Today, women around the world weep for the engagement news that has swept the Web. Though it hurts to admit, we can no longer question where the "Mentally Dating Adam Levine" checkbox is when asked for our relationship status. We can no longer imagine his future lyrics will be about us. That beautifully tattooed and toned body is no longer ours for the taking.
However, that doesn't mean we can't lament this Hollywood abomination. Below sums up our feelings on the no-longer-available Adam Levine using his own lyrics.
Besides, what does his fiancee have that we don't have, right?
1. "Why am I holding on? We knew this day would come. We knew it all along. How did it come so fast?"
2. "I don't mind spending every day out on your corner in the pouring rain. Look for the girl with the broken smile. Ask her if she wants to stay awhile."
3. "You can't expect me to be fine, I don't expect you to care."
4. "I am in misery. There ain't nobody who can comfort me. Why won't you answer me? The silence is slowly killing me."
5."I still don't have the reason and you don't have the time. And it really makes me wonder if I ever gave a f*ck about you."
6. "Six foot tall, came without a warning so I had to shoot [her] dead. [S]he won't come around here anymore. Come around here? I don't think so."
7. "Like a little girl cries in the face of a monster that lives in her dreams...is there anyone out there 'cause it's getting harder and harder to breathe?"
8. "Obsessed, depressed at the same time. I can't even walk in a straight line. I've been lying in the dark no sunshine."
9. "I'm desperate and confused so far away from you. I'm getting there, I don't care where I have to run."
10. "And I wrote two hundred letters I will never send. Sometimes these cuts are so much deeper than they seem."
11. "This love has taken its toll on me."
12. "It's not always rainbows and butterflies."
13. "Yeah, but baby there you go again, there you go again, making me love you. Yeah, I stopped using my head, using my head, let it all go. Got you stuck on my body, on my body, like a tattoo. And now I'm feeling stupid, feeling stupid, crawling back to you."
14. "What you are doing is screwing things up inside my head."
15. "I've been here before, one day I'll wake up and it won't hurt anymore."
16. "If I never see your face again I don't mind."
17. "It makes me burn to learn you're with another [wo]man. I wonder if [s]he's half the lover that I am."
18. "Every night you cry yourself to sleep thinking: 'Why does this happen to me? Why does every moment have to be so hard?'"
19. "What I would give to have you look in my direction and I'd give my life to somehow attract your attention. And I touch myself like it's somebody else. Thoughts of you are tattooed on my mind."
20. "I am so confused by this. I know that life is hit or miss. Days are stung by too much sun, I think that you may be the one."
21. "If 'Happy Ever After' did exist, I would still be holding you like this. All those fairy tales are full of sh*t. One more f*cking love song, I'll be sick."