?

Here are eight of them:

Budget

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via Amazon

We were previously unaware that you shouldn't be kind when you're trying to cut back on your monthly expenses. Noted.

Get Married

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via Amazon

Just in case you were afraid that the "Bridezilla" stereotype was out the door, know there's a "Bridal B*tch" in all of us, and she can't possibly plan a wedding without paying $18.95 for this book.

Be Thin

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via Amazon

Not only do you have to be skinny, you have to be a mean girl to get there.

Do Yoga (And Get Enlightened)

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via Amazon

And you thought yoga was about Buddhism and getting centered and doing no harm.

Run (And Be Fat)

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via Amazon

Apparently, one must be a b*tch when doing any sort of exercise -- at any weight.

Be Happy

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via Amazon

Seriously?

Have Sex

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via Amazon

Because there's no other way to ask for what you want in bed.

Date (Men)

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via Amazon

It's unclear whether women who date women need to be b*tches as well.

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