HOME
10/03/2013 08:12 am ET Updated Oct 03, 2013

Vintage Furniture Ad Says Playmates Are Best Kept In Chests, Proves Sex Doesn't Always Sell (PHOTO)

From the "If Sterling Cooper Was A Real Ad Agency" department comes this gem of a furniture advertisement that tries to convince hapless fedora-wearing men that all a woman really needs is a hope chest. Actually, she really wants you to propose to her already, for God's sake. But if you can't, the next best thing is a big ol' trunk that she can fill with photos of you, a too-small wedding dress and her bitter tears.

And no worries if you can't be there, because you'd rather be nursing a Canadian Club (and a stewardess) instead of shopping. This ad also gives you the power to send a little gift certificate to your lady. After all, it's the "home-before-marriage to most young ladies who love to fill it with soft things."

While most modern women have yet to solve that "where shall I put my soft things?" age-old problem, it's probably because we're all out trying to earn a living. We do get a small kick out of the wordplay in the tagline -- that "playmates" (read: "Playboy" magazines) are best kept in chests -- but not sure if that helps Lane's argument here.

Snide remarks aside, we do think that the Lane chest is a thing of beauty that many of us would like to own (especially a pristine vintage version). We're just happy that the biggest sin of furniture ads these days is being a bit on the boring side.

h/t to the Vintage Ads subreddit and eBay

Have something to say? Check out HuffPost Home on Twitter, Facebook, Pinterest, Tumblr and Instagram.

PHOTO GALLERIES
Incredible Vintage Ads
Subscribe to the Lifestyle email.
Life hacks and juicy stories to get you through the week.

CONVERSATIONS