When you become a parent, you find yourself spending money on things you never even knew existed -- snotsuckers, windis, teething tablets. And while some silly-sounding products become daily essentials (thank you, pee pee teepees), others are useless -- and downright ridiculous.

It's been almost two years since we unveiled our baby "un-registry" -- 11 "essential" products to leave out of your shopping carts. And now, we bring you the updated version with even more items for both babies and big kids that leave us seriously confused. Why, baby butt fan, why?!


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  • ToeBlooms

    For your baby's next trip to Vegas. <a href="http://www.toeblooms.com/product-giggles" target="_blank">via ToeBlooms.com</a>

  • The Breastfeeding Hat

    A nipple hat just isn't a good look on anyone. <a href="http://www.etsy.com/listing/98147587/sale-fun-crocheted-boobie-beanie?ref=sr_gallery_11&ga_search_query=breastfeeding+hat&ga_search_type=handmade&ga_facet=handmadebreastfeeding+hat&ga_view_type=gallery" target="_blank">via Etsy</a>

  • Baby Butt Fan

    Or, you know ...wipes? <a href="http://www.infantbreeze.com/ProductDetails.asp?ProductCode=BBF2011-01" target="_blank">via infantbreeze.com</a>

  • Baby's Poop Alarm

    Right, because you might miss the smell. <a href="http://www.dhgate.com/babies-poop-alarm-baby-poop-predictor-with/p-ff8080812be7cfd9012be8fc63077f62.html" target="_blank">via DHgate.com</a>

  • Aston Martin Stroller

    For $3,000 it better change diapers and make baby food too. <a href="http://www.nydailynews.com/life-style/aston-martin-reveals-3-000-baby-stroller-article-1.1275703#ixzz2MICVXdI2" target="_blank">via NY Daily News</a>

  • The iPotty

    Are iPads even water proof? <strong><a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/01/10/ipotty-how-to-potty-train_n_2442653.html" target="_blank">Read More>></a></strong>

  • The Snozzie

    This is a bracelet to wipe baby's drool or snot. Tissues, people. <a href="http://www.snozzie.com/shop.html" target="_blank">via snozzie.com</a>

  • Ribs Teether

    This isn't what they meant by "baby back" ribs. <a href="http://www.littletoader.com/Teething-Toys-Free-Baby-Appeteether/dp/B003OEDYCA?class=quickView&field_availability=-1&field_browse=2400820011&field_product_site_launch_date_utc=-1y&id=Teething+Toys+Free+Baby+Appeteether&ie=UTF8&refinementHistory=brandtextbin%2Csubjectbin%2Ccolor_map%2Cprice%2Csize_name%2Cmetalbin%2Cage_range_description&searchNodeID=2400820011&searchPage=1&searchRank=salesrank&searchSize=12" target="_blank">via littletoader.com</a>

  • Designer Perfume

    Even Dolce & Gabbana can't make dirty-diaper-smell go away. <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/01/28/baby-perfume-dolce-and-gabbana_n_2567038.html?1359399070" target="_blank">via HuffPost</a>

  • Potty Mitts

    We're just trying to figure out how to wipe with those things on... <a href="http://www.tudys.com/potty.php?t=Potty%20Mitts" target="_blank">via tudys.com</a>

  • Infant Flip Flops

    First of all, babies who are not walking yet don't need shoes at all. Second of all, ouch. <a href="http://www.etsy.com/listing/99995285/baby-girl-flip-flops-infant-flip-flops?ref=sr_gallery_21&ga_search_query=baby&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_ship_to=US&ga_page=8&ga_search_type=all" target="_blank">via Etsy</a>

  • Diaper Cover And Matching Tie

    Well, if you're gonna use a diaper cover you might actually need that poop alarm. <a href="http://www.etsy.com/listing/92641917/matching-tie-and-diaper-cover-baby?ref=sr_gallery_9&ga_search_query=diaper+cover+baby&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_ship_to=US&ga_ref=related&ga_page=1&ga_search_type=all" target="_blank">via Etsy </a>

  • Baby Bikini

    You guys, her bod is totes beach ready. <a href="http://www.babikini.com/index.htm" target="_blank">via babykini.com</a>

  • The Baby Mop

    Swiffer will work just fine. <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/11/13/baby-mop_n_2117703.html" target="_blank">Read More>></a>

  • Mother's 3rd Arm

    That kid is old enough to use his own arms. <a href="http://www.mothers3rdarm.com/en/" target="_blank">via mothers3rdarm.com </a>

  • A Backpack With A Seat

    One word: Walk. <a href="http://myfreeloader.com/news-reviews" target="_blank">via myfreeloader.com</a>

  • Clip-On Stroller Fan

    His finger doesn't look safe. <a href="http://www.onestepahead.com/product/Clip-On-Stroller-Fan/_/R-536614?cmSource=OSAhpCustFav" target="_blank">via onestepahead.com</a>

  • Baby Cleats

    Not yet walking. But sure, playing soccer. <a href="http://www.shopsugarbabies.com/Cleats-for-Him_p_6676.html" target="_blank">via shopsugarbabies.com</a>

  • iPhone Teether

    Then try telling your kid later that "phones are not toys." <a href="http://www.etsy.com/listing/109318391/baby-toy-teether-phone-toy-iphone?ref=sr_gallery_8&ga_search_query=baby+toys&ga_order=most_relevant&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_ship_to=US&ga_search_type=all" target="_blank">via etsy.com</a>

  • Potty Reminder Watch

    If you're old enough to use a watch, you are old enough to listen to your body. <a href="http://www.onestepahead.com/product/Potty-Time-Reminder-Watch-for-Kids/_/R-534066" target="_blank">via OneStepAhead</a>

  • Bug Car Seat Cover

    Aw! But, what? <a href="http://www.onestepahead.com/product/Widgeon-Snugaroo-Infant-Car-Seat-Cover/_/R-538520" target="_blank">via Onestepahead.com</a>

  • $700 Pony Chair

    Giddy up? <a href="http://www.littlenest.com/childrens-kids-pony-chair.php" target="_blank">via littlenest.com</a>

  • The Daddle

    Or, Giddy-up? <a href="http://www.horse.com/item/the-daddle-by-cashel/SLT673845/?srccode=GPHORSE&gclid=COa6wZbY8rUCFS4aOgodli8Alw" target="_blank">via horse.com</a> and <a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B003EWECSC/ref=as_li_ss_tl?ie=UTF8&tag=socisoun-20&linkCode=as2&camp=1789&creative=390957&creativeASIN=B003EWECSC" target="_blank">Amazon</a>

  • Guard To Stop Finger-Sucking Habits

    His thumb is still pretty readily available... <a href="http://www.onestepahead.com/product/FingerGuard/_/R-535514" target="_blank">via Onestepahead</a>

  • 'Keurig' Look-A-Like (But For Formula)

    Better not mix up your machines in the morning. <a href="https://www.babynes.ch/FR/Pages/accueil-babynes.aspx" target="_blank">via babynes.ch</a>

  • Prenatal MP3 Player

    Singing. It's free. via <a href="http://www.thinkgeek.com/geek-kids/newborn-infant/b723/?cpg=cj&ref=&CJURL=&CJID=2511918" target="_hplink">thinkgeek.com</a>

  • Designer Barf Bags

    A bag draped in diamonds won't cure your morning sickness. Ginger ale, saltines and -- with luck -- the second trimester will. via <a href="http://www.morningchicnessbags.com/" target="_hplink">morningchicnessbags.com</a>

  • The Peekaru

    Peek-a-no. via <a href="http://www.togetherbe.com/productDescriptionPeekaruOriginal.aspx" target="_hplink">togetherbe.com</a>

  • The Hair Bib

    There's a reason why God invented bath-time. via <a href="http://www.crumbcap.com/" target="_hplink">crumbcap.com</a>

  • Over-The-Door Baby Hanger

    Your purse, your jacket, your baby... whatever. via <a href="http://www.mommysentials.com/item_10/The-BabyKeeper-Basic.htm" target="_hplink">mommysentials.com</a>

  • Baby Bathrobe

    Only if you're going for Play-Baby of the month. via <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Hooded-Bathrobe-Applique-Cotton-Treated/dp/B003LMZFX6/ref=sr_1_22?s=apparel&ie=UTF8&qid=1315596601&sr=1-22" target="_hplink">Amazon.com</a>

  • Padded Baby Helmet

    Baby proof the house, not the baby. via <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Jolly-Jumper-Bumper-Toddler-Cushion/dp/B003KVWKZO" target="_hplink">amazon.com</a>

  • My Pee Pee Bottle

    Really? You want to throw aim into the mess that is potty training? via <a href=" http://www.mypeepeebottle.com/" target="_hplink">mypeepeebottle.com</a>

  • The Time-Out Pad

    We're pretty sure your child will let you know when time-out is over. via <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Time-Out-Pad-HD015-Blue/dp/B001IMG5WG/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1311202570&sr=8-1" target="_hplink">amazon.com</a>

  • Keep Clicking...

    <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/07/15/inappropriate-onesies_n_1672222.html" target="_blank">Inappropriate Baby Clothes That Don't Make Sense On Babies</a> <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/06/07/awkward-baby-shower-cakes_n_1571619.html" target="_blank">Awkward Baby Shower Cakes</a> <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/09/20/babies-gang-signs_n_1891304.html" target="_blank">Babies Throwin' Up Gang Signs </a>