Behold the best 1980s fraternity recruitment video you can imagine, courtesy of the University of Southern California Eta Delta chapter of Chi Phi (and YouTube).
The video, "Why Chi Phi," was made by the Chi Phi brothers at USC for rush back in 1988. This masterpiece includes plenty of '80s hallmarks: cheesy pixelation and sepia video effects, fashion inspired by Run DMC and the Beastie Boys, plus a couple mullets. And, of course, three guys performing some slow rap over a synth-heavy instrumental with a high treble bass line and record scratches.
Key quotes from these powerful lyrics: "I'm smelling like a drunk cause I'm ever-clear" and "I'm badder than cool, and cooler than that."
It appears this USC chapter of Chi Phi is no longer around, but if you need more '80s frat awesomeness, you can check out this YouTube video of the 1987 pledge game between USC's Chi Phi and Lambda Chi Alpha chapters.