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Our Dream 'Hey Arnold!' Cast In Real Life

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HEY ARNOLD NICKELODEON
Who would star in a real life version of the "Hey Arnold!" cartoon? | Tumblr.com

Nickelodeon nostalgia, anyone?

From 1996 to 2004, kids got their kicks from Craig Bartlett's cartoon "Hey Arnold!" The show focused on the quietly cool fourth grader Arnold, his grandparents' city dwellings and Arnold's kooky classmates.

"Hey Arnold!" covered a laundry list of adolescent issues -- relentless bullies, lovestruck crushes and a grueling search for adoptive parents. These relatable storylines struck a chord with audiences and cemented the show's cult status so much that a feature film, "Hey Arnold! The Movie," was released in June 2002.

Sure, 20-somethings can catch their favorite football head as part of "The '90s Are All That" TeenNick lineup. But what if we took the show's influence a step further?

In the spirit of a fellow forever missed "funnie" Nicktoon, we dreamed up the ultimate Hollywood cast to portray the P.S. 118 gang.

1. Arnold: Disney Channel veteran Sterling Knight is our pick for Arnold. Thanks to his roles in "Sonny With a Chance" and "17 Again," Knight has the experience to portray an angsty, imaginative kid. He resembles Arnold's blond, boyish appearance, too. As for the football head? Not so much (but then again, we've never seen a real prolate spheroid-shaped skull).

arnold

2. Gerald Johanssen: There's no better way to put it -- Jaden Smith IS Gerald Johanssen. Both guys ooze coolness in whatever they do. They're laid back, a bit mysterious and musically inclined. Not to mention that hair. Jaden's got this character on lock.

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3. Helga Pataki: Hands down the most entertaining "Hey Arnold!" character is Helga. DOY. AnnaSophia Robb would do incredible justice to the lovelorn bully with a secret lust for Arnold. Robb could channel her competitive, bratty Violet Beauregarde role for Pataki tomboy inspiration ("Charlie and the Chocolate Factory," anyone?). Plus, Violet loved chomping gum and Helga had a secret Arnold shrine made of the sticky stuff.

helga

4. Phoebe Heyerdahl: Hailee Steinfeld emulates the mature-beyond-her-years vibe akin to Phoebe. Better known as Helga's often-ignored sidekick, Phoebe is small but mighty. No problem ... Oscar nominee Steinfeld has the range to pack a powerful punch at only 16 years old. Don't forget that Phoebe crushed on Gerald. Jaden and Hailee would be SO cute together.

phoebe

5. Harold Berman: More talk than walk, Harold is the second toughest bully of the group. He bosses kids around with backup from Sid and Stinky, though he is a self-proclaimed Mama's boy. Heck, Helga usually left Harold cowering in the streets. Jonah Hill captures the nagging, self-absorbed teen (read "Superbad") and has childish whining down pat.

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6. Stinky Peterson: Oh Stinky. His Southern drawl made him a ladies' man, dating the likes of Helga, Gloria and Lila. The pumpkin growing, lemon pudding lover occasionally weirded us out, which is why Kodi Smit-McPhee is our Peterson pick. The "Let Me In" actor convincingly played creepy so we reckon he'd pull off Stinky's strange ways.

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7. Eugene Horowitz: Poor Eugene. He's the class jinx: forever unlucky, socially awkward yet painfully optimistic despite being a full-blown geek. "Modern Family" jokester Nolan Gould is a Mensa member and graduated from high school at 13! He's the nerd Eugene aspired to be.

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8. Rhonda Wellington Lloyd: Rhonda, Rhonda, Rhonda. She's the wealthy, arrogant fashionista of the class. It would be entertaining to see Vanessa Hudgens take on this stuck-up persona, a true departure from her sugary sweet "High School Musical" days. Hudgens is also a trendsetter in her own right!

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9. Sid: Gerald's lead-in man "from kid generation to kid generation." Sid makes up a troublemaking trio with Stinky and Harold though he is quite paranoid over his actions. He's a little spastic and freaks out after random events, such as thinking he killed the school principal from a soap-carved voodoo doll. The bizarre situations Sid finds himself in and his explosive, odd behavior are reminiscent of Drake Bell's "Drake and Josh" stint.

sid

10. Ruth McDougal: Arnold's crush in the first season was this sixth grade braceface. She was perfection in his eyes. "Shake It Up" actress Bella Thorne is familiar with stressful school drama and she's gorgeous, to boot. We could totally see Sterling Knight pining for the Disney darling.

ruth

11. Grandma Gertie: Grandpa Phil's Pookie! She's a seasoned martial arts master, wears themed outfits and is generally off her rocker. Only Cloris Leachman could handle Grandma Gertie's craziness!

grandma

12. Grandpa Phil: Grandpa Phil is the goofy voice of reason to Arnold, aka "Short Man." He was also a WWII veteran, champion Chinese checkers player and all-around stand out at Sunset Arms. Hollywood legend Peter O'Toole could pull off Phil's kooky charisma and surprising personality depth.

grandpa

13. Bob Pataki: The end-all, be-all of doppelganger matches. Seriously ... the resemblance is uncanny! Dan Lauria played the ultimate tough love dad on "The Wonder Years." He would fit in just fine as Helga's brute, booming father, Big Bob Pataki.

bob

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